Plan 9 Crunch: Review of the Day

Have Rocket Will Travel: -- Stooges fall down!

2009-09-20T08:49:00.000-07:00

By Doug Gibson

If you want to watch the Three Stooges in a movie, watch the unknown oater gem Gold Raiders but don't watch Have Rocket Will Travel, a pathetic 1959 mess that even the most dedicated Teletubbies watcher will not stomach.

It's a dreadful hodgepodge of unfunniness. The boys, Moe, Larry and Curly Joe, are dimwitted janitors who befriend a sexy scientist. They blunder into a space ship and head off to a planet. There they encounter a talking unicorn and match wits with an even stupider master computer that HAL would have drowned in a river.

Once the doofuses return home, an additional party scene is tacked on and then this tired mess, directed by David Lowell Rich, finally ends. It's a very long 76 B&W minutes.

I have nothing against the Stooges. I like their shorts. If you want to see the trio at their best, catch any number of the Columbia one-reeler. But avid this horrendous mess.

My review of Best Worst Movie

2009-08-15T00:21:00.000-07:00

Film tells the story of the cult of 'Troll 2'

By Doug Gibson

This review originally appeared in the Aug. 11, 2009 Standard-Examiner.

http://www.standard.net/live/opinion/topofutahvoices/180254/

There is a scene in "Best Worst Movie," Utah native Michael Stephenson's film homage to "Troll 2," the movie that haunted his youth, where a young Los Angeles woman explains that you can't understand how remarkable "Troll 2" is with only a recap of the plot.

If you tell someone that it's about a family that goes on vacation and battles human-eating vegetarian goblins, they won't get it, she says. They must experience it, she insists.

She nails it. For those who love a cult film, telling others why it's so great can make us feel like a Mormon missionary in West Hollywood -- they give us a hostile, guarded, "no" look. But when we finally find that rare investigator who watches the film, feels what we do, and becomes a convert, it's just like the angels are singing!

"Troll 2," filmed mostly in Morgan County about 20 years ago with an Italian crew and novice actors, created no buzz. Unreleased in the U.S. and quickly shelved to video, its biggest impact was the long-term embarrassment it brought stars Stephenson, who played a young boy, Connie Young, who played his teenage sister, and George Hardy, who played their dad.

Its director was Claudio Fragasso, a gore-helmer more comfortable directing blood 'n guts zombie films in Europe. Its screenwriter, Rossella Drudi, candidly admits her script is a polemic against vegetarianism. Its bizarre, fractured plot, blended with poor acting, silly costumes and jaw-dropping dialogue, make it an '80s big-hair mix of "Rocky Horror Picture Show" and "Plan 9 From Outer Space."

How could this film not find a cult? And sure enough, "line upon line, precept upon precept," "Troll 2" started gaining converts. The film has played to sold-out crowds across the nation. "Nilbog Invasion," last year's pilgrimage to Morgan, was nirvana for fans.

Back to "Best Worst Movie," which plays this weekend at the Salt Lake City Film Festival. It's that rare treatise of a cult film that can appeal both to cultists and the uninitiated. Stephenson's direction is superb. He mixes scenes well. Transitions are smooth and no scene lingers too long. "Best Worst Movie" is not static, a fault that mars documentaries about another great cult film, "Plan 9 From Outer Space."

"Best Worst Movie" belongs to star Hardy. Stephenson centers his film around the Alabama dentist, who for almost two decades regularly fields the question, "Didn't I see you in a movie?" You can't help but like the charismatic Hardy, with his upbeat persona, smile and big laugh. He seems bewildered, yet delighted, with his film's postponed success. The scenes of Hardy's quiet life in Alexander City, Ala., are very interesting. The viewer will enjoy watching Hardy and Stephenson mingle with fans and encourage other "Troll 2" participants to join the screenings and talk about the film and their lives.

And therein lies a reason Stephenson's film appeals to all viewers. Save for director Fragasso, most agree the film is a turkey. They're just grateful that there was some element in its awfulness that turned it into a cult film. Fragasso also fascinates. He's a complex subject. He's a gracious, upbeat showman most of the time, but Stephenson manages to capture his anger and bitterness when he hears the cast mocking the film or audiences laughing at scenes he directed as serious drama.

Cast and crew provide more human interest. Robert Ormsby, "Grandpa Seth" in "Troll 2," freely admits that he's "frittered his life away." There's the semi-disturbing scenes of "Troll 2" star Margo Prey (mom in the film) being visited by Hardy and Stephenson. Prey lives a reclusive life tending to her aged mom. Calling Prey very eccentric is likely an understatement.

"Troll 2" stars Young and Darren Ewing are still working actors. Their reactions to the cult of "Troll 2" provide interesting contrasts. Young, although a good sport, admits she's not a convert and is bewildered by the cult enthusiasm. Ewing, however, embraces the Warholesque "fame" and accompanies Hardy to fan festivals in Europe and Texas.

The festivals are a bust, though, and Hardy admits he's getting tired of the "Troll 2" notoriety. Just before the film ends, he tallies his personal and professional life as far bigger accomplishments than his 15 minutes of "Troll 2" fame.

He's then asked if he would star in a "Troll 2" sequel Fragasso and Drudi are preparing.

If you want to know the answer, go see the movie.

Here is a link to the "Best Worst Movie" Web site: http://bestworstmovie.com/

Dick Tracy vs. Cueball

2009-08-09T16:39:00.000-07:00

By Doug Gibson

The Medved brothers list Dick Tracy Vs. Cueball as one of the 5o worst films in their book, The 50 Worst Films of All Time, that was a popular a generation ago.

They're wrong, of course, "Dick Tracy vs. Cueball," from RKO Radio Pictures, is a lean 62-minute programmer that provides exactly what is offers. A cartoonish detective story of the famous detective stopping a dangerous mug, Cueball, who starts strangling people with a hatband who get in his way of getting full value for the diamonds he stole.

Morgan Conway as Tracy lacks the facial looks and screen presence that Ralph Byrd brought to the role but he does an OK job. The funny-pages feel to the picture is accentuated by colorful characters, including Anne Jeffreys as Tess Truehart, Tracy's girl and Lyle Latell as Pat Patton, Tracy's silly sidekick.

The other characters have names that highlight their personalities, such as Jewels Sparkle, Percival Priceless, Vitamin Flintheart, Filthy Flora and, of course, the baddie Cueball, played in sinister fashion by Dick Wessel. A chief clue toward catching Cueball is learned when a youngster tells Tracy all the kids bought hatbands made by a prisoner who was recently released. ...

A 50 worst film? ... NONSENSE. I loved this action programmer from director Gordon Douglas. Why don't we watch the trailer below!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iVOZRFEk5Pk

The Raven

2009-08-02T14:45:00.000-07:00

By Doug Gibson

Simply put, "The Raven" (1935) is a masterpiece. And credit for its perfection belongs to star Bela Lugosi, who is magnificent as the brilliant, deranged, courtly and insane Dr. Richard Vollin, who is so obsessed with Edgar Allan Poe that he has built real Poe-inspired torture devices in his dungeon.

Lugosi's Vollin is implored upon to save the life of a beautiful dancer, Jean Thatcher. Once he restores her to health, he fall in lust with her and wants her for himself. Rebuffed by Thatcher's father, he hatches a plan to invite the dancer, her father, her fiance, and others to be tortured and murdered. In his feverish mind, Vollin believes that by killing, he can be released from his Poe obsessions.

Vollin's unwilling helper is Edmond Bateman, a murderer on the lam who bewails his ugly face. He begs Vollin to bring beauty to his countenance. Instead, Vollin makes him uglier and then promises to fix his ugliness after he kills his guests.

Lugosi is juat brilliant. He's gentlemanly and manic, polite and cruel, courteous and a raving lunatic. The short, 61-minute film is tightly directed by Lew Landers. It is an example of Universal's cruelty to Lugosi that he received only half as much as Karloff earned, although Lugosi's Vollin is the real star, the real villain.

This is a film that should not be missed by any horror film fan.

'Potter' takes on vampires

2009-07-26T20:40:00.000-07:00

This editorial originally ran in the July 15, 2009 Standard-Examiner newspaper:

http://www.standard.net/live/opinion/editorials/178403/

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince" opens in theaters today. Although author J.K. Rowling wrapped up the series almost two years ago, it's been a very long film wait between No. 5, "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix" and No. 6 "the Half-Blood Prince."
Perhaps Harry Potter's long cinema hiatus is because the boy wizard is battling an otherworldly creature even more ferocious than death eaters or even Lord Voldemort -- teenage vampires.

It's no secret that Stephenie Meyer's smoldering tales of chaste lust between a teenage vampire boy and virginal human girl have drawn in millions of youngsters entering the teen years who spent their earlier years with Harry Potter, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Hogwarts may be a fascinating place for readers to hang out, but Twilight has almost steamy scenes of heroes Edward Cullen and Bella Swan making out on Bella's bed while clueless dad sleeps away in another part of the house.

Even "Harry Potter" star Emma Watson, who plays Hermione Granger in the series, admits to being hooked on the "Twilight" series. And "Half-Blood Prince" director David Yates admits that there's a lot more "snogging" -- British slang for kissing -- in this latest Harry Potter film.

Are Meyer's vampire tales crowding out "Harry Potter?" Although the "Twilight" book saga has also finished, Meyer's novels are easily outselling Rowling's for the past year. In overal sales, though, Rowling's seven books still rule at 400 million, compared to 53 million tallied for the four "Twilight" books. But the first "Twilight" film's amazing numbers, a $382 million haul last fall on a tiny $37 million budget, underscores that Meyer's series has growing global appeal that will only mean larger numbers in the next few years. It's a fair question to wonder which books pre-teens -- particularly girls -- are apt to start reading first: "Harry Potter" or "Twilight."

Industry analysts will be watching the box office take of "Half-Blood Prince" this weekend. Will its long break from movies adversely affect the "Potter" box office? In what might be construed as a nod to "Twilight's" sex appeal, ads and trailers to the new "Potter" film have explicitely stressed the budding teenage romances between Ron Weasley and Lavender Brown, Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger, and finally Harry Potter and the once-in-the-background Ginny Weasley.

No doubt Warner Bros. executives are hoping "Half-Blood" stars Daniel Radcliffe and Bonnie Wright will generate at least a portion of the onscreen sex chemistry between "Twilight" stars Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart. So far adventure, not sex, has sold the "Potter" series. It would be a mistake to trade the adventure for the modern gothic sexuality of "Twilight," but a little sex appeal might add some much-needed spice to the "Harry Potter" film series.

Purists will argue with us, saying that the films simply follow the books. That's true, but the "Potter" books can be long, and not everything Rowling writes makes it into the films. Portions and plot twists, particularly in books 4 and 5, have been excised from the film versions.

So, to us at least, the fact that all that snogging in "Half-Blood Prince" has made it to the screen tells us that the creative forces behind "Half-Blood Prince" are paying attention to all those fans who swoon over the romance in "Twilight."

Review: The Black Cat

2009-07-08T14:01:00.000-07:00

By Doug Gibson

The 1934 Universal Studios' The Black Cat is a magnificent film, the best pairing of stars Bela Lugosi and Boris Karloff. It is masterfully understated, both rivals mad but possessed of grace, dignity and impeccable manners. Lugosi is the good guy, but he's also crazy enough to skin the bad guy (Karloff) alive at the end.

The plot involves an American mystery writer, and his fiance (Julie Bishop) honeymooning in Hungary. They meet a courtly gentleman, Dr. Vitus Werdegast, who is traveling to meet an old nemesis, Hjalmar Poelzig, played by Boris Karloff. It reminds me a bit of the famous Hungarian novel, Embers. The tone of the film has a classic Hungarian fatalism.

While traveling to a city, a coach overturns. The young couple and Lugosi seek shelter at Karloff's forbidding castle. It is built on the site of a prison, where Werdegast was once held. He seeks his wife and daughter, who were in Poelzig's care. Karloff's Poelzig is the soul of courtesy, but that masks a truly terrifying evil. There are dark secrets in Castle Poelzig, and once Werdegast learns them he's driven to righteous madness.

Stuck in the middle of this is the young bride (Bishop) who becomes an object of desire to Poelzig. Naturally, that puts her husband in danger too.

This brisk, 65-minute horror film is well directed by Edgar Ulmer, who later hamstrung his career by winning the heart of a Universal executive's wife. The plot moves at a dignified pace, and what is literally a cinematic chess game grows more sinister until suddenly the horror of Karloff's character bursts out to the audience.

Lugosi excells at his role, that of a decent man with decent gestures who can't suppress his bitterness and longing. His final rage is memorable. There's little of Edgar Allen Poe's tale, just a cat that Lugosi's Werdegast has a phobia of and Karloff sometimes puts to use.

Horror fans, and Universal afficianados will love this black and white classic. Watch it in a single setting, marvel at the skill of horror experts Lugosi and Karloff. They deserve such respect.

Review: Frankenstein 1970

2009-07-06T20:30:00.000-07:00

By Doug Gibson

"Frankenstein 1970" is pretty bad. And that's a shame, since the 1958 independent film, directed by Howard Koch, stars Boris Karloff as Baron Victor Von Frankenstein, last descendant of the infamous Dr. Frankenstein. Von Frankenstein, who suffers torture wounds received at the hands of the Nazis, allows a film crew to his castle to make a movie. Wih the cash, they give him, he uses an atomic reactor to, after killing him, turn a former servant into a reanimated monster. More murders follow.

This film is just flat, more soap opera and corny interludes from cliched characters -- film crew, Dr. Frankenstein's solemn colleague -- than terror. The monster is a huge letdown. It just has a box on its head with slits for eyes. Even Karloff isn't that good. His languid, tired appearance seems like he is just phoming in his performance. His salary -- $26,000, was more than a fifth of the entire budget. Despite the futuristic title, is never clear if it really is 1970. In fact, the film's settings look like its late-'50s timeframe.

The best scene is the opening scene, where a terrified young lovely is pursued to her doom by a monster in a lake. Unfortunately, a "director" yells cut and we learn that it's the movie company. That's about if fright-wise. The 83-minute feature also featured Norbert Schiller, Jana Lund, Donald "Red" Barry and Charlotte Austin. Watch it only for Karloff. Even at his most lackluster, he still has worth for cult films fans.

Review: Old Mother Riley Meets the Vampire

2009-06-26T22:18:00.000-07:00

By Doug Gibson

LUGOSI'S FINAL BRITISH FILM ... is NOT THAT GOOD ... BUT it's not as bad as many claim. In fact, it's the final film Bela Lugosi made where he looked healthy and in charge of the production. Its main weakness is that it's a unique bit of very low-brow British comedy that was popular from the 20s to the early 1950s. "Old Mother Riley" was an ugly, cockney, ignorant widow (played by actor Arthur Lucan in drag) who muddled herself into various ridiculous situations, dragging around her fatherless daughter, Kitty, played by Lucan's wife, Kitty McShane.

Lucan and McShane gained a reputation in music halls within the British provinces. They made a string of "Mother Riley" films that earned small profits in England but were not released in the U.S. By 1952, the series was about kaput, and Lucan and his wife were separated. Renown Pictures, which was producing Mother Riley films, noted the success of Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein, and used a Renown executive, Richard Gordon, to get Lugosi to make "Old Mother Riley Meets the Vampire." Gordon, a frend of Lugosi, had arranged a Dracula stage tour for Lugosi in England. For $5,000, Lugosi, well past his prime, was eager to make the film.

The plot involves Mother Riley getting her mail mixed up with a mad scientist named Von Housen (Lugosi) who thinks he's a vampire. Mother Riley gets a killer robot, Von Housen gets a bed warmer. Von Housen uses the robot to kidnap Mother Riley to his mad scientist house, with sinister servants and secret passageways, etc. Von Housen, delighted to find out Mother Riley has his favorite blood type, serves her lots of rare beef and liver. Von Housen, also seeking uranium to build more robots, has kidnapped a young lovely (Maria Mercedes) and her boyfriend. The girl's dad apparently knows where to find uranium, or something.

It's often not too clear because this movie is not really a Lugosi film. It's a showcase for Lucan's manic Mother Riley, with her rapid dialect that is hard for Americans to understand. Lugosi plays well in the film. As he did in every film, he gave it his all. Lucan's humor is very corny and not too funny. The final half of the film is comprised of Mother Riley trying to get the cops to believe her, a very unfunny battle with the robot, and a wild chase through London. As many critics have mentioned, "Old Mother Riley Meets the Vampire" fails because it makes the bad guys, the "monsters," look ridiculous. "Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein" succeeds because the monsters stay scary, and only the comedy stars do comedy. The director of the film was John Gilling, who later directed better films, including Hammer's "Plague of the Zombies." The role of a helpful maid, that might have gone to Lucan's estranged wife, Kitty McShane, was instead played by Dora Bryan, who later gained a measure of fame as a serious actress.

Gordon tried to pitch the film in the U.S. as "Vampire Over London," but there were no buyers. Lucan's Mother Riley comedy was too unique to British provinces for the U.S. market. Gordon considered taking out all Mother Riley scenes and shooting new scenes with Lugosi for a film called "King Robot," but Lugosi's soon-declining health killed that idea.

In the early 60s, it was eventually released as "My Son the Vampire," with comedy singer Allan Sherman singing a song with that nonsensical title in the opening credits. That version, which omits a dark Lugosi chuckle at the beginning as well as the actor's screen credit, is what is sold in the U.S. today and plays on Turner Classic Movies. The original British version, which might be interesting for Lugosi completists, can be purchased at AmazonUK as a Region 2 DVD. Sinister Cinema sells a print with the little-used "Vampire Over London" title. The credits at least include Lugosi's name, although there is no Lugosi chuckle.

A footnote: For many years a myth endured that Lugosi's 1952 British Dracula stage tour failed and the actor and his wife were left stranded and broke in London. The myth further states that he made "Old Mother Riley ..." just so he and his wife could have transportation fare to return home. That myth is still repeated in books and on Web sites. It's a fun tale but completely untrue. As authors Frank Dello Stritto and Andi Brooks recount in their book, "Vampire Over London," the Dracula tour provided steady work for Lugosi -- who enjoyed good reviews -- in England for several months. It played the English provinces and suburbs of London. Its only failing was that it was not of enough overall quality to make the West End, Britain's Broadway. The "Old Mother Riley" film was in fact a bonus for Lugosi, a nice windfall -- he and his wife had already earned enough money to easily make it back to the states.

Review: The Gold Raiders

2009-06-23T20:24:00.000-07:00

By Doug Gibson

"The Gold Raiders," 1951, B&W, 56 minutes, directed by Edward Bernds, starring George O'Brien as "George O'Brien," The Three Stooges, Moe Howard, Larry Fine and Shemp Howard, Lyle Talbot as Taggert, Sheila Ryan as Laura Mason and Clem Bevans as Doc Mason.

This "oater" is a curio, mainly because it features the Three Stooges in supporting roles. The very short B-film stars silent and early talkie cowboy film star George O'Brien as a lawman turned insurance man hired by mining companies to get their gold safely to the bank. Crime boss Lyle Talbot wants to steal the gold. He tries to get information on where the gold is being taken from a drunken old doctor (Bevans) who, with his stooped figure and drawling voice, is made for westerns.

The Three Stooges play bumbling peddlers who ally with O'Brien to keep the gold safe. Gold Raiders is an OK film. It's nothing special from the hundreds of other "oaters" made in Hollywood but an aging O'Brien does an OK job shooting and fighting. Talbot, who starred in Ed Wood films, is a good villain and the Stooges are funny.

Director Bernds, who helmed many Stooge shorts and later some features, told Cult Movies Magazine that Moe Howard was envious of Abbott and Costello and wanted to get into features. The result was Gold Raiders, an almost forgotten film today that was meant more as a comeback vehicle for O'Brien. Bernds recalled that the film was trashed by critics but, in my opinion, it really isn't too bad. Its main handicap is an abysmally low budget. It was shot in five days and looks it. One unintentionally funny scene includes a close-range shootout in a cramped saloon where almost no one seems to get shot. The film is also unique in that it may be the only western ever made where an insurance man is a two-fisted, gunslinging hero!

Despite the obscurity of Gold Raiders, the Stooges later made several features where they were the stars, including The Three Stooges Meet Hercules, Snow White and the Three Stooges and The Outlaws is Coming. Truth is, though, I enjoy the lean and mean Gold Raiders more than any of the later bigger-budget efforts. The Stooges are more effective as comedy relief, rather than the main components of a film

Notes: The makeup for Gold Raiders was done by Ed Wood regular Harry Thomas. Gold Raiders was released by United Artists but plans for a sequel with the Stooges and O'Brien were abandoned. The film was released to TV several years later and then sat for decades forgotten until 2006 when Warner Brothers released it on DVD. It can be bought via amazon.com

Review: The Big Noise

2009-06-21T16:19:00.000-07:00

The Big Noise

by Doug Gibson

"The Big Noise," a 1944 Laurel & Hardy feature from Twentieth Century Fox, directed by Malcolm St. Claire, is generally panned by Laurel and Hardy enthusiasts. In fact, it was listed as one of the "50 worst films" in the Medved brothers book that was popular 30 years ago. But that's all nonsense. "The Big Noise" is not a great film but it's a passable way to spend 74 minutes with a classic comedy team. It's certainly not among Laurel & Hardy's best films. To see those, buy the Hal Roach feature "Sons of the Desert" and the Roach short "The Music Box." But in "The Big Noise," the boys' genius still works at times.

The plot involves Stan and Ollie as bumbling janitors working in a private detective's office. A scientist named Alva Hartley (Arthur Space) calls the agency asking for detectives to guard his bomb, called the Big Noise. The bomb is so powerful it can win World War II for the allies (how prophetic!). L & H want to be detectives, so they pose as such and take on the assignment. Next door to the Hartley live a pack of criminals, who want to steal the bomb and sell it to the Nazis. Somehow a pretty young lady (Doris Merrick) is also there (she's innocent of the plot) and Hartley takes a small fancy to her.

Eventually Laurel and Hardy take off with the bomb with the crooks in hot pursuit. Incredibly, the whole shebang ends in the ocean!

This is just an OK film. L&H fans will be more tolerant. Those unaccustomed to the pair should watch a better entry. The boys were starting to age in 1944 and the physical hijinks suffered. There are funny scenes, though, of L&H trying to relax in a bedroom with beds that come out of the walls and tables that rise out of the floor. A scene where the pair eats food in pill form is flat and unfunny, though.

One scene that works is the pair trying to sleep in a Pullman train compartment. Another unfunny part of the film is an annoying brat in the Hartley house who plays pranks. He's played by child star Robert Blake, who later gained fame as an actor and then earned notoriety after being accused of murdering his wife (he was acquitted). Also, Veda Ann Borg overacts as a chunky matron who has eyes for Ollie. One trivia bit in the film is that Stan, on his accordion, played the popular song "Maisey Doats." According to the film's press book, the pair deliberately cut back on wasteful gags to help with the WWII effort.

To sum up, it's an OK way to kill 74 minutes and should be watched by completists, but there are better L&H outings. Again, though, it's not as bad as you might think.

Giant from the Unknown

2009-06-07T14:38:00.000-07:00

GIANT FROM THE UNKNOWN: A small movie with a big heart.

I can’t begin to tell you how much I love this film. I wish I had been alive in the 1950s to see it on the big drive-in movie screen. It may be small on budget and talent, but it makes up for it with big fun, excitement and eerie atmosphere. This may be director Richard Cunha’s best film. Cunha helmed such schlock drive-in masterpieces as: Missile To The Moon, She Demons and Frankenstein’s Daughter. His producer-partner, Arthur P. Jacobs, went on to bigger projects in producing the Planet of The Apes films. The working title for this film was: The Giant From Devil’s Crag.

Professional fighter Buddy Baer plays the giant murdering Spanish Conquistador, who is revived by lightning from his three hundred year grave to attack local natives and livestock in the small town of Pine Ridge, California. The opening sequence of this film is a bit confusing to me because it depicts the sheriff, played by cowboy serial star Bob Steele, and locals glancing at a corpse in the back of a pick-up truck. The locals comment that a monster is killing people and livestock in Pine Ridge. This sets up the idea that the giant is already on the loose and killing locals. However, it is not until much later in the film that we see the giant revived and crawling out of his grave as lightning strikes it. Does the giant return to his grave every evening after his killing sprees, or is he revived just this one time in the film? This is the confusion I have always had with the film. Nevertheless, I love it just the same.

Actor Ed Kemmer, star of TV’s Space Patrol, and pretty blonde actress Sally Fraser also star in the film. Both actors would team up once again for Bert I. Gordon’s The Earth vs. The Spider. Fraser also starred in Gordon’s War of The Colossal Beast, sequel to The Amazing Colossal Man.

It should also be noted that make-up genius Jack P. Pierce created and applied Buddy Baer’s Spanish Conquistador make-up for the film. Pierce is best known for his make-up work on Boris Karloff in the 1931 version of Frankenstein. It is unlikely that Giant From The Unknown ever appeared on Pierce’s resume. The real star of the film, however, is the eerie atmosphere and sense of isolation you feel when you view it. Giant From The Unknown is not to be missed by any fans of low-budget 1950s horror films. Don’t miss it! Don’t forget the popcorn!!

Steve D. Stones

Review: The Phantom Ship

2009-05-23T18:54:00.000-07:00

By Doug Gibson

This British 1936 film is a treat for Lugosi fans. He is Anton Lorenzen, a broken-down one-armed sailor who inspires a pity as part of the doomed crew of the Mary Celeste, a ship that in real life in the 1870s was discovered in the Atlantic sans crew.

This film, released in a much longer -- unfortunately lost -- version as The Mystery of the Mary Celeste in Britain, is an entertaining murder mystery. It sort of plays like a rough version of Agatha Christie.

The plot: A captain and his bride (Shirley Grey) set sail with a ragged, rough, sinister ship's crew, including Lugosi, who inspires pity. One by one people start to die. The captain and his wife disappear. Finally only Lugosi's Lorenzen and the sadistic first mate are left. At that point, Lugosi, acting like a 30s version of The Usual's Suspect's Keyser Soze, announces he is the killer, there to avenge a previous wrong. He kills off the first mate but then is hit by a beam of wood and falls into the sea to his death.

Before he dies, Lugosi brags of killing the capain and his wife. That scene appears clunky though. It almost sounds as if Lugosi's voice is dubbed. This is important because the ONLY remaining print is the 62-minute U.S. version, The Phantom Ship. The longer, lost 80-minute version, The Mystery of the Mary Celeste, apparently had an epilogue where the captain and his wife are discovered alive on an island, having escaped death on the Mary Celeste via a raft. It sure would be fun to locate a copy of the lost version. Lugosi biographer Frank Dello Stritto has located director Denison Clift's original shooting synopsis for the film and it includes the island epilogue.

Lugosi is great in The Phantom Ship, which used to be rare but in today's digital world can be found easily and in fact watched for free on the Net. He inspires pathos and pity and then effectively turns cold-blooded killer. He did this very well also in the 1930s The Black Cat, the Monogram Black Dragons and even Ed Wood's Bride of the Monster. Rest of cast is capable and the ship scenes are quite effective for the low budget. Definitely worth a buy. One of Lugois's best late 1930s films.

Review: Tower of London

2009-05-17T08:07:00.000-07:00

Wow, I absolutely love this low-budget 1962 gothic adaptation of Shakespeare (well, sort of) that stars Vincent Price as the mad wannabe king Richard who goes around slaughtering anyone who gets in his way, all the while dealing with those voices in his head and derisive laughter only he can hear.

It's directed by Roger Corman, who can stretch a budget as far as it can go without snapping. The black and white adds to the grim mood. There are some chilling scenes. A young maiden is tortured to death on a stretching rack. A man is murdered when a cage with a hungry rat is placed over his head. The scenes of a climatic battle that leads to Richard's death are from the 1939 Tower of London, a fine adaptation starring Boris Karloff.

I want to spend a little time on star Vincent Price's performance. A characteristic of Price's is he can be truly evil while keeping his tongue in his cheek. In Tower, he is clearly mad, and carries a confused, pained expression on his face. It's excellent acting. The audience almost wants to feel sorry for a suffering madman doomed to defeat, but he's simply too evil to care about.

A great film, easy to find on TV or buy. Also stars Michael Pate, Joan Freeman and Sandra Knight. It's fast-paced at 79 minutes.

-- Doug Gibson

The Unearthly

2009-05-10T16:47:00.001-07:00

The Unearthly, 1957, Director: Brooke L. Peters; Cast includes John Carradine, Tor Johnson, Allison Hayes, Myron Healey; About 75 minutes in most prints. *******1/2 out of 10 stars on the Schlock-Meter

The Unearthly boasts Ed Wood’s giant Tor Johnson among its cast, which automatically bumps it up a star or two on the Schlock-Meter. The tale is pretty standard fare for 1950s sci-fi/horror filmdom; Mad scientist John Carradine uses unsuspecting patients to try and graft on a “17th gland,” which the “good” doctor hopes will create eternal life. The problem is, all of the previous human guinea pigs he’s tried the gland procedure on have turned up mentally impaired and deformed. They exist -- a pretty motley bunch -- in the basement.

Pretty Allison Hayes is Carradine’s next intended victim, but she’s saved by Myron Healey, who plays an undercover cop who infiltrates Carradine’s sanitarium pretending to be a killer on the lam. Don’t you love these convoluted plots. Anyway, it’s up to Healey to save the day, since the patients of Carradine are too dense to realize that their ranks are shrinking rapidly.

Surprisingly, Carradine makes a pretty effective bad guy in this low-budget offer. He’s more subtle, resisting the urge to revert to his usual “over-the-top” overacting. The few times Carradine raises his voice in anger, his sinister side is effectively revealed. Tor Johnson, as Carradine’s hulking helper, is actually allowed a few lines of garbled dialogue. There are a few shots of Allison Hayes in a low cut nightgown, which must have a excited quite a few movie-going boys just entering puberty in 1957.

Some of the more glaring inconsistencies include: The sanitarium appears to be located in a secluded, out-of-the-way site, but it only takes the police a couple of minutes to arrive when called; none of the “patients” of Carradine’s doctor appear too concerned that Tor Johnson’s grotesque “Lobo” is on the staff; also, it’s amusing to see characters feign the effects of being shot in the stomach without any blood or bullet holes showing up.

The Unearthly is definitely worth a rental, if just to see one of the few films Tor Johnson made.

Review of What No Beer

2009-05-04T13:44:00.000-07:00

What! No Beer? 1933. B&W, MGM, 70 minutes. Directed by Edward Sedgwick. Starring Buster Keaton as Elmer J. Butts, Jimmy Durante as Jimmy Potts, Phyllis Barry as Hortense, Edward Brophy as Spike Moran and Charles Giblyn as Chief. Schlock-Meter rating: Four stars out of 10 stars.

What! No Beer? is a curio, a relic from the past. The plot of the mostly unfunny comedy deals with prohibition and efforts to repeal it, an issue which dominated headlines nearly 70 years ago. It was a box office winner due to its stars, Keaton and Durante, but is generally regarded as one of the unfunniest comedies of the 1930s. It was the pair's last film together. Keaton's drinking problem and absences from the set caused the studio to fire him even before the film was released. It was the start of a spiral into film oblivion for Keaton, and his career did not surge again until television began to thrive two decades later.

The plot: Jimmy Potts (Durante) is a barber and Elmer J. Butts (Keaton) is a luckless businessman. Potts, incorrectly thinking prohibition has been repealed, convinces Butts to invest his money in a long-closed brewery. The stone-faced Butts moons over a pretty gangster moll named Hortense (Barry). He wants to be a millionaire so he can win her love. Seeing no other way to earn the million bucks, he agrees to get into the beer business. Police quickly raid the brewery and arrest the pair, but discover there's no alcohol in the brew. Later, a hobo at the deserted plant confesses he was once a great brewer and real beer is made, which is a big hit. Soon the police and the mob muscle in on Potts and Butts.

The film is as unfunny as it sounds. Durante, in particular, is just pathetic. He bellows and brays and cracks unfunny jokes. It's painful to watch him flop on the screen. Although he is clearly half-bagged in many of the scenes, the best part of the film is comic great Keaton. His talent for physical comedy is on display in several scenes, and his naivete and trusting demeanor leads to misunderstandings that bring laughs, particularly a scene where gangsters, sent to muscle him, interpret his bland replies as extreme coolness under pressure, and leave impressed. What! No Beer? is not a good movie, but it's worth a rental to see an early sound Keaton offering.

-- Doug Gibson

Review of The Flying Serpent

2009-04-23T22:28:00.000-07:00

Listen, I'm a big George Zucco fan, I love the old Producers Releasing Corporation 40s C-movies but the 1946 The Flying Serpent is not one of the better offerings. Zucco plays a mad archaeologist who uses a live big flying creature to kill his enemies. The "flying serpent" is a stiff stage prop and if you look hard you can see the strings.

Naturally, Zucco gets it in the end from his dangerous bird. In theme the film is very similar to the far superior 1940 PRC release The Devil Bat, starring Lugosi. There's a big killer controlled by a bitter man of science. An investigative journalist helps solve the crime and protects a young lovely. Also, the music is the same as Devil Bat, and a lot of other C-films of that era, and the film uses "banner headlines" like Devil Bat and others to bridge plot. There's comic bits to relieve the "tension."

But while that plot worked in Devil Bat it doesn't work here. The scenes with the crusading radio reporter (Ralph Lewis) are very dull and slow down the main action of Zucco getting revenge. By contrast, crusading newspaper reporter Dave O'Brien is outstanding combating Lugosi in Devil Bat. Flying Serpent is a tight, very low budget film that runs 59 minutes. It was directed by Sam Newfield and also starred Mary Forbes.

It's worth watching -- anything with Zucco is but it's not up to par with other PRC offerings such as Devil Bat and Strangler of the Swamp.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Outlaw Riders

2009-04-13T21:31:00.001-07:00

OUTLAW RIDERS, 1971

"Outlaw Riders" is a 1971 film that belongs in a time capsule marked Hollywood 1970s derivatve biker film. It was produced by Tony Cardoza, who gave us "The Beast of Yucca Flats" and it's a low-budget mix of "Easy Rider" and "Born Losers." It's a motorcycle gang/hippy cliche-fest. The riders spout words like"split," "make the scene," "fuzz," "crash" etc.

Plot involves an outlaw motorcycle gang headed by two couples (Bambi Allan, Jennifer Bishop, Bill Bonner and Bryan West). The gang is badly hurt by a botched robbery and the four stars, the only survivors, eventually head to Mexico, where they have to combat a gang run by a sadistic Mexican (Rafael Campos). Campos is the only "name star" in the film, although he was far away from his better days in "West Side Story."

I like this film for all its low-budget shortcomings. The mostly outdoor American West setting with long dusty cycle treks give it a nostalgic, time-capsule feeling. Cult film fans will enjoy the short cameo from Ed Wood star Valda Hansen as a nun who treats one of the injured bandits. Rumor as it that Hansen was a paramour of producer Cardoza. Film has the same type of downbeat ending as "Easy Rider."

I have no idea what exposure or success "Outlaw Riders" had in 1971. The color, 86-minute Tony Huston-directed film has a lot of violence but little sex, which might have cut down on its grindhouse potential. It's fairly hard to find today, but not impossible. My video copy is in great shape. It would make a nice DVD offering for a multi-disc set of biker films.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The Great Brain

2009-03-31T15:26:00.000-07:00

The Great Brain, 1978, starring Jimmy Osmond.

This isn't a great movie, by any stretch. The acting is hammy, and a very young Jimmy Osmond is frankly, too inexperienced, in my opinion, to play The Great Brain. But if you like the John D. Fitzgerald novels, you'll find the film a treat.
I'm glad it's out and that I taped it in the early 1980s. It's a definite G and post-toddler kids will like it. However, those adults unfamiliar with the Great Brain character may get bored at the juvenile story.
On the plus side, the sets of early, rural Utah are pretty well done and the cast, if inexperienced, is at least earnest. Also, this is a rare film that is almost completely faithful to a book. Fans of The Great Brain will enjoy seeing what they read faithfully adapted to the screen. Examples include The Great Brain, Tom D. Fitzgerald, having adventures with a Greek immigrant family, his fights with friends, his scheming with brothers, including narrator John D. Fitzgerald, and his change of heart when he helps a young crippled boy.
This is an almost impossible film to locate. It never runs on TV it seems and has never been released to video or DVD. Rumor has it the film is locked in litigation. That's a shame if true, because it seems ideal for a new production or a re-release via DVD to at least the Utah/Mormon market.
Still, if you love the John D. Fitzgerald, you'll want to hunt old family tapes off TV to see if you have this in the basement. The film was directed by Sidney Levin. It also starred Pat Delaney, Fran Ryan and Cliff Osmond.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: TAGS: "Christmas Story"

2009-03-26T20:25:00.000-07:00

Here's another recap/review of a great Andy griffith Show episode. From Season 1, "The Christmas Story."
By Doug Gibson
The Andy Griffith Show, Season 1, Episode 11, "The Christmas Story." Starring Andy Griffith, Don Knotts Ron Howard, Frances Bavier and Elinor Donahue. Guest starring Sam Edwards, Margaret Kerry and Joy Ellison as Sam, Bess and Effie Muggins, Will Wright as Ben Weaver.
Most successful TV situation comedies tend to have a Christmas episode and for some reason they are often produced in the first season: think "Mary Tyler Moore Show, "The Odd Couple" and "Happy Days." TAGS was no exception producing its Christmas-themed show in the 11th episode. It's a well-paced, funny, heartwarming tale that features Ben Weaver, Mayberry's most prominent merchant, a crochety, stooped-shouldered somewhat Dickensian figure with a well-hidden heart of gold tucked behind his gruff exterior.
The plot involves Weaver (Will Wright) dragging in moonshiner Sam Edwards to the courthouse on Christmas Eve and demanding that Edwards be locked up. A big Christmas party is being planned and Andy asks Ben if he'll let Edwards have a furlough through Christmas. True to form Weaver refuses. It looks like the Christmas Party is off, until Andy invites Edwards wife, Bess, (Kerry), and daughter, Effie, (Ellison), to stay in the jail with dad. In a funny scene, Andy overrides Ben's objections by cross-examing Sam's smiling kin, who admit they knew about the moonshining!
The funny plot seamlessly turns serious as a lonely Weaver, his Grinch-like plans foiled, tries to get himself arrested. Writer Frank Tarloff -- who penned 9 TAGS episodes -- deserves a tip of the hat for his funny, ironic script. Ben's plans to get busted are foiled when party-goers, including Ellie, either pay his fines or donate "stolen property" to him. Finally, in a scene that can bring tears, we see a lonely Ben Weaver, standing in an alley, peeking through the jail window bars, softly singing along with a Christmas Carol sung in the courthouse.
I won't give way the end for the very few who might still have missed the show, but it should be noted that perhaps the reason TAGS never again attempted a Christmas episode is that it could never have topped this. Wright as Ben Weaver is simply magnificent. His page on IMDB.com says he looks as "if he was born old." The grizzled, stooped ex-Western actor actually died at the relatively young age of 68. He played Ben Weaver in three TAGS episodes, the last before his death of cancer. Several other actors played Weaver in later episodes, but only one, Tol Avery, captured even a smidgen of the cranky magic Wright gave the role. He was, and remains, Mayberry merchant Ben Weaver to TAGS fans. In his three episodes, Weaver created a happy Christmas, saved a family from homelessness and gave a tired traveling merchant a job.
Notes: "Family members" Edwards, Kerry and Ellison were the same family Wright's Weaver threatened with eviction in another TAGS episodes. They were the Scobees. Knotts' Fife played Santa Claus, in full costume and "ho ho hos." Donahue's Walker sang "Away in the Manger." Season 1 was a little uneven, with the cast developing their roles. Knotts was still being too often used only for manic comic relief. Taylor's Andy was still the impetus for most humor. In the second season Sheriff Taylor would began to react to the humorous situations of others, and the show would move to its current classic status as a result.

Review: TAGS: "Family Visit"

2009-03-23T16:08:00.000-07:00

Here at Plan 9 Crunch, we are fans of The Andy Griffith Show. Here's a review of the TAGS episode "Family Visit."

The Andy Griffith Show, Season 5, Episode 3, "The Family Visit." Starring Andy Griffith, Ron Howard, Frances Bavier. Guest starring James Westerfield and Maudie Prickett as Uncle Ollie and Aunt Nora.

As TAGS afficionados know, Don Knotts needed a few breaks a year from TAGS duties. Oftentimes, the Barney-less episodes lack the manic comic punch Knotts offered, but it often allowed others to shine. A good example is Frances Bavier's blend of comedy and pathos in "The Bed Jacket." Another Barney-less gem is "The Family Visit," which first aired Oct. 5, 1964. (It must be wonderful to be a TAGS fan who saw these episodes premier)

The episode starts with an enjoyable Taylors-on-the-Front-Porch scene where the family relaxing, is greeting other families on their way to preaching and spending time with relaxed chatter. Aunt Bee's observations about several generations of Beamers walking to church leads to reminiscing about their own relatives, and why they don't see them more often. It is finally decided to invite Uncle Ollie and Aunt Nora and their two boys for a weekend in Mayberry.

Once Uncle Ollie and Aunt Nora arrive, the comedy conflict arises. As the Taylors learn, our memories favor the positive, not the negatives. Ollie and Nora are nice folks, but a fussy, middle-aged pair who like to bicker. Their sons tussle with Opie. Nora wants to set Andy up with a "skinny widow with a bakery truck" -- "with the original paint," Ollie chimes in. Ollie, bless his heart, is an impulsive blowhard and house messer-upper. He also dreams he's riding a bike, as bedmate Andy discovers. In short, after a couple of days with Aunt and Uncle and the boys, the Taylors have had their fill of a family visit. Of course, that's when Ollie and Nora decide to extend the trip for a week. Andy finally gets rid of the family by calling a reckless bluff Ollie made earlier. There is a fun epilogue where Andy gives Aunt Bee an incredulous look when she pines to have Ollie, Nora and the boys back soon.

As always, Griffith, Bavier and Howard are good but the success of "Family Visit" must go to ubiquitious character actors and TV comedians James Westerfield and Maudie Prickett. Both were fixtures in mid-century TV and film and their comic timimg as a long-married, squabbling couple is perfect. Some of their best scenes include Nora forcing a busy Andy on the phone with "the skinny widow" and Ollie bullying a meek traffic violator. Westerfield and Prickett's squabbling over "Ollie always forgetting" is also classic TV comedy. Westerfield and Prickett's Ollie and Nora characters were, frankly, good enough to become regulars on TAGS or as a spinoff TV sitcom.

Notes: Westerfield played the character of "Big Mac" in the classic 50s film "On the Waterfront." He was in dozens of TV shows, including Mayberry RFD, and a fixture in westerns. Prickett later played an occasional roles as Mrs Larch in TAGS. She was also in Mayberry RFD and Gomer Pyle USMC and Bewitched and Dragnet. Uncredited roles included "The Music Man" and "North by Northwest."

-- Doug Gibson

More on Dead Men Walk

2009-03-19T18:04:00.000-07:00

By Doug Gibson

Dead Men Walk, 1943, B&W, 64 minutes. Producers Releasing Corp. Directed by Sam Newfield. Starring George Zucco as Dr. Lloyd Clayton and Elwyn Clayton, Mary Carlisle as Gayle Clayton, Nedrick Young as Dr. David Bentley, Dwight Frye as Zolarr, Fern Emmett as Kate and Hal Price as the sheriff. Schlock-meter rating: Six stars out of 10.

This 1940s PRC cheapie about a vampire who rises from the grave and attempts to destroy his niece to spite his brother is a lot of fun. It stars horror great Zucco in dual roles; as ocultist brother Elwyn who is murdered by his good brother, a doctor named Lloyd, also played by Zucco.

Alas, the evil Elwyn's death fails. Elwyn has learned how to resurrect himself as a vampire. With the help of demented servant Zolarr (Frye in a great, meaty role), he begins to murder. A woman driven crazy by grief (Emmett) suspects him, but no one takes her seriously. Once she starts to gain credibility, she is killed off by Zolarr. Elywn's chief target, however, is revenge against his brother. He appears to the startled doctor, and promises to suck the lifeblood from his beautiful niece Gayle (Carlisle). She's engaged to another doctor (Young) who, as Gayle starts to wither away, begins to suspect Lloyd of trying to kill her.

There are rumors all over town that Lloyd killed Elwyn and the townspeople, spurred by the murders, start to talk vigilantism. The sheriff blusters a lot, but accomplishes little. Eventually, there is a showdown between the undead Elwyn and brother Lloyd.The low budget, of course seriously hampers the film. The FXs are virtually non-existent. Zucco's Elwyn seems to fade away rather than pass through walls. The lighting is very poor. The script weak. Many of the characters are stereotypes. There's the rich doctor, the rich young couple, the crazy old lady, the blustery sheriff, the very superstitious townspeople.

The acting, except for Zucco and Frye, is quite poor. The direction, by cheapie legend, Newfield, is pedestrian. However, the plot is quite unique for a vampire film of that era. Film writer Frank Dello Stritto, writing in Cult Movies 27, describes Dead Men Walk as the best plotted vampire film of that era. However, Dello Stritto agrees the finished product is mediocre.

Nevertheless, Zucco is magnificent. The doctors are not cast as twins. It's amazing how different Zucco appears as the respected Dr. Lloyd Clayton and the balding, gaunt brother Elwyn. His timing and delivery is first rate. Frye's Zucco is menacing, and watching it is bittersweet, since the talented horror star died of a heart attack a few months after completing the film. Students of the early horror films, particulary Poverty Row Bs, should own Dead Men Walk. It's easily available on VHS or DVD.

"Dead Men Walk" is on UEN's Sci Fri Friday on March 20 at 9 p.m. on Channel 9 in Utah. Here is an essay from UEN on the film. It's a wonderful example of a low-budget 40s C horror film with stars (Zucco and Frye) that elevate the film beyond its low-budget production values.

END OF DOUG GIBSON'S ARTICLE

Here is the UEN information: http://www.uen.org/News/article.cgi?category_id=340&article_id=2348

When your twin brother is way into the dark arts, do you really want him dead?
The 1943 gem, "Dead Men Walk", features not one, but two (!) performances by George Zucco. As Dr. Lloyd Clayton, he's a kindly uncle and caring village doctor. As Lloyd's evil twin, Elwyn, he's a Satan-worshipping, vampiric goon bent on revenge against the gentle brother who shoved him off a cliff in an attempt to stop him.

It's worth noting that Elwyn learned the skills he needed to become a vampire on a trip to India. Western interpretations of vampire lore generally rely on ideas developed by authors such as Sheridan Le Fanu and Bram Stoker, who found inspiration in the historical figure Vlad (The Impaler) Draculea. But vampires lived in legend long before Bram first put pen to paper and even before Vlad first put stake through victim.

Many discussions of Indian vampires begin with Kali, a complex Hindu goddess typically associated with death and destruction. When confronted with a demon that replicated from his own spilled blood, she solved the problem by drinking him dry. But this isn't exactly what most of us think of when we think "vampire." Not to fear: Indian lore offers a rich variety of true demonic-style vampire types that range from Brahmaparusha and Pacu Pati to Rakshasha and Baital, each of which have different origins and powers.

Anyone interested in ancient vampire lore would do well to check out the Indian story Baital Pachisi, a.k.a. Vetala Panchvimshati. First written in Sanskrit, this well-known classic is an early example of a frame story, one that places multiple tales within an overall narrative. In the frame for Baital Pachisi, the hero Vikrim pledges to present a sorcerer with a Baital – a vampire spirit who inhabits a human corpse at a cemetery. The Baital agrees to let Vikrim carry him to the sorcerer on the condition that the man doesn't speak until the journey is done, but as Vikrim lugs the weighty Baital down the road, the vampire tells him a story that provokes a response. Baital flies back to the cemetery and Vikram gets to try 24 more times, hearing a fresh tale every time. According to scholars, the original tale had a profound influence on European literature and contributed to Western frame stories such as Boccaccio's Decameron and Chaucer's Canterbury Tales. An English translation of 11 of the tales first appeared in 1870 under the title Vikram and the Vampire, by Sir Richard Francis and Isabel Burton. Numerous editions are available today, including e-books and paperbacks issued as recently as 2008.

More on the Ape Man

2009-03-16T18:24:00.000-07:00

The Ape Man, 64 minutes, 1943, Monogram, Directed by William Beaudine. Starring Bela Lugosi as Dr. James Brewster, Louise Currie as Billie Mason, Wallace Ford as Jeff Carter, Henry Hall as Dr. George Randall, Emil Van Horn as the ape, J. Farrell McDonald as Police Captain O'Brien and Minerva Urecal as Agatha Brewster. Schlock-meter rating: Seven stars out of 10.

This is a screwball horror film, but a lot more entertaining than most viewers will expect. It's sheer pulp horror that doesn't take itself too seriously. The plot involves a scientist (Lugosi) who for unexplained reasons accidentally turns himself into an ape man. Not trusting his sanity, he frequently locks himself up with an ill-tempered ape (Van Horn in a campy performance). Lugosi's ape man needs human spinal fluid to have even a chance to regain his former appearance and posture. This involves murder and when a colleague (Hall) refuses to help, Lugosi literally goes ape, and commits several murders. He's encouraged by his creepy sister (Urecal) a noted spiritualist who records the groans of ghosts. Lugosi's nemesis are a reporter/photographer duo who soon become wise to all the creepy occurrences.

Of such bizarre plots were Monogram cheapies of the 1940s created. It's a lot of fun to watch, even if the production values are predictably bottom of the barrel. Lugosi, as usual, acts far above the product he's pitching, and he manages to make the audience feel sympathy for his plight. His ferocious temper tantrums are effective. He nearly strangles his sister in one scene. Urecal, by the way, is great as the slightly creepy sister. In an Los Angeles Times review (the paper actually liked the film) the reviewer suggested Urecal be given her own horror film to star in. So far as I know, it never happened, although she was also very good in the Lugosi vehicle The Corpse Vanishes. Currie and Ford as the wisecracking journalists have strong chemistry. B movie veteran actor McDonald is also an asset to the film. The film is slightly marred by a truly goofy character who acts as a red herring, cutting into scenes for no reason and offering cryptic comments and warnings. At the end, he reveals himself to be the author of the tale. As The End is flashed on the screen, he remarks "Screwy, isn't it?"

Like any low-budget film, there are amusing contradictions. Why does Lugosi have an accent, and his sister doesn't? Also, why doesn't anyone seem to notice the ape-like Lugosi and his pet ape traipsing through the city? Of course, suspension of disbelief is a requirement to fully enjoy a Monogram film. So just sit back and take in the show. It's a fun hour of escapism and a great treat for those who enjoy the old C and B horror films. Notes: The film's shooting title was They Creep in the Night. In England, it was titled Lock Your Doors. There is a nostalgic reference to the times when Currie chides Ford for being 4F, and consequently not serving in World War II. He retorts that he's scheduled to enlist at the end.

The Ape Man plays often on UEN's (Utah Educational Network) Sci Fi Friday and has a podcast to go along with it. There are many versions of the film. It is free to watch on the Web. Hopefully, Turner Classic Movies will air a pristine print of the film some day.

Another Review: Lords of Magick

2009-03-12T21:23:00.000-07:00

LORDS OF MAGIC: Pimple cream not required

By Steve D. Stones

I have to admit that I was a bit hesitant to want to view this film. The artwork on the video box reminded me of all the geeks I knew in High School who spent their free time playing Dungeons & Dragons board games and coating their faces with pimple cream.
As a fan of “cult films,” I find that it is necessary to keep an open mind to all forms of cinema, regardless of whether or not the genre appeals to me. My second viewing of the film proved to be a much more rewarding experience. An evil sorcerer kidnaps a beautiful princess named Lina. Two Merlin Wizard brothers named Michael and Ulric Redglen are on a quest to save the princess. The two are captured by Knights in a tavern and are brought before the king to stand trial for necromancy.
The king eventually sets them free to continue their pursuit in finding the princess. In the forest, the Redglen brothers encounter a hanging corpse. After using necromancy to revive the corpse, he tells them to go to the altar of the skulls to meet the evil sorcerer Salatin. There they urinate on his altar, which infuriates the sorcerer. They demand the release of the princess. Lord Merlin soon appears and tells them to go fourth some 1,000 years into the future to battle Salatin and find the princess.
Their journey takes them to modern 1980s Hollywood, California. Although Hollywood is full of weirdos, dropouts and dead beats, the locals find the two brothers to be very strange as they wonder through the town. They think the Hollywood buildings are castles. A cop approaches them and demands they surrender their swords. Ulric fights one of the officers. Both brothers are arrested and forcibly put in the police car, but magically escape soon after.
Continuing their journey through Hollywood, the brothers find a poster advertising a theatrical production of The Princess and The Pea. Here they hope to find the princess. Entering the theater, they fit right in with the crowd dressed in medieval costumes. Outside the theater they encounter a woman who they think is the princess. A gang attacks them, thinking they are raping and kidnapping the woman. One of the gang appears to be adult film star Ron Jeremy. After reading Sherman Hirsh’s write up on this film, he confirmed for me that one of the gang members is indeed Ron Jeremy. I’m just glad I wasn’t on the set the day Ron decided to hang out in his underwear. The title of the movie would have to be changed to “Lords of Regurgitation,” if you know what I mean?
While battling the street gang, Michael recites a chant as a young man looks out on the street from his apartment window reciting the same chant. The chant transports Michael and Ulric to his apartment. Here they meet Thomas and ask for his help in battling Salatin. Thomas’ girlfriend does not believe that Michael and Ulric are wizards. Thomas takes the Redglen brothers to an address with the number 666 on the mailbox. They enter an old dark house filled with cobwebs and dust.
Michael and Ulric leave the room in search of The Chamber of Love while Thomas stays behind. A corpse rises out of a coffin with glowing red eyes. All three men eventually find Salatin holding the princess captive in a trance. Ulric breaks the spell of the trance. He realizes she is the real princess from a mark on her chest. The group flees the house and returns back to Thomas’ apartment. Here Ron Jeremy and his street gang attack them again. The gang is now possessed by the power of Salatin.
After defeating the gang, the Redglen brothers ask Thomas for candles, salt and chalk. They create a chalk outline barrier on the floor to protect the princess from the evil of Salatin. Thomas and Michael go to a local library to find a book written by Michael a thousand years ago. The librarian refuses to allow them access to a vault in the basement of the library, so the two carefully break into the vault to find the book. The librarian catches them and transforms into an evil demon.
Meanwhile, Ulric approaches a prostitute in Hollywood, and pays her with a gold coin for her services. While in the hotel room with the girl, he encounters Salatin in the bathroom mirror. Salatin convinces Ulric to betray his brother Michael by fornicating with the prostitute. He is now possessed by the evil Salatin, and kills the prostitute before leaving the hotel room.
Leaving the library, Michael and Thomas go to a gypsy named Esmeralda to ask for her aide in locating Salatin. She finds him in her crystal ball. This is one of my favorite scenes in the film because some of the special effects in the scene are quite intriguing. The skull and Buddha on the shelf in Esmeralda’s room move around and laugh. Ulric returns to Thomas’ apartment to lure the princess out of the chalk circle. She is led out of the circle and into the presence of Salatin.
Michael and Thomas soon find Salatin in a warehouse and discover that Ulric has betrayed them. Michael challenges Salatin to a duel. An armyof zombies is ordered to attack Michael and Thomas. The two escape the zombies with the princess through an opening in the warehouse wall. Both Thomas and Michael use their sorcery to destroy Salatin. With the death of Salatin comes the death of Ulric.
Michael then takes the princess back to his own time. Michael asks permission of his father to resurrect Ulric from the dead. His father must confront the archbishop for permission. The film ends with the princess delivering a message from Michael’s father, informing him that he is now a nobleman, and can now marry the princess.
This film is proof that you can’t always judge a film in its first viewing, or even by the video box art. I have a greater appreciation for it now that I have viewed it a few times and read Sherman Hirsh’s writeup on the film (found on this website.).
Making a movie is not an easy task, so we always need to keep an open mind when we sit down to watch someone’s hard work, even if it is just “Cable Fodder,” to use Sherman’s word. Forget the pimple cream when you watch Lords of Magic.

Review: Lords of Magick

2009-03-11T16:36:00.000-07:00

You can see this also at Plan 9 Crunch main blog, where there's a long interesting essay on Lords of Magick from writer Sherman Hirsh

LORDS OF MAGICK, a short review

by Doug Gibson

I enjoy this film, obviously, or we wouldn't be featuring it. It is hampered by inexperienced acting, now-cliched 80s Los Angeles settings and fashions (I agree with Sherman that it should have been set in long ago times the whole film) and the early shot-on-video look is a tad uncomfortable to watch. I can't really explain why, it just doesn't feel right.

Having said that, Lords of Magick is a fun tale. Its strength is it simplicity. As written by Sherman, two noble young brothers who are wizards rescue a beautiful princess from an evil sorcerer. What could be plainer. Jarrett Parker and Mark Gauthier work well together as Michael and Ulric Redglen. Ruth Zakarian makes a beautiful Princess Luna. The shots of hanged men, zombies and a possessed librarian are well done given the budget. The 80s gang members seem like they might have stepped out a Police Academy film, but I love the scene where the Redglen brothers use magic to escape two thuggish LA cops.

The zombie swordfights are a lot of fun. My favorite scene is the library and the possession that ensues. The final conflict is cramped but still exciting. The low budget synthetic electronic flashes look cool. There are places that drag, I personally would have trimmed about 8 to 18 minutes from the film. But Lords of Magick keeps my interest. Again, that is due to the overall simplicity and respect for the genre that is in the script.

Sherman Hirsh talks about a resemblance to Ghostbusters. I have to say that watching Ulric and Michael strolling down Hollywood I was thinking "Beverly Hills Cop" for a few seconds. Maybe it was the music??

I hope these extended 20 minutes of notice for Lords of Magick will spur a few sales via ebay, etc. It's a fun film, an earnest attempt to capture an era that will fascinate us forever.

Review: Werewolf of London

2009-03-06T21:24:00.000-08:00

Werewolf of London, 1935, 75 minutes, Universal, black and white. Directed by Stuart Walker. Starring Henry Hull as Dr. Wilfred Glendon, Warner Oland as Dr. Yogami, Valerie Hobson as Mrs. Lisa Glendon, Lester Matthews as Capt. Paul Ames, and Lawrence Grant as Sir. Thomas Forsythe, Scotland Yard chief. Schlock-Meter rating: 8 stars out of 10.

The Werewolf of London, which pre-dates Lon Chaney Jr.'s The Wolfman by several years, drips in atmosphere. There's foggy London nights, remote Tibetan valleys and sinister chilly nights in deserted country homes. It's the tale of a London botanist (Hull) who travels to Tibet to find a rare flower which blooms when the moon shines. Also, legend has it that it serves as an antidote to lycanthropy, or literally, becoming a werewolf. In Tibet, Hull is attacked by a werewolf, and while fighting him off, is bitten on the arm. He returns to London with the flower.

Once in London, the workaholic Hull is visited by an Oriental colleague (Oland) who asks for the flower to help patients, or so he claims. Oland, who carries a charmingly sinister persona, hints that he was the werewolf Hull fought off in Tibet. Meanwhile, Hull's Dr. Glendon, much to his surprise and horror, become a werewolf. The transformation leaves him evil, and he kills several women when the moon is full. An old beau (Matthews) of Glendon's neglected wife Lisa (Hobson), visits the community and begins to suspect Hull.

This film is not too scary, but it's still very well made and very entertaining. Hull is a bit too skinny to inspire much fear and his werewolf is not too threatening or awful in appearance. In fact, the werewolves in this film aren't much stronger than the women they attack. Nevertheless, Hull's feelings of horror and helplessness at what has happened to him create strong pathos. In a particularly emotional scene Hull, desperately prays to God to spare him the werewolf curse. Then, he adds a final prayer, asking that at least he be spared of killing his wife if he be so cursed. In a way, Hull's dilemma is similar to John Abbott's in The Vampire's Ghost (Republic, 1945). They are reluctant monsters!

There are a few silly scenes of stereotypical neighbors and party guests who distract from the plot, and another subplot where the hero Matthews makes a play for Hull's wife, Lisa. But star Hull, despite his physical limitations, does a better-than-average job, and Oland also contributes to the fun. The music is splendid, and was copied in many other horror films of that era. The method of Hull's "werewolfism" is a flower plant. That was certainly changed by the time Chaney Jr. became the wolfman. Werewolf of London was a box-office flop for Universal, and that ended Hull's bid for horror star status. Still, the film holds up well today. Catch it when you can on Turner Classic Movies or you can buy it fairly cheap.

Review: Black Sunday

2009-03-03T21:24:00.000-08:00

By Doug Gibson

Black Sunday, 1960, Italy, 83 minutes, B&W. Directed by Mario Bava. Starring Barbara Steele as Princess Asa Vajda/Katia Vajda, John Richardson as Dr. Adrej Gorobec, Andrea Checchi as Dr. Tomas Kruvajan, Arturo Dominici as Javutich, Ivo Garrani as Prince Vajda. Released in the U.S. by American International Pictures. Schlock-Meter rating: 9 1/2 stars out of 10.

Black Sunday drips in atmosphere, creating a dark, brooding tale of slain advocates of Satan rising from the grave 200 years after being executed in Moldavia and trying to exact revenge on their descendants. Director Bava uses images, sounds and nature to exact mood from his first (and some argue best) chiller. Cobwebs, dark shadows, fog, hanging branches, dense forests, decaying graves, spiked masks being driven into faces, a decayed face infested by bugs, stakes being driven in eyes, death by fire, dark nights with sound trailing away, and always the wind blowing ominously in the background, exploit our senses while watching Black Sunday.

Another example: Bava manages to produce chills by shooting a horse carriage in slow motion and soft focus. It creates a ghostly image. Later, after a hapless doctor is carried in the carriage, it rides faster than is humanly possible, adding a contrast just as creepy as the first glimpse of the carriage.

The plot involves a beautiful princess/witch named Asa (Steele), and her demonic assistant, Javutich (Dominici), who are executed early in the 17th century. Asa utters a curse against her brother (who is overseeing the execution) and his family. Asa and Javutich are executed by having iron, spiked “masks of Satan” driven into their face, a striking image. They are set to be burned, but heavy rain prevents that, and instead Asa is put in a crypt, and Javutich buried.Two hundred years later, and Asa’s descendants still live on the land. They are a depressed, but still noble lot: Prince Vajda, his son Constantin and beautiful daughter Katia (Steele) who looks just like Asa. The Prince is worried, because it’s Black Sunday, the one day where evil spirits are allowed a chance to wreck havoc. He fears Asa and Javutich will try to avenge themselves on his family. As the plot unfolds, he has good reason to be worried.

Two doctors, one old (Checchi), one young (Richardson) are sidetracked on a journey to a medical convention when their carriage breaks down. They stumble upon the crypt with Asa in it, and the skeptical Checchi tears off her mask, revealing a rotted face infested with bugs. A bat attacks the doctor. Before killing it, he cuts his hand, dripping blood into Asa’s face. That revives her, and she calls Javutich from the grave. The pair then plot the death of the noble family, and Asa is determined to possess Katia’s youth.

This film -- with its gruesome images and tale of disciples of Satan rising from the dead -- must have been quite daring for 1960s audiences. There are still scenes that shock. A couple include Javutich rising from his grave, and a resurrected Asa’s cloak being torn from her body, revealing a decaying skeleton underneath. I was chilled by the scene where Katia’s father, possessed by Satan, matter-of-factly tells her that her being his daughter is of no relevance any more, and his only desire now is to eat her blood! Also, despite that much of the last half of the film takes place in the Vajda castle, Bava doesn’t neglect the countryside or its inhabitants. There are scenes of locals in an inn and another creepily amusing scene of a teenage girl milking a cow. In the final scene, hundreds of locals in pursuit of Asa are led by a priest.

This version is the U.S. American International Pictures release, which reportedly is inferior to the European release. Also, the dubbing by most of the cast is flat and annoying at times. I would love to see the uncut Italian version with English subtitles. Also, the plot development appears a bit thinner in the U.S. version, and some shock scenes last only a split second, which means perhaps AIP censors trimmed the violence and gore a little. Nevertheless, Black Sunday -- in any version -- is an above-average shocker that deserves its cult status.

Black Sunday is a masterpiece. It kicked off a stellar career for Bava, who would later show how well he could use color to invoke terror in audiences. There is a long, interesting essay on Black Sunday in Danny Peary's first volumn "Cult Films."

Review: The Vampire's Ghost

2009-03-01T18:21:00.001-08:00

By Doug Gibson

This is an interesting 1945 vampire tale, only 59 minutes, from Republic Pictures. It's semi-obscure and few retailers carry it (I've been waiting years to catch it on Turner Classic Movies) but it's just interesting enough to have a chapter in McFarland's "Son of Guilty Pleasures of the Horror Film" and Frank Dello Stritto gives it a couple of pages in his collection of essays "A Curious Volume of Forgotten Lore."

Plot involves saloonkeeper Webb Fallon, a haggard-looking white man with impeccable manners, who runs a small saloon in an African port. There have been vampire attacks on the natives, and they are getting restless. They speak the language of drums, and the drums spell Fallon (John Abbott) as their chief suspect.

They are right of course. Fallon is a vampire, centuries old and very tired. He bemoans his fate but also accepts it with chilling simplicity. When he sets his sights on the pretty fiance of a young Englishman, it looks as if nothing can stop him.

What makes The Vampire's Ghost so interesting is that it deviates from the standard vampire plot made famous by Bela Lugosi. Vampire Fallon can move around in the light and sleeps in a bed with native soil from his grave by the bed.

As mentioned, he's sympathetic early but Webb is able to give his vampire a sort of polite heartlessness that underscores the undead sociopath that lies beneath his gentleman English exterior. In one scene, Fallon ruthlessly and quickly dispatches a boat captain and saloon dancer who have cheated him at cards. He also plays with the boyfriend (Charles Grodin) who knows that Fallon wants his fiance (Peggy Stewart). Fallon the vampire seems detached, as if he is repeating a game he has played many times before. He relies on sapping the inner strength of his potential victims. The languid, remote location of his life (Africa) underscores his soft deadly power.

If you can find this film, it's worth a buy, particularly if you enjoy the changing genres of vampire film. Surprisingly, in its own quiet way, The Vampire's Ghost predates Twilight.

Notes: The Vampires Ghost was written by Leigh Brackett, who wrote Star Wars 5: The Empire Strikes Back. Roy Barcroft, who played the doomed boat captain, later played a sheriff in the 60s cult film Billy the Kid versus Dracula. The Vampire's Ghost, directed by Lesley Selander, was released on May 21, 1945. In the early 1970s, it played on the TV movie show Creature Features paired with House of Frankenstein. Another good blog review: http://houseinrlyeh.blogspot.com/2009/02/in-short-vampire-ghost-1945.html

Review: The Sinister Urge

2009-02-26T19:22:00.000-08:00

The Sinister Urge , 1960, 75 minutes, Headliner Productions; directed by Edward D. Wood, Jr., screenplay by Wood. Starring Kenne Duncan, Duke Moore, Jean Fontaine, Carl Anthony, Dino Fantini.

By Doug Gibson

The Sinister Urge is probably the least of Wood's mainstream films -- after he made it he started his slow slide into pornography -- but it's still a treat for cult movie fans, and Wood buffs who haven't seen it are in for a big treat. The plot concerns two hard-working detectives (Duncan and Moore) doing their best Gannon and Friday imitations. They're committed to smashing the smut picture racket, and in doing so viewers see several plump bathing beauties die at the hands of a teenage maniac (Fantini) who goes crazy when he sees an uncovered breast.

Many Wood regulars work in The Sinister Urge. Besides Duncan and Moore, there's Anthony, Harvey B. Dunne, John Carpenter, Conrad Brooks and Wood also has a cameo. Duncan's girlfriend at the time, a stripper named Betty Boatner, plays the murder victim in the opening scene. Fontaine, who acts as a sort of a Godmother of pornography, is hysterical. She spends half her time lolling around in bedtime garb, and carps hysterically in a cigarette-smoke-infested voice that s deeper than Clint Eastwood's.

The whole film cost slightly more than $20,000, and its tightness shows that Wood -- at least when sober -- was a director who could turn in a film on budget and in time. Due to the cheapness, most of the film seems to revolve within a single small set that takes turns being a police station, living room, and office. There are a few outdoor scenes, which due to the tiny budget appear amateurish. Scenes from Wood's never-finished film Hellborn were inserted into The Sinister Urge as part of a disjointed attempt to link the dangers of teenage violence into the plot of The Sinister Urge. It's fun to watch Wood and Brooks playing teens fighting each other in this sequence.

The Sinister Urge was considered an exploitation film in 1960 but it's very tame today. There are lots of chases but very little violence. It's worth a rental and can easily be purchased from several companies. There is also a MST3K version that's amusing.

Rudolph Grey's oral biography of Wood, Nightmare of Ecstasy, has a lot of info on The Sinister Urge, including Wood's shooting proposal -- which is very detailed -- that he gave to Headliner Productions head Roy Reid. A sequel was planned but never filmed. Much of the cast came from acting teacher Harry Keaton's class. Keaton had a small role in the film. He was Buster Keaton's brother. Duncan had a reputation as a heavy in the B-western films racket. Despie its low budget, The Sinister Urge is very competently directed. As mentioned, Wood shows he was capable of using discipline and following a budget. Star Fantini recalls seeing the film in New York City's 42nd Street area. Fontaine had a nightclub act, according to Grey's book on Wood.

Review: The Phantom Planet

2009-02-24T20:33:00.000-08:00

By Doug Gibson

The "Phantom Planet" is a 1961 low-budget space opera that is often mocked for its special effects and melodramatic plot. In fact, the 'bots on MST3K have spoofed it. Nevertheless, I find it a lot of fun. It is part of that endearing 1960s genre of low-budget space exploration films that are too ambitious for their plots. Films such as "Space Probe Taurus" and "The Wizard of Mars" come to mind.

"The Phantom Planet" takes place in 1986 and involves space ships out probing outer space for life. Some U.S. spaceships are disappearing so a new team is sent out. The two-man team is sucked toward a mysterious planet. One of the crew dies but Captain Frank Chapman (Dean Fredericks) survives. He lands on the planet Raydon, where everyone is 6 inches tall or so. He instantly become the same size,due to the weird atmosphere. Eventually Frank learns that Raydon is a planet trying to keep to itself and avoid conflict. One assumes there are a lot of people there but you never see more than a dozen or so Raydonians. There are a couple of beautiful sisters and Chapman is offered to choose one as a mate. I must add there is a sort of "Me Tarzan, You Jane" aspect to relations in this film that was common in these genre space operas.

Eventually, after a few personality conflicts Frank bands together with the Raydonians to fight the planet's enemies, the Solarites. A Solarite is a rather gross, tall chicken-type creature. The budget only allows for one (played by Richard Kiel of Eegah fame) and he proves easy to vanquish.

Frank falls in love with a beautiful Raydon girl (starlet Dolores Faith) and frets whether he should return to Earth. I'll spare future plot details to those who want to see this film. It's a fun time-waster. It slows a bit in the middle when Frank gets to Raydon and is out of the space craft, but the pace picks up at the end. All the genre fun is there: bizarre-looking space monsters, "popcorn-type" meteorites seen through a space capsule window, teeny tiny spaceship models moving clumsily through "space." It's corny but entertaining, what more can you ask of 90 minutes!

The film is easy to find. It is in black and white although I just saw a colorized version courtesy of Legend Films. It was directed by William Marshall, a 1940s "big band" star who became an actor. One of his wives was Ginger Rogers. Former silent film star Francis X. Bushman played the Raydon leader. Hugo Grimaldi, who later helmed the cultish "The Human Duplicators," was part of the production.

Review: Boom in the Moon

2009-02-21T18:20:00.000-08:00

By Doug Gibson

There's really no big reason to see Boom In the Moon ... unless you are a cult film fanatic. (And that's why we at Plan 9 Crunch are reviewing it) It's an obscure Buster Keaton feature from 1946, made in Mexico when Keaton was at the low point of his career (he later rebounded via TV and cameos in big-budget films). But in the mid-1940s, Buster Keaton was begging for work.

But, first some background: In the 1920s, Keaton was the king of cinema comedy. But he had a drinking problem that became more acute when talkies came and he signed a multi-picture deal to make comedies with Jimmy Durante. To put it charitably, Durante's manic, often-unfunny rantings grated on Keaton's physical, stone-face comedy. During the making of their last film, "What No Beer?" Keaton was so drunk he trashed his dressing room and disappeared from the set for several days. After the film wrapped, MGM canned Keaton.

After that, Keaton existed for almost 20 years in a sort of has-been netherworld. His chief income was making mostly second-rate comedy shorts for Educational Pictures and Columbia. Those efforts were overshadowed by The Three Stooges and Little Rascals shorts. He had not starred in a film for a long time when he accepted the lead role in Boom in the Moon, or as it was known in Mexico, The Modern Bluebird ("El Moderno Barba Azul)

It is a very low budget, often strange movie starring Keaton and a bunch of mediocre Mexican actors. Buster plays a sailor in a lifeboat who drifts for weeks. He doesn't know the World War 2 is over and thinks he is in Japan when he lands in Mexico. He is immediately arrested and accused of being a killer of young girls. He's paired with another clownish prisoner (Angel Garasa). The pair are offered the choice of flying to the moon in a very goofy professor's rocket instead of execution. After a bunch of clowning they accept. Somehow the professor's very pretty niece (Virginia Seret) is in the rocket when it blasts off.

After a few days the rocket lands. The trio thinks they are on the moon, but they are really just a few miles from where they took off. The two convicts are cleared ... No more synopsis in case some readers want to watch the film. (It's hard to find. The best bet is to check amazon and ebay for used copies)

The first half is a little better than the last half because Keaton has the opportunity to use a lot of physical comedy, including a funny bit in his cell. The last half unfortunately allows too many actors to babble, including one Mexican actor -- playing a silly psychiatrist -- who will cause viewers to grind their teeth in pain at his performance. The rocket is so low budget that it would not have qualified for a C-movies serial in the 1930s. Still, Keaton occasionally, with his physical deadpan humor, comes off well in a few scenes. Ironically, Garasa, as Keaton's sidekick, is as nasal and annoying as Durante was with Keaton 15 years earlier.

Keaton has very little dialogue, although the others prattle on too much. Boom in the Moon could have been a lot better if it had been shot silent, and relied on Keaton's emotion and physical comedy. But that likely occurred to nobody in 1946.

The film was released theatrically in Mexico and played only in Spanish for 37 years, including U.S. TV on Spanish-speaking stations. It was briefly released via VHS with English dubbing in 1983. The release wasn't very long and the film has become a little hard to find. I'm glad I watched it -- I have wanted to for at least a decade. It was good to see Keaton starring in any feature in 1946. Despite the poverty-row film, Keaton still retained flashes of the great talent in the The General and Steamboat Bill Jr., etc.

The Devil Bat -- A perfect 10 cult film!

2009-02-19T20:14:00.000-08:00

The Devil Bat

The Devil Bat, 1941, Producers Releasing Corporation, directed by Jean Yarbrough. Starring Bela Lugosi, Suzaane Kaaren, Dave O’Brien, Guy Usher, Hal Price. Sixty-nine minutes. Schlock-Meter Rating: 10 stars out of 10 stars. Note: Once sold on some video labels as Killer Bats.

By Doug Gibson

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Okay, I know that the plot of Devil Bat is silly. I know the budget is a $1.89. I know the special effects are ridiculous with rubber bats swooping down to victims’ necks. I’m aware that many critics, including John Stanley (whom I respect) consider Devil Bat an example of Lugosi’s slow side to oblivion, and Ed Wood movies. But Stanley is wrong, wrong, wrong!

Nevertheless, I love this film. It is a great cult movie because it has heart. Lugosi -- and the rest of the cast -- take their job seriously. They take a sow’s ear and turn it into a silk purse. The plot is as follows: A seemingly kindly scientist (Lugosi) has toiled his entire life for a perfume company. The scientist’s discoveries had made millions for the firm’s family, but he remains a salaried employee. For that he is bitter and angry, and has harvested killer bats that will attack the scent of a perfume. Of course, Lugosi gives the perfume to the rich family members, and murders occur. By the end, nosy reporters (including great 40s genre star Dave O'Brien, and cops uncover Lugosi’s crime and he is killed at the end. Of course, as was PRC’s and other minor 40s film companies’ wont, there is also a love story mixed in this thriller between O'Brien's reporter and starlet Suzanne Kaaren's heiress.

Bela Lugosi’s greatest talent was providing an excellent performance no matter the subject matter. His performance as a brooding scientist, bitter, angry, feeling underappreciated, is a masterpiece. There is a scene at the beginning of Devil Bat where the family members of the firm -- who really seem to love the scientist -- throw him an appreciation testimonial and provide him with a $25,000 gift. Lugosi’s scientist is all decorum in this scene, and it’s chilling when he’s alone and the mad, angry, bitter murderer is revealed. It’s an effective contrast, which I don’t think other 40 chiller stars George Zucco or John Carradine could have pulled off.

By all means, rent Devil Bat (I recommend you buy it) and lose yourself in a great actor making the most of a simple story. Lugosi on screen can hypnotize a viewer. One ignores the plot flaws and poor special effects and appreciates a master actor in a great performance.

Devil Bat is now available in a colorized version, and it's a lot of fun to watch. The public domain film can be seen for free on the Internet. I used the UEN Sci-Fi Friday version of the film, along with the educational podcast, in my beginning newswriting class in the University of Utah. It helped the students learn how to write a news feature story.

Star O'Brien was a low-budget western star for most of the 40s but also acted in 40s low-budget Lugosi thrillers, Bowery at Midnight and Spooks Run Wild, a farce with the Bowery Boys. Director Jean Yarbrough was a reliable low-budget film director, making the cult film The Brute Man with Rondo Hatton. He also directed the strange country music western film "Hillbillys in a Haunted House" with John Carradine, Lon Chaney Jr. and Basil Rathbone. Kaaren made about 40 mostly low-budget films between 1934 and 1942. She came out of retirement in 1982 for a role in the big-budget "The Cotton Club." Kaaren died in 2004 at age 92!

More on The Beast of Yucca Flats

2009-02-18T11:40:00.001-08:00

By Doug Gibson

When I first reviewed this film, I admit I trashed it. And it is a clunky, badly acted, ridiculously scripted ("FLAG ON THE MOON!") Z-grade flick. But you know what ... it's a cult film, and like my co-blogger Steve Stones says, "these ugly-puppy cult films start to look better after a while..."

My first review: http://p9crotd.blogspot.com/2008/06/review-beast-of-yucca-flats.html

Well, I guess I've seen Beast of Yucca Flats 10 times now, and the last time I watched it, a couple of weeks ago on UEN's Sci-Fi Friday, darn it, I have to admit I like this film. Who cannot love Tor Johnson lumbering through the California desert, even a Tor only a few years from death, weighing 400 pounds and sweating profusely.

The film involves Tor as a defecting Russian scientist, Dr. Joseph Javorsky, ready to meet with Cold War officials. (Some prints have a prologue of Tor killing a naked woman. It makes no sense and was probably inserted so the desperate producers could pitch the film to grindhouse theaters) As Tor arrives near "Yucca Flats" we see a scene with Ed Wood actor Conrad Brooks. (somehow I just bet Ed visited the shoot) Russian agents attack Tor and there's a lame shootout and car chase. Then an A bomb explodes, killing everyone but Tor, who is driven crazy.

The rest of the film involves Tor lumbering through the desert terrain killing a couple of people and chasing two boys who ditched their parents while fixing a flat. Two of the MOST INEPT highway patrolmen in film history try and catch Tor, but almost kill the boys' father instead, who is searching for them. Legend has it that the mom and boys are the wife and sons of director Coleman Francis, who narrates and has a cameo as a lazy filling station attendant. (Francis, by the way, has the distinction of having ALL of his films spoofed by MST3K)

I won't give the ending away. Beast of Yucca Flats was shot silent with very bad voice-over narration by Francis and recorded "dialogue" that is always spoken when you can't see the actors' faces. Director Francis actually tries to be arty sometimes. One scene in particular shows a worried mom through a car window from the opposite side. Fellini he isn't.

I guess I'm warming to this film because I have seen it so many times. I can laugh at it, spot Tor Johnson, Conrad Brooks and Coleman Francis and just enjoy the 55-minute film. As is the case with these films, the story behind the film is entertaining as well. The "publicity" for Beast of Yucca Flats was Ted Carcharas. He couldn't find any takers of the Tony Cardoza-produced film. So, the producers rented a theater in San Diego, Calif., and showed Beast of Yucca Flats themselves. Surprisingly, they attracted big crowds for a few days!

Eventually, Beast of Yucca Flats eventually was distributed as a "third feature" in drive-in theaters and all-night grindhouse theaters. The 1961 film was still being booked in theaters well into the 1970s. It's likely this deformed puppy of a cult film made a profit since its negative cost was only about $20,000. The film is in the public domain now as well as spoofed on MST3K. You can see both versions for free on the Internet, although you usually have to pay to find the version with nudity in the prologue. Some versions will snip the nudity and only show the incomprehensible murder in the prologue. Other versions completely omit the prologue.

Director Francis had a sad future after Beast of Yucca Flats. He virtually died a bum. Cult director Ray Dennis Steckler, who recently died, discovered Francis, an alcoholic, living on the streets in the late 1960s and gave him a part in his 1969 cult film noir flick, Body Fever. That's just the kind of nice guy Steckler was.

Review: Tales of Tomorrow: Frankenstein

2009-02-16T15:54:00.000-08:00

By Doug Gibson

The Frankenstein episode of early TV show Tales of Tomorrow is a historical curio. It's an example of TV in its infancy. There's nothing spectacular about the 1952 24-minute TV teleplay drama, filmed live. Its fortunate existence today is more teaching tool than art.

Lon Chaney Jr. plays the Monster. He's the only good thing about the plodding show. It has Ed Woodian bargain basement sets and props, as well as overtheatrical wooden acting by indistinguished TV actors of the time. The plot involves Dr. Victor Frankenstein (John Newland) living in a castle on the sea with his husband and wife servants and, for some reason, his young nephew (Michael Mann) is there. Also hanging around but not living in the castle is Mrs. Frankenstein (Mary Alice Moore) and her dad, who is also Dr. Frankenstein's mentor (Raymond Bramley).

Nothing much happens until Dr. Frankenstein unveils his monster (Chaney Jr.). He lumbers around the house, killing the maid and scaring the nephew and butler. This is all rather leaden sans much drama although Dr. Frankenstein offers quite a few long-winded laments. Eventually, the principals plot to do away with the Monster.

Chaney looks nothing like his 1942 performance as the Monster in The Ghost of Frankenstein, but he's an old horror hand and he knows how to roar and generally give a menacing performance.

Now, here's the most interesting part of this creaky curio of a TV show. Apparently, Chaney Jr., a severe alcoholic most of his life, was very intoxicated when the live shoot was being don. In fact, he was so intoxicated that he thought it was the dress rehearsal and refused to throw furniture to the floor. It is true that Chaney, in two scenes, gently places furniture back on the floor that is obviously meant to be tossed! You can also hear him mumble once "save it" as he places the furniture down. Otherwise, his role is mute with grunts.

As mentioned, an interesting curio, directed by TV director Don Medford. It is often in discount DVD packs, the kind sold via oldies.com or in dollar stores. It is free to watch on the Web or you can buy it on amazon.com also.

Here is a YouTube clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zt2Xz95DqjM

Horror fans will enjoy it, completists will want it. It's a chance to see Chaney Jr. in a TV setting. Despite his drinking, he stayed active in films until his death in the early 70s.

Voyage Into Space

2009-02-13T23:29:00.000-08:00

By Doug Gibson

Voyage Into Space is an absolutely bizarre 1970 or so Japanese monster-rama that involves a young boy, Johnny Sokko, having control over a crime-fighting, flying Giant Robot. Sokko and Giant Robot work for the Unicorns, a UN-type spy ring trying to save the world from the extraterrestrial evil, Guillotine, his various sidekicks, including "Spider" and Dr. Botanus. The "army" of Guillotine is "the Gargoyle Gang," a group of military types who resemble Nazis.

This is a weird movie but unbelievably entertaining for young kids and nostalgic adults who recall seeing it when they were young kids. I saw this film when I was 7, 8 or 9 and we used to talk about it on the playground in school. It stars no one you ever heard of, the special effects are pretty bad, the acting terrible, the dubbing weak, but it's strangely cool. There's a 1960s' counterculture aura to this film. Several of the baddies dress like they stepped out of a Roger Vadim film. Guillotine raises a whole host of monsters and some are pretty interesting. One is a giant plant; another is a giant eyeball (I kid you not).

But still, this film, released by American Independent Films to TV only, is woefully cheap. The battling monsters don't match up to the same size in close ups and far-away shots. In one scene, Johnny Sokko and a Unicorn agent wash up on the beach with their clothes fully dry and pressed and their hair neat. Johnny Sokko's dubbed voice sounds a little like Bea Arthur of The Golden Girls. The Giant Robot hero is very cool, though, and the film's theme song is catchy. My four year old son, who like his dad loves the film, hums the theme song daily.

Here's the big secret to Voyage Into Space. It's actually about four episodes, including the first and last, culled from a 30 or so-episode series from the late 60s called Johnny Sokko and His Flying Robot. That show also aired on TV, including on long-forgotten Channel 52 in Southern California when I was a kid. You can catch Johnny Sokko episodes today on http://www.hulu.com/ For more than a generation, you couldn't find Voyage Into Space on VHS or DVD. I spent decades wondering what had happened to my favorite Japanese color monster film. Finally, last year Sinister Cinema http://www.sinistercinema.com/ started selling the film. Since that occurred the floodgates have opened and Voyage Into Space, a public domain film, has many sellers.

It's a great film, particularly if you have a fondness for the Japanese monster genre, and your kids will love it.

Review: American Movie

2009-02-03T19:28:00.000-08:00

American Movie: The Making of Northwestern, color, 107 minutes, Northwest Films. Directed by Chris Smith. Starring Mark Borchadt, Mike Schank and Bill Borchadt. Rating: Nine stars out of 10.

American Movie: The Making of Northwestern is the most original slice of Americana captured on film since Michael Moore chronicled the corporate-caused decay of Flint, Mich. in Roger and Me more than a decade ago. Judged top documentary film at Sundance a few years ago, it’s the best of its genre since Waco: The Rules of Engagement managed to snag an Oscar nomination several years ago.
It’s the story of Mark Borchardt a wannabe film-maker, who redefines the word persistence. He lives in Wisconsin. Mark is, by most definitions, a loser. He failed to finish high school. He’s unmarried but has three children. He’s under-employed. He’s a border-line alcoholic. He owes several thousand dollars in child support and thousands more in other debts. He lives at home with his mom, sleeping on a thin mattress. His best friend is a dazed ex-stoner musician named Mike who’s addicted to scratch lottery. His family scorns his goals, suggesting that he’s fit at best to be a factory worker.
Mark has no prospects, but he has a goal. To be a feature film-maker. His almost-obsessive pursuit of that dream and his infectious optimism is captured by director Chris Smith. You want to see reality on film? Ignore the “Big Brother’ and “Survivor” garbage heaped onto television screens recently. American Movie is a primer on micro-budget film making and the fragile dreams of its creators.
Mark’s been making short films with his friends since he was a teen. Horror is his preferred genre. He counts The Texas Chainsaw Massacre as a major influence in his life. Mark wants to make a feature film called Northwestern. The first part of the film focuses on Mark and his team’s fruitless effort to get the production off the ground. Kitchen-table production meetings provide only pessimism and finally the project is shelved for lack of funds.
Not deterred, the rest of the film concerns Mark’s efforts to finish and release Coven, a 40-minute psychological horror drama that he started years earlier. Despite setback after setback, the film gets finished, thanks largely to Mark’s dying, lonely Uncle Bill, who lives in a trailer park and has $280,000 in the bank. The scenes between Mark and his curmudgeon uncle are touching. Mark exploits him to be sure, but he’s not fooling Bill, who knows Mark has pipe dreams but is nourished from the attention Mark pays to him.
There are priceless scenes in American Movie. They include a desperate Mark pleading with his mom to put on a costume and play an extra in Coven. “But I need to go shopping today,” she protests. There’s the 30-plus take scene of Uncle Bill delivering a few lines in Coven. Another is Mark’s glee at unexpectedly receiving a credit card offer in the mail. There’s Mark’s “office,” the front seat of his car parked at the airport. Another is the poverty-inspired panic which results in post production when a few seconds of film are discovered missing. Also, there’s a hilarious scene from the filming of Coven where several takes are required to smash a hard-headed actor’s skull through a kitchen cabinet.
A serious side to this film adds to its strength. Film-maker Smith provides viewers a peek in Mark’s personal life. It’s dysfunctional. While watching the Super Bowl with his family, a drunken Mark allows some of the bitterness he usually hides to come out in the surface. It’s tough to watch, but important as it rounds out his character and offers a peek into inner demons that have kept him from success.
Besides Uncle Bill, Mike Schank, Mark’s best friend, is an asset to American Movie. His blank stare, accompanied by monotone voice, might lead viewers to think he’s suffering from an acid flashback. However, Mike grows on you, and before the end of the film he’s shown to be a talented musician.
Despite no formal training, Mark is a talented self-taught film-maker, and you can’t help cheering for him once he finally finishes Coven and stands outside the theater, amidst a long line of people waiting to see his film. He may not have a home of his own, but he’s a director with a film under his belt, a colleague of Steven Spielburg. He has triumphed. Note: The DVD version of American Movie contains Mark’s film Coven. I have seen it and it's not too bad. Very low budget but with a cold, dark nihilism feel.

Doug Gibson

RIP: Ray Dennis Steckler

2009-01-28T11:20:00.000-08:00

Ray Dennis Steckler died on Jan. 7 at the age of 70 (almost 71). Active almost to the last, the famed cult film director had a few words to say in November at a tribute in Los Angeles to Academy Award-winning cinematographer Vilmos Zsigmond. Steckler gave him his start, as well as dozens of others. Steckler, like all true cultists, stayed obscure and more or less free of great wealth.
(The photo to the left is from his MySpace page)

I enjoyed reading his interviews and articles published in Cult Movies magazine. He was funny, humble and unique. I loved the quote, "What they have I don't need," in describing former associates now well off who were afraid to return his friendly phone calls.

Steckler also had a sense of humor when dealing with the mockers, including the MST3K crowd who wittily mocked "Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies." He took it in stride, likely just happy to see his best-known film on TV. (One thing I love about ISCWSLABMUZ is that much of it was filmed at the old Pike amusement park in my hometown, Long Beach, Calif.) Steckler was a serious craftsman, who late in life took many of his features and condensed them into hour B&W features. Those efforts, including his series of shorts, "The Lemon Grove Kids ..." underscored his love of the old, forgotten C-film genre. Steckler loved the Bowery Boys, the old PRC and Monogram films and particularly, the hour-long cowboy films of that genre.

I wish I had met the man. His interviews in 'zines and in Sinister Cinema DVD extras reveal a talented actor and filmmaker with the certain uniqueness that leaves a legitimate cult legacy. He was also cool. Who can forget the words in "Wild Guitar," from Steckler's "Cash Flagg" character "Steak": "This is Daisy, she's gonna teach you how to swing." You have to see and hear it to do it justice. Steckler was a trooper too. He directed that film as well, indulged his cinema love by using Bowery Boys-type characters and survived broken teeth when a punch from star Arch Hall Jr. was too realistic.

I'm glad that Steckler's films "Wild Guitar," Incredibly Strange Creatures..." and "Rat Pfink a Boo Boo" made it on Turner Classic Movies the last couple years of his life. He deserved the recognition. It's time to get more Steckler on TCM Underground. My vote would be for "Body Fever," Steckler's film-noir classic in which he and ex-wife Carolyn Brandt are perfect in their roles as private eye and jailbait thief. Other candidates include "The Thrill Killers," "Blood Shack" and "The Hollywood Strangler Meets the Skid Row Slasher." The Independent Film Channel could also benefit with some Steckler films on its roster.

So, RIP Ray Dennis Steckler, I hope you have had plenty of time to catch up with Liz Renay, Titus Moede, Forrest J. Ackerman, Coleman Francis, Arch Hall Sr., John Andrews and other cult icons long gone from Earth who once crossed your path.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Santa Claus Conquers the Martians

2009-01-24T20:31:00.000-08:00

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians" — This 1964 film was shot in an abandoned airport hangar in Long Island, N.Y., using many minor cast members from a NYC stage production of "Oliver Twist." It has a catchy theme song, "Hurray for Santy (sic) Claus," that you'll hum afterward. The plot involves Martians coming to earth, kidnapping Santa and whisking him away to cheer up the Martian kiddies. Two earth children are kidnapped along with Santa. Santa and the earth kids fight off a Martian baddie, prep a goofy Martian to become that planet's Santa, and launch off to earth in the spaceship. We never know if they made it home — perhaps the budget didn't allow that. The acting has to be seen to be believed, but the film has a goofy charm. It was a big hit on the now-gone "weekend matinee" circuit and played theaters for years. Pia Zadora, who was briefly a sexy starlet in the 1980s, plays one of the Martian children. John Call, as Santa, does a mean "ho, ho, ho." Film was also spoofed by MST3K.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Santa and the Three Bears

2009-01-19T11:13:00.000-08:00

"Santa and the Three Bears" — If you lived in Southern California long ago, this 1970 blend of live action and cartoon was a Thanksgiving afternoon staple on KTLA Channel 5. The animation is mediocre, but the story has a simple charm. A forest ranger teaches two excitable bear cubs about Christmas while their grouchy mother bear wants them to hibernate for the winter. The ranger agrees to play Santa for the cubs on Christmas Eve, but a storm keeps "Santa" away ... or does it? The best part of the film is the live-action beginning and ending, where the ranger sits by the Christmas tree with his grandaughter, a sleepy cat and many toys. The ranger is voiced and played by Hal Smith, best known as Otis the town drunk on "The Andy Griffith Show." Grumpy Mama Bear was voiced by Jean Vander Pyl (Wilma on "The Flintstones"). The uncredited director is Barry Mahon, who made soft-core sex films in the 1960s with such titles as "Nudes Inc." and "The Sex Killer."
-- Doug Gibson

Review: Planet of the Vampires

2009-01-14T15:18:00.000-08:00

This is a very interesting, effective 1965 early Mario Bava film. It involves astronauts entering a seemingly deserted world and slowly being picked apart one by one by desperate aliens seeking new life forms.
Unlike many genre directors who thrive on gloomy, forbidding black and white images, Bava manages to convey fear and horror through the use of vivid, almost garish color. That is notable in his horror anthology Black Sabbath. In Planet of the Vampires, the color, particularly red, along with the claustrophobic atmosphere of the spaceship and even the colorful planet, add to the tension and terror the crew feels as they are picked off one by one.
The only major American star in the 86-minute film is the late character actor Barry Sullivan as the space crew captain. Brazilian Norma Bengall also stars. The rest are capable European actors. The story is similar in narrative and design to the later horror classic Alien. Believe it or not, there are also similarities to the recent Stephenie Meyer book "The Host." Bava's "vampires" are not necessarily evil; they are desperate creatures trying their best to stave off extinction. They'll do anything to achieve their goals.
Planet of the Vampires is a must-have film for Bava fans and 1960s "space opera" fans. There's a "twist ending," but alert viewers will see it coming.

-- Doug Gibson

Review of Santa Claus

2009-01-13T20:06:00.000-08:00

"Santa Claus" — Don't confuse this 1959 Mexican film with Dudley Moore's "Santa Claus: The Movie" or Tim Allen's "The Santa Clause" films. This import is weird and a little creepy, but it sticks with you. Old Kris Kringle is a sort of recluse who talks to himself and lives in a castle in outer space. He has no elves. His helpers are children from around the world who can't sing very well, though they belt out a lot of songs. Santa's reindeer are, I think, plastic and he uses a key to start them. Santa also works out on an exercise belt to slim down for the chimneys. For some reason Santa hangs out with Merlin the Magician. Enter "Pitch," a devil. His goal is to stop Santa from delivering presents. Pitch is a wimpy fellow in red tights and wears what looks like a short middy skirt. Santa and Merlin foil Pitch's nefarious plans. The film also focuses on two children, a poor girl and a rich, neglected boy, who resist Pitch's temptations. There are magic flowers and even special drinks. Santa glides safely to a chimney using a parasol. If this film sounds to readers like the after-effects of taking two Percocet, you got the gist of it.

-- Doug Gibson

Sequels to Pride and Prejudice

2009-01-07T14:25:00.000-08:00

To some readers, the classics, or just a good novel, are made to have a Part Two. Unfortunately, few authors feel the same, and many a great novel ends in suspense. For six decades, Margaret Mitchell fans waited to find out if Scarlett O’Hara ever won back Rhett Butler. The soft-spoken Mitchell, when asked that question, always replied, “I don’t know.”

Eventually, the long-dead Mitchell’s estate, eager to make a big pile of cash quickly, commissioned romance novelist Alexandra Ripley to write a sequel. The result was Scarlett, a long, semi-bloated, often lackluster, sometimes entertaining continuation that resulted in Rhett and Scarlett hooking up for good in Ireland. It wasn’t a bad novel, but the characters, so well defined by Mitchell in Gone With the Wind, seemed like caricatures. It was as if readers were at a community playhouse watching semi-talented locals reciting lines. The film version of Scarlett was worse, but that’s another essay...

Wanna know a secret? When it comes to the classics, Scarlett ranks as one of the greatest sequels not crafted by the original author. For decades, fans of the writing greats have succumbed to the temptation to continue a tale best laid to rest. I admit it’s an alluring thought. I’d love to know if 1984's Inner Party was ever overthrown, or if Doremus Jessup, the hero of It Can’t Happen Here, ever managed to help restore America to democracy. Or did Clinton-like preacher Elmer Gantry ever face a scandal that ruined him?

Jane Austen whets the appetite for a sequel. Her main novels, Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility, Mansfield Park, Emma and Northanger Abbey are masterpieces of characterization and parody. Although she’s never lagged in interest, Austen has experienced a surge in popularity the past decade. Most of her books have been made into films recently and Jane Austen clubs dot the world. Any day, crowds of Austen fans will file in to the local library and eagerly take in a lecture. A sample topic might be the “difference between attachment and connection in Austen’s England, and how that relates to Sense and Sensibility....” Austen died relatively young, and never attempted a sequel.

With the current Jane-mania, however, comes a new round of unauthorized sequels cluttering up space in bookstores and public libraries. Some authors are adoring fans, clumsily trying to pay homage to their favorite authors. A few are professional romance novelists looking to cash in on Austen to make a quick buck. Others, more atrociously, are post-modernists trying to attach Austen’s settings and characters to politically correct ideals.

A casual perusal of amazon.com listed more than a dozen Jane Austen sequels:

- The Bar Sinister: Pride and Prejudice Continued

- Letters From Pemberley: The First Year: A Continuation of Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice

- Presumption: An Entertainment: A Sequel to Pride and Prejudice

- Consequence: Or Whatever Became of Charlotte Lucas

- The Ladies: A Shining Constellation of Wit and Beauty

- An Unequal Marriage, Or Pride and Prejudice Twenty Years Later

- Desire and Duty: A Sequel to Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice

- Lady Catherine’s Necklace

- Pemberley or Pride and Prejudice Continued

- The Diary of Henry Fitzwilliam Darcy

- Pride and Promiscuity: The Lost Sex Scenes of Jane Austen

- Virtue and Vanity

- Old Friends and New Fancies: An Imaginary Sequel to the Novels of Jane Austen

No doubt there are more. The first sequels to Pride and Prejudice were published in the 19th century.

Eager to find out what others believed were the fates of the Bennets, Darcys, Collinses, Bingleys, De Bourghs and other Pride and Prejudice characters, your reviewer managed this past summer to slog through four of these unauthorized Pride and Prejudice sequels. They were Presumption, Desire and Duty, Lady Catherine’s Necklace and Pemberley.

The best of the lot was Presumption, by Julia Barrett. It’s very mediocre, but at least Barrett understands what the others apparently don’t: Jane Austen was poking fun at sentimental novels of her era. Her novels were parodies, as is Presumption. The title tells you that it’s all for fun. Presumption focuses, as most of the sequels do – on the love life of Mr. Darcy’s younger sister Georgiana. She’s tempted at first by a dashing officer, but eventually finds love with an architect. They quarrel for a while before falling in love. The parallel to Darcy and Elizabeth is a safe, and obvious, creative tool by Barrett. The weakest part of the novel is Elizabeth’s constant fear that she will never gain approval of Darcy’s elder friends and relations. To highlight this threat, a ridiculous subplot involves Elizabeth’s Aunt Phillips being accused of theft, which threatens her reputation by association.

However, Presumption is a gem compared to Desire and Duty, written by the husband/wife team of Ted and Marilyn Bader. The Baders are devoted fans of Austen, and the authors try desperately to follow Austen’s style but it is a crude effort. The plot plays like an older version of Sweet Valley High in pre-Victorian London. Once again Georgiana is the focus, but she spends most of the novel unmarried, eventually fluttering around the possibly haunted Darcy estate learning of her dead mother. The lack of focus on a much-needed key plot element makes Desire and Duty frequently dull for long spots.

The Baders are nothing if not persistent, however. They’ve recently had the chutzpah to publish Virtue and Vanity, a sequel to a sequel.

Nevertheless, Desire and Duty is a better novel than Lady Catherine’s Necklace, a boring sequel composed largely of characters from Pride and Prejudice that no one cared about. Forget about the major characters. They at best have cameos. The plot involves Anne De Bourgh and her search to learn more about her deceased father. I could tell you more, but you’d stop reading this essay. One major gaffe by author Joan Aiken is having Anne be too young. She’s maybe 17, but she was earlier considered marriage material a few years earlier for Mr. Darcy in Pride and Prejudice. Another presumption is Aiken having Colonel Fitzwilliam, a thoroughly decent man in P&P, turn out to be a cad. That’s an insult to Austen’s memory.

As bad as Lady Catherine’s Necklace is, it’s still better than Pemberley, the worst of the P&P sequels reviewed. This book is so terrible, I’m surprised Jane Austen didn’t rise from her grave and strangle author Emma Tennant over her word processor. The plot runs like a bad season of Ryan’s Hope. Elizabeth loses all her will and is a silly ninny who takes to her bed during a crisis. Georgiana loses her loyalty to Elizabeth and joins Caroline Bingley in teasing her. Writing gaffes include Jane Bennet with one child and already pregnant with another. Worse, Lydia has four children. This is all supposed to have occurred around a year after all three were married, an impossibility.

Pemberley achieves camp, however, when Mrs. Bennet discusses feminine hygiene at the Darcy dinner table. Readers will finally throw the book up in the air (or in the fireplace) when it’s revealed that Jane’s hubby Mr. Bingley had an affair with a French woman prior to his marriage.

Pemberley is an example of post-modern ninny authors trying to sexualize Jane Austen’s works. To do this they attempt to show the characters as sexual beings. But that’s contrary to a message that Austen revealed in P&P despite the comedic elements: Virtue, morality, fidelity, love and honesty are rewarded. Sexual permissiveness, as in the case of Lydia and Wickham, hamper the reputation of both. It is the positive examples of Jane and Elizabeth that lead to success for the Bennet family.

I’m through with wanna-be sequels. The best solution for creating a sequel to Pride and Prejudice, or any beloved novel, is for the reader’s imagination to carry the plot. It’s a method that allows total editorial freedom, and a chance to correct bad plot turns without revealing your weaknesses to the rest of the world.

Book review: Papa Married a Mormon

2008-12-30T21:05:00.000-08:00

Few people really understand the fear felt by Mormons in the genesis of the faith's flight to Utah to avoid what members perceived as severe persecution in Missouri and Illinois. In the latter half of the 19th century non-Mormons, or "gentiles" were regarded as intruders in "Zion" bent on either crushing the saints or forcibly removing them from their third homeland. In The Kingdom or Nothing, Samuel Taylor's biography of Mormon prophet John Taylor, when settlers heard rumors of a planned U.S. military "invasion" upon the Utah territory, church settlers abandoned the new Salt Lake City and trudged south to Provo, leaving instructions to a few left behind to burn everything if the soldiers assumed command of the city.

These sentiments are nearly gone, although stronger a generation ago, when Utahn John D. Fitzgerald wrote the popular novel Papa Married a Mormon.

Times have changed, and Papa Married a Mormon has been adapted to the stage many times in Utah. The novel, first published in 1955 by Prentice Hall, is easy to find at used bookstores. Two sequels followed: Mama's Boarding House, and Uncle Will and the Fitzgerald Curse.

Set in the 1880s and 90s in the fictional southern Utah towns of Adenville and Silverlode, the most unique aspect of Fitzgerald's novel is that a significant portion of it is true, albeit with a healthy dose of journalistic license, no doubt. Fitzgerald is writing about his family: His Uncle Will, who leaves Pennsylvania in disgrace to seek a life as a gambler/gunslinger; His father Tom, Sr., who obeys a deathbed wish to find Will and tracks him down, finding him a rich saloon and gambling hall owner in Silverlode, a mining town close to the Mormon settlement of Adenville, which is headed by the towns's bishop, Ephraim Aden.

Once reconciled with Will, Tom takes over the Silverlode newspaper, and gains the trust of Adenville Mormons whose subscriptions, printing and advertising provide him a means of support. All this is threatened when he meets and falls instantly in love with Tena Neilsen, the 17-year-old daughter of Mormon emigrants from Europe. After a struggle with Tena and her family, Tom wins her heart, marries her in Denver and eventually the pair return to southern Utah with Tom (and Tena) considerably less popular among the saints than they had been previously.

While the novel's chapters feature diverse tales (there's whole chapters devoted to saloon rowdies, kids's pranks, family genealogy, gun fights, and dog fights) in essence the rest of Fitzgerald's novel deals with the growth of Tom and Tena's s multi-religious family in Adenville and their slow but eventual acceptance by the Mormon majority. This subject provides the most powerful writing in the novel, as Fitzgerald portrays the suffering his mother feels, outwardly as a rejected saint, and inwardly as her Mormon conscience tears at her act of rebellion in marrying a gentile.

"Papa knew that Momma's life was very lonely. The Latter-day Saints politely ignored her because she was an apostate. They would not let her trade in Adenville; even the farmers refused to sell her eggs and vegetables. ... Two weeks before the baby was born, Papa went through a night of torture. Mama had barely spoken to him all evening. About midnight he awoke and heard Mama crying ... He put his arm around her ... Momma threw him off, 'Don't touch me,' she cried piteously."

When Tom insists that Tena explain her behavior, she admits that she doesn't feel married to him, since Mormons are married for time and all eternity. Tom goes to Bishop Aden and asks to be baptized a Mormon. The Bishop refuses to baptize Tom to placate his wife, but marries the pair outside a temple for time and all eternity. Although this would be frowned on today, it was not unusual in 18th century Utah to conduct "time and all eternity" marriages from outside a temple or endowment house. But it was certainly unusual if the groom was a Catholic.

Papa Married a Mormon is a fun read for anyone, but also a Utah history lesson. Fitzgerald writes each chapter like a separate story, so readers can jump in anywhere. One weakness is a tendency for the author to be a bit flowery in his prose, so at times romance almost becomes farce. Also, although Fitzgerald's heart is in the right place, he exhibits a condescending attitude toward Native Americans, a vice likely widespread in 1950s literature. One more thing: The novel comes with pictures of all the family members Fitzgerald writes about. It's fun to put a face to Tom, Tena and the Fitzgerald gang.

A postscript: I did some research and discovered that the Fitzgerald lived in Price, Utah, not Southern Utah. "Papa" did marry a Mormon, but he was a local financial professional, not a journalist, and also was an elected official. Author John D. Fitzgerald lived a fascinating life, with many unique jobs. He merits a biography.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Strangler of the Swamp

2008-12-23T20:36:00.000-08:00

This is a fabulous film, perhaps Producer Releasing Corporations best, along with Bluebeard, although I have a soft spot for The Devil Bat. The 1946 film is lean, just under and hour, directed by Frank Wisbar. It's based on a French film. The atmosphere is incredible. The swamp is other-wordly, and the rural Americans seem toexist in another time and world. Charles Middleton, the gaunt, frightening Strangler, was the Emporer Ming in the old Flash Gordon serials. Rosemary LaPlanche, former Miss America, has a purity an innocence that connects to the vengeful Strangler. A young, later to be famous as a director/writer Blake Edwards, is good as LaPlanche's love interest. Rural locals in the film are well cast as well. (LaPlanche later starred in PRC's weird "sequel" to "The Devil Bat," "Devil Bat's Daughter.

Here is a small capsule review I wrote for "Strangler of the Swamp" as part of a column for The Standard-Examiner and later Plan 9 Crunch's main blog:

"Strangler of the Swamp" — Made in 1948, this atmospheric thriller involves a man, hanged for a murder he didn't commit, who returns as a ghost and assumes the role of ferryman at the swamp. Instead of ferrying passengers, he strangles locals in revenge. Finally, a young woman (Rosemary LaPlanche) prepares to offer herself as a sacrifice to get the ghost to leave. The strangler (Charles Middleton) was "Emperor Ming" in the old "Flash Gordon" serials.

As mentioned, a great 40s C genre film, better than most A productions of that time. Don't miss it!

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The Wizard of Mars

2008-12-16T19:30:00.000-08:00

I really love this 1963 David Hewitt ultra-low budget space opera. I'll say right off that one of the aliens in this film is the same "Space Monster" from the Leonard Katzman schlock-fare also called Space Probe Taurus.

Ripped off from L. Frank Baum's famous tale, The Wizard of Oz, here is the Wikipedia description of 85-minute, color "The Wizard of Mars":

The title character is portrayed by John Carradine, who gives a lengthy monologue as a projection near the end of the film. The film centers on four astronauts--Steve (Roger Gentry), "Doc" (Vic McGee), Charlie (Jerry Rannow), and of course, Dorothy (Eve Bernhardt), shown aboard ship wearing Silver Shoes--who dream they are struck by a storm and encounter the Horrors of the Red Planet (one of the film's video retitlings), and eventually follow a "Golden Road" to the Ancient City where they encounter the title character, who is the collective consciousness of all Martians.

It's that crazy. The characters are wonderful stock space opera fare: The older mentor astronaut. The sexy woman astronaut who eventually gets the hots for the stud, leader astronaut. And, of course, there's the wisecracking astronaut. There is Hewitt's signature of touch of foamy, wavy fire waves that he has used in other films. I particularly like a strange creature -- guided by offscreen hands -- that menace the astronauts while they row in a Martian canal. The creature looks like a low-rent Tingler!

The space fare is low budget and I love the asteroid showers! This is a fun film. I first became aware of it while watching Something Weird OnDemand trailers. I found it on an old VHS that was titled Horrors of the Red Planet and said Lon Chaney Jr. was in it? WRONG. I later learned that Wizard of Mars was shopped as "Alien Massacre" along with Hewitt's schlocky "Gallery of Horrors," which features Chaney Jr. Such is the life of low-budget sci-fi being peddled in the early days of VHS and even Beta!

It became almost an obsession to find this film with its original title, and Plan 9 Crunch finally did, and old 80s VHS release had it. Carradine s wonderfully bizarre spouting nonsensical dialogue as "The Wizard." Of course it's all a dream. That really doesn't make sense, but again, the film really doesn't make sense. I loved it. Watch it as a double-feature with "Space Monster" or Hewitt's better "Journey to the Center of Time." You won't be disappointed.

-- Doug Gibson

Remembering FJA

2008-12-14T21:18:00.000-08:00

Forrest J. Ackerman died on Dec. 4 at the old age of 92, but FJA, like Dracula, Frankenstein, The Wolf Man, or Sci-Fi, the genre name he coined, will never really die. For 80 years, FJA Ackerman exemplified the horror and sci-fi genre.

The man was a part of every cycle in cult films. What more can you say about a man, who as a teen, actually went into a theater and saw Lon Chaney in the long-lost film "London After Midnight. Always a collector, FJA once had the original sound discs to James Whale's Frankenstein ... until Ed Wood chrony John Andrews allegedly stole them! FJA owned Bela Lugosi's scrapbook, until Edwards allegedly swiped that. (Despite his perfidy, John Edwards will always be loved for his priceless anecdotes about Ed Wood).

Speaking of Wood, FJA remained a friend even after the Plan 9 director had descended into porn. FJA was a friend to everyone in the genre. His "Ackermansion" was the source of many events. He put out the best genre magazine in the 50s and 60s, and late in his life offered some great "Spaceman" editions on the flip side of the late, great Cult Movies mag.

I'm looking through FJA's filmography. He was in almost 50 films, from The Howling, to Dracula v. Frankenstein to Amazon Women of the Moon, the 76 King Kong, Return of the Living Dead 2, Kentucky Fried Movie, Queen of Blood and to The Vampire Hunters Club. What a thrill it was to watch David Hewitt's low-budget space opera The Wizard of Mars and see FJA as "technical adviser!" You bet FJA was a techical adviser -- when it came to these films, he was the best.

Rest in Peace, FJA, those of us who love to be scared are forever in your debt!

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Black Dragons

2008-12-09T20:54:00.000-08:00

Black Dragons is probably Bela Lugosi's oddest C-movie cheapie, and let's face it, the competition is fierce. But, oh, how I love these old '40s gems. It's a Monogram film, made under its Banner Productions. I'm sure it played in LA and NYC street theaters and smaller cities and towns, perhaps paired with an East Side Kids flick?

But I digress: Black Dragons, 1942, directed by William Nigh, runs 64 B&W minutes and stars Lugosi as Dr. Melcher and Monsieur Colomb. He's a sinister guy who pops up just as a bunch of American industrialists are getting mysteriouslybumped off. There is also pretty Joan Barclay as the niece of a Dr. Saunders, who is all mixed up in whatever is going on. It's also fun to see future Lone Ranger Clayton Moore as an FBI agent.

Now, we have mysterious deaths, we have Lugosi. It's all set to be a horror, right ... ahem, no. This is 1942, the U.S. is at war with the Axis, and Monogram head honcho Sam Katzman saw money to be made by creating a combination thriller/WW2 propaganda anti-Japanese film. So that's what Black Dragons is, and it makes the film an interesting historical curio piece.

You see, these U.S. industrialists are Japanese spies, created through plastic surgery to look like the American industrialists. Lugosi was the Nazi-like surgeon who did all this in Japan ... and then was doublecrossed and thrown in prison. Somehow -- the film sort of glosses over this -- Lugosi escaped Japan and headed to the U.S. to get his revenge on the spies.

As I mentioned, I love these time-capsule films. Monogram was famous for its bizarre intricate plots that its ultra-low budgets just could never keep up with. They dissolve into fun nonsensical action. Lugosi is Lugosi in this film. He's wonderful, whether he's coyly flirting with starlet Barclay or cleverly and calmly dispatching his victims. And there's also that wonderful, ubiquitous menacing, Monogram music.

The boom of video and DVD plus public domain has made Black Dragons easy to find. It's often in the $1 DVD bin at Wal-Mart or in the 20- to 50-set public domain offerings. Those with broadband Internet can watch it free on the Net. Buy it and enjoy an hour's diversion into a different filmmaking existence.

-- Doug Gibson

Book review: The Road to Los Angeles

2008-12-04T11:34:00.000-08:00

The Road to Los Angeles, by John Fante, Black Sparrow Press, 164 pages, 1985. Originally written in the 1930s.

John Fante's first novel, The Road to Los Angeles, sat in the trunk for more than 50 years, finally to be published after his death. It's a brilliant, manic, energetic, wild at times almost incoherent novel of a pretentious well-read 18 year old, Arturo Bandini, trying to sow his oats in Depression-era Southern California. If Holden Caulfield had been on drugs, he might have resembled Arturo Bandini.

The subject matter might have scared away 1930s publishers. Arturo, is to put it mildly, quite eccentric. He masturbates to photos of women who he develops fantasy relationships with, then executes them by tearing the pages apart. He scorns religion, mercilessly teasing his devout mother and sister. He's a thief, a vandal, and he delights in killing crabs and other small critters. He has a vivid imagination, and manages to write a novel in a week. He also has ups and downs, and frequently maims himself and thinks of suicide.

What keeps The Road to Los Angeles at a fast pace is the vivid imagination of the author Fante. At times the novel seems written in a stream of consciousness, so quickly do ideas, mad, cruel or otherwise, flow from the mind of the character Bandini. One of the high points of the novel is Fante's description of fish canneries, where Bandini works. They are putrid, choking, grotesque factories where employees are paid 25 cents an hour and rewarded with a smell that no bath can wash away.

Fante's spare, fast-paced prose, with short sentences, was an inspiration for Charles Bukowski, who regarded Fante as his idol. Fante eventually gravitated to Hollywood and wrote mostly screenplays. One Full of Life, was also made into a movie. However, hard living and untreated diabetes left him lame and blind. He was living in obscurity in the mid 1970s when Bukowski sought out his idol, and eventually stirred re-interest in Fante's work.

-- Doug Gibson

Book review: Death of a Transvestite

2008-12-01T23:02:00.000-08:00

Death of a Transvestite, by Ed Wood Jr., 172 pages, Four Walls Eight Windows Press, 1999. Originally published by Pad Library in 1967 under the title Let Me Die in Drag.

Besides making some of the most ridiculous ... and unique films ever produced, the infamous Ed Wood produced a lot of writing. He may have written more than 100 novels, and perhaps 1000 short stories. Friends recall that the prolific Wood could wake up, sit down in front of a typewriter and finish an entire screenplay by the evening. Wood's second career writing novels and stories, however, took off in tandem with his alcoholism. He wrote exploitation novels for the cheap paperback market, receiving only a few hundred dollars a book and no royalties. Many of his books have pseudonyms, and by the end of his life, he was writing mainly pornography.

In Nightmare of Ecstasy, Rudolph Gray's excellent oral biography of Wood, the author points to Killer in Drag and Death of a Transvestite as Wood's strongest literary efforts. He's probably right. Death of a Transvestite, a sequel to Killer in Drag, was written before Wood had more or less entirely gravitated to porno. It's a sleazy but entertaining tale of Glenn, a hit man for the Mafia who is also a transvestite, albeit a heterosexual one. The story begins with Glenn in prison, facing execution, relating the story of his life to the warden. In return, the warden will allow Glenn to be executed in drag.

It's actually better than it sounds. Wood was too lazy a researcher to produce a great book, but he captures the underbelly of the characters and settings. Cliches, sleazy prose, sex scenes, violent deaths and hyperbole abound in Death of a Transvestite, but the novel has heart. You root for Glenn. Try to imagine Elmore Leonard producing a first draft of a novel written in a couple of days without spell checks and, presto, you have Death of a Transvestite.

Most of Wood's books are out of print of course, and they command a very high price (in the hundreds of dollars) when an original can be found. However, Four Walls Eight Windows Press, a publisher with offices in New York and London, has reintroduced a few of Wood's novels. (Some were introduced in England in the late 80s) Death of a Transvestite and Killer in Drag can be found at most bookstores, and another Wood re-release, an earlier previously unpublished novel called Hollywood Rat Race, can be purchased via Amazon.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter

2008-11-19T17:57:00.000-08:00

Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter, 1966, Embassy Pictures, 88 minutes, color. Directed by William Beaudine. Starring John Lupton as Jesse James, Narda Onyx as Dr. Maria Frankenstein, Estelita as Juanita Lopez, Cal Bolder as Hank Tracy/Igor, and Jim Davis as Marshall MacPhee. Rating: Three and one-half stars out of 10.

In the mid-60s Embassy Pictures produced an odd duo: Billy the Kid versus Dracula and Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter. THEY WERE NOT COMEDIES, for which we should be thankful for, since they are much funnier as straight western/horror melodramas. Billy the Kid (also reviewed on this site) is a little better, primarily because John Carradine overacts in a campy manner as the vampire. I doubt that these films played beyond the Saturday matinee level, if at all. Any web surfers know?

Except for the many chuckles at the horrendous dialogue and ultra-cheap special effects, Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter is a pretty wretched film. The plot? Dr. Maria Frankenstein and her cowed brother Rudolph are hiding out in the Wild West trying to resurrect the dead without success. They are, however, scaring the entire countryside, which seems to consist of only an aging Mexican diva named Juanita (Estelita) and her stereotypical parents. Soon arrives James (Lupton) and his big sidekick Hank Tracy (Bolder), whose been wounded. They're on the run, and Maria agrees to help Hank, but she plans on using him as a guinea pig for an artificial brain. Maria at first tries to seduce Jesse, but he rebuffs her so she tries to have him killed. After Hank becomes the monster, she changes his name to Igor, and has him kill her brother. Somewhere in this mess Jesse and Juanita fall in love and Maria is foiled in her plans.

If this film was black and white and had more unique dialogue, you'd swear it was an Ed Wood film. The laboratory in the film rivals that which was used in Bride of the Monster for bargain basement props. The acting is horrendous. The dialogue is all cliches, conveyed with eye-rolling melodrama. However, the one bright spot is Onyx as Dr. Maria Frankenstein. She plays her role with a kind of mad gleefulness. Her expressions, particularly her eyes, are those of a full-fledged loonie. She was born for this role. Bolder as Jesse's sidekick Hank turned Igor is portrayed as am imbecile, although it's debatable as to whether that was the script's intention or the result of Mr. Bolder's acting skills.

This film if seen, is best viewed as a midnight offering at a party. It will provide some laughs. Some trivia: Estelita died of influenza soon after the film was completed. Lupton, who played Jesse James was a veteran character actor who played mainly TV roles. He was on several Gomer Pyle USMC episodes playing various officers.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: House of Dracula

2008-11-16T14:25:00.001-08:00

House of Dracula, 1945, Black & White, Universal, 67 minutes. Directed by Erle C. Kenton. Starring Onslow Stevens as Dr. Edelman, John Carradine as Count Dracula (aka Baron Latos), Lon Chaney Jr. as Lawrence Talbot, Glenn Strange as the Frankenstein monster, and Skelton Knaggs as Steinmuhl. Schlock-meter rating: Seven stars out of 10.

House of Dracula is a guilty pleasure. Filmed just as WW 2 was ending, it and its companion piece, House of Frankenstein, signaled the permanent slide of Universal horror films as second-billed B movies. The sets are cheaper, plot explanations are often ignored, and the direction is quick and economical. Still, these films are a lot of fun and boast much higher production values than their competitors of the time from Monogram and PRC.

The plot is quite bizarre. Both Dracula (Carradine) and Talbot the Wolfman pop up at an eerie castle run by the famous doctor Dr. Edelman (Stevens), who seems to exist there only with his deformed nurse and beautiful daughter. Nearby is a village full of stock rural Europeans that Universal always seemed to provide as a backdrop to these films. Anyway, both Dracula and the Wolfman seek cures via a combination of psychiatry and medicine, a theme that was explored in Dracula's Daughter. Edelman seems rather unperturbed by all this, and goes about helping the two. However, Dracula can't keep his lips off the doctor's beautiful daughter's neck, and Talbot the Wolfman somehow escapes from his self-imposed prison while a wolf and discovers the Frankenstein Monster hiding in a cave. Edelman manages to kill Dracula, but not before the Count contaminates Edelman's blood with his own. Much to the doctor's horror, he transforms often into a dreadful creature, unable to control a desire to kill, and another to bring back the Frankenstein Monster to life.

Viewers, just sit back and relax. Let this goofy but fun plot unfold and enjoy a handful of Universal monsters fight it out on the screen. Carradine is better than expected. He plays his role in a subtle manner, which is smart because he lacks Lugosi's passion. Chaney is a contrast of self pity and ferocity, depending on whether the moon is full. Strange has little to do as the Frankenstein Monster but wave his arms wildly. Stevens' transformation to madman is chilling at times. He casually has his faithful nurse murdered. Veteran creepy character actor Skelton Knaggs adds atmosphere as a villager who whips up the town against the doctor. All in all, House of Dracula is worth a midnight rental.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Sammy and Rosie Get Laid

2008-11-13T07:05:00.000-08:00

Sammy and Rosie Get Laid, 1988, British, Miramax, 98 minutes, color. Directed by Stephen Frears. Screenplay by Hanif Kureishi. Cast includes Shashi Kapoor as Rafi Rahman, Frances Barber as Rosie Hobbs, Claire Bloom as Alice, Ayub Khan-Din as Sammy, Roland Gift as Danny/Victoria, Wendy Gazelle as Anna, Meera Syal as Anna, Suzette Llewelly as Vivia, Badi Uzzaman as Cabbie/The Ghost. Rating: Eight stars out of 10.

Sammy and Rosie Get Laid is a film that defines the end of a generation. It's the mid-1980s and the sexual and political revolutions of the 1960s still flourish, but definitely as a counter-culture. The ideas, as Rosie puts it, of "Freedom plus commitment" is being rejected by a British society that has embraced Margaret Thatcher and the ideals of strict conservative morality and capitalism. Still, in a pocket of color within London, Sammy, an immigrant accountant and his wife Rosie, a social worker, thrive. They are in love and have lovers. Sammy is currently having an affair with Wendy, an American artist with Ws tattoed on both buttocks. As Anna explains, everytime she bends over it spells WOW. Rosie will soon bed an attractive black squatter called Victoria (played by Fine Young Cannibals singer Gift) by those who like him. Sammy and Rosie like their life. They spend weekends at plays, essays, classes, and walking through their city, London. As they exclaim, they are Londoners, not Brits. An eclectic crowd surrounds them of gays, homeless, artists, council (public housing) dwellers, squatters, immigrant shopkeepers, scared, vicious police, and riots. However, life is changing. Sammy and Rosie's part of London is beginning to percolate as racial tensions and injustice bubble to the surface. The police kill a black woman who thought her home was being invaded. Before the film is over, the neighborhood will at times begin to resemble 1980s Beirut.

Critic Roger Ebert describes Sammy and Rosie as a film about London, and writes that those who love London will appreciate director Frears and screenwriter Kureishi's efforts to bring London to its multi-cultural life. Many different scenes of London are displayed: Sammy's office, an artist's studio, a wealthy woman's home, Sammy and Rosie's apartment, a council flat, a squatter's settlement, London parks, the airport, a riot in the streets, and a lot more. Kureishi's films have brought many Asian actors to mainstream audiences, and in Sammy and Rosie, the famous Indian actor Shashi Kapoor stars as Sammy's father Rafi, a former high political figure in his native country (It is never made clear what the country is) who has a reputation as a torturer and murderer of thousands. Rafi returns to England to see his son and visit an English woman, Alice -- played by Claire Bloom -- whom he loved and abandoned 30 years ago. Rafi also confides to Sammy that he is on the run from potential assassins, and that he wants to give his fortune to Sammy.

Rafi is suffering though. He continues to see a ghost of a man with one eye and a bandage over his head, who first appears as his cabby at the airport. This ghost will eventually lead Rafi to a terrifying experience. Rafi also finds the sexual lifestyle of Sammy and Rosie disturbing, but remains tolerant to a degree. However, his hopes to live a peaceful life with his son and daughter-in-law are threatened when details of his past as a torturer are slowly revealed. Rosie cannot accept it, and her lesbian friends are ready to kill Rafi. He also receives a deserved comeuppance from spurned lover Alice, who at times resembles a modern-day Miss Havershim.

Rafi's visit eventually brings Sammy and Rosie to a realization that perhaps they aren't as open minded as they thought. The tragedy of his time with them brings a disagreement --- Sammy can't abandon his dad, and Rosie can't forgive and forget what he's done. Eventually, his presence leads to a break-up. Sammy and Rosie Get Laid is a witty, at times touching film with an honest ending that portrays racism and oppression without blinders. There's no happy ending because it doesn't exist yet.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Barfly

2008-11-11T06:56:00.000-08:00

Barfly, 1987, Color, 100 minutes, Cannon. Directed by Barbet Schroeder. Screenplay by Charles Bukowski. Starring Mickey Rourke as Henry Chinaski, Faye Dunaway as Wanda Wilcox, Alice Krige as Tully Sorenson, Jack Nance as Detective, and Frank Stallone as Eddie. Bukowski appears as an extra in a bar scene. Rating: Seven and one-half stars out of 10.

Perhaps almost as interesting as the film Barfly is the story of how it was OKd as a film project. Director Barbet Schroeder, who had spent years trying to Charles Bukowski's semi-autobiographical script made into a film, barged into the head of Cannon's film division and threatened to cut off his finger with a chainsaw if the film was not financed. The suits backtracked, and Barfly was made into a pretty decent film, bolstered by very strong performances from stars Rourke and Dunaway.

As mentioned, Barfly was written by the late Bukowski, a prolific writer who abused his body terribly with bravado but produced great novels, short stories and poems, that chronicled the life of the poor and drunken. Los Angeles was the setting for most of his work. Most of Bukowski's work was autobiographical, and he frequently used the name Henry Chinaski. In Barfly, drunken, acclaimed writer Chinaski meets an older, once pretty woman named Wanda Wilcox, played by Dunaway. Wilcox is based on the great love of Bukowski's life, Jane Cooney Baker, who died of drink in 1961. Dunaway captures Bukowski's seediness so well that the author later claimed he was never that scruffy. Rourke later commented ironically that it was probably tough for the screenwriter to see himself as he really was. Dunaway may have been too attractive to play Chinaski's aging faithless, alcoholic lover, but despite's Bukowski's dislike for her performance, she captures the part perfectly. She's a mixture of anger, passion, bitterness, love, defeat, vulnerability and violence. The scene where she beats up a rich young admirer/lover of Chinaski (Krige) while Rourke smiles with whimsy is a highlight of the film. Stallone as a bullying bartender who fights Chinaski is above average. Real barflies from downtown Los Angeles were used as extras to add flavor to Barfly.

The film did mixed business in the U.S., but was a big hit in Europe, where Bukowski is arguably more famous. He later wrote a very funny novel, Hollywood, based on the making on the film. Bukowski's other novels include Post Office (his best), Factotum (a homage to Down and Out in Paris and London), Women, Ham on Rye and Pulp. He was a prolific poet, so much that his publisher, Black Sparrow Press, continued to publish new work years after his death in 1994.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The Haunted Palace

2008-11-06T21:09:00.000-08:00

The Haunted Palace, 1963, 85 minutes, American International, directed by Roger Corman. Starring Vincent Price as Charles Dexter Ward/Joseph Curwen, Debra Paget as Ana Ward, Frank Maxwell as Ian/Dr. Willett, Lon Chaney Jr. as Simon Orne, Leo Gordon as Edgar Weeden/Ezra Weeden and Cathie Merchant as Hester Tillinghast. Schlock-Meter rating: 7 stars out of 10.

This is a better-than-average Vincent Price AIP 1960s offering. It offers chills, atmosphere and good direction from movie legend Corman. The story concerns a mild mannered man (Price), who moves to the mysterious town of Arkham with his wife (Paget) to inhabit a creepy castle, or palace. The townspeople, a forbidding, brooding, suspicious group except for one doctor (Maxwell), react in panic after they discover Price's character (Charles Dexter Ward) resembles an evil ancestor (Joseph Curwen) who was executed by Arkham residents long ago.

It isn't long before Price begins to take on the personality of his evil ancestor, much to the terror of his lovely wife, whom he begins to treat very roughly. With some assistance, the now evil Price (possessed by Curwen) spends much of the film extracting revenge from the descendents of the townspeople who killed him, and trying to resurrect to life a long-dead love (Merchent).
The film boasts a lot of atmosphere. Including aging horror great Lon Chaney Jr. was a casting coup for Corman. As an evil henchman of Price, he doesn't have much to do, but he lends a spooky credibility to the film just with his presence.

The title The Haunted Palace is from Edgar Allen Poe, but there's no resemblance to the story. Indeed the plot is from an H.P. Lovecraft short novel, The Strange Case of Charles Dexter Ward, but even then, the story only touches briefly on Lovecraft's plot. As is often with a Lovecraft tale, the sinister town of Arkham is the setting. Fans of Price will really enjoy this film. He's at his best. Others will find it an excellent sample of AIP's 60s horror offerings.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The Black Scorpion

2008-11-03T22:25:00.000-08:00

The Black Scorpion, 1957, 88 minutes, AMEX Productions, B&W. Directed by Edward Ludwig. Starring Richard Denning as Hank Scott, Mara Corday as Teresa Alverez, Carlos Rivas as Artur Ramos, Mario Navarro as Juanito and Carlos Muzquiz as Dr. Velazco. Schlock-Meter rating: 5 and 1/2 stars out of 10.

This tale of giant scorpions is a mostly dull programmer that is enhanced a bit by superior stop-motion special effects of giant scorpions attacking humans, animals, cars, trains and each other. Despite the better-than average fx for this low budget, the film is marred by repeated close-up viewings of a giant black scorpions' face. It's a sort of silly looking, staid puppet-like image that drools, and will draw a few chuckles.

Here's the plot: Mexico is suffering a spate of earthquakes and volcanic eruptions. This unleashes a whole group of giant black scorpions from the bowels of the earth that crawl out at night and ravage the countryside. A pair of geologists (Scott and Rivas) help the police and scientists try to find the creatures' weak spots. The climatic battle takes place in a huge soccer stadium in Mexico City.

The acting is pretty blah, and the plot recycled fatigue. We have a dull love tale between Scott and Corday, an annoying stereotypical, nosy boy (Navarro) who you wish a spider would kill, and some unfunny, tasteless jokes. But scenes of the scorpions attacking a train, fighting each other in a volcano's cave, and one terrorizing Mexico City are fun to watch. According to a writer at the Internet Movie Data Base, the fxs were prepared by Willis O'Brien, the creator of the stop-motion effects for King Kong.

The Black Scorpion has much better fx than Earth Versus the Spider, another '50s cult film, but it's uninspired story and dull stretches rate it lower as a cult film than than the gleefully inept Spider. Worth renting only for the effects, and keep the fast-forward on your remote handy.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The Mad Monster

2008-10-30T07:33:00.000-07:00

The Mad Monster, 77 minutes, Producers Releasing Corporation, B&W. Directed by Sam Newfield. Starring George Zucco as Dr. Lorenzo Cameron, Johnny Downs as Tom Gregory, Anne Nagel as Lenora Cameron, Glenn Strange as Petro/the monster, and Sarah Padden as the grandmother. Schlock-meter rating: Five stars out of 10.

The first time I watched this vintage PRC cheapie, I gave it a couple of stars and compared it to later dogs like Beast of Yucca Flats and The Creeping Terror. However, during my second viewing I warmed a little to the film. It is, as one reviewer has said, so bad it fascinates. I agree. The plot: Mad scientist Lorenzo Cameron (Zucco), rebuffed by his peers, injects wolf blood into a simpleminded handyman (Strange) turning him into a well-dressed dog/wolf man. Ostensibly, the crazy doc plans to create warriors to defeat the Nazis and other enemies with his injections, but he eventually uses the monster to kill his enemies. The plot, which is recycled pulp, includes a backwoods country swamp setting, a beautiful daughter, her reporter boyfriend, and the cops.

The bottom of the barrel budget hampers Mad Monster, but there are scenes of high camp that are bizarre: The opening sequence involves the mad Zucco injecting Petro in the laboratory with blood from a snarling creature in a cage. During the scene, the doctor hallucinates a debate with his scientist colleagues (who appear as misty personages). I guess low-budget director Newfield was trying to show Zucco is mad, but it seems like he's on an LSD trip. Also, some filter is used to make the country swamp seem dank and foggy, but it just looks like the air is filled with cheesecloth.

The film lags often and should have been trimmed to an hour. There are several scenes where actors, who have nothing to do, sit and wait for the camera to stop rolling. Despite the budget and bad script, Zucco, a veteran of low-grade horrors, does a capable job. PRC starlet Nagel is pretty, and has a voice that is a dead ringer for Judy Garland. Unfortunately her reporter/boyfriend Gregory has a squeaky voice. Strange, who later would play the Frankenstein monster in a few films, is terrible. As the dim-witted Petro, he's a fourth-rate imitation of Lon Chaney Jr's Lenny in Of Mice and Men. In fact, he seems to have a far better personality as the monster. In a small role, Padden is creepy as a cackling backwoods grandma. The film ends, as was often the style 60 years ago, with the young lovers embracing in front of a burning house. It's worth a rental if you like C and B movies from the 30s and 40s.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman

2008-10-28T06:37:00.000-07:00

Frankenstein Meets The Wolfman, 1943, Universal, directed by Roy William Neill, starring Bela Lugosi, Lon Chaney Jr., Patric Knowles, Ilona Massey, Maria Ouspenskaya, Lionel Atwill, Dwight Frye. Schlock-Meter rating: 8 stars out of 10.

Frankensten Meets the Wolfman is a fun movie that classic horror film lovers will enjoy. It's not quite at the level of the 1930s Frankenstein tales, and it's a little short -- or perhaps it just ends too abruptly for this reviewer. Nevertheless, it has three stars of the genre (Lugosi, Chaney Jr., Frye), a gorgeous female lead (Massey) and the reliably sinister Atwill and Ouspenskaya.

The plot involves the wolfman (Chaney Jr.) desperately trying to find a way to die so he can stop killing when the moon turns full. He's on the run, with gypsy Ouspensakaya helping him, when he encounters Dr. Frankenstein's granddaughter (Massey). From her he seeks the secret to ending an immortal life. Eventually, they stumble upon the frozen Frankenstein monster (Lugosi)within a decaying castle. A doctor who wants to take the cursed Chaney Jr. back to an asylum falls under the Frankenstein obsession and revives the monster to full strength. The full moon rise, and, you guessed it: We have a climatic monster battle royale.

The film is hampered by Lugosi's weak performance as the Frankenstein monster. He shambles around in a pathetic manner with his arms akimbo, looking every bit the 60 years of age he was during filming. In fairness, however, the original script called for Lugosi to be blind and included a speaking role for him. That was scrapped by Universal, and as a result Lugosi looks a little silly to unaware audiences. Still, he portrays very little menace as the monster, even despite the sabatoge by Universal.

Chaney Jr., as the cursed Larry Talbot, is very good. The first half of the film, as he makes his way to the Frankenstein castle, is very chilling and atmospheric. Knowles as the obsessed doctor fails to inspire, but the attractive Massey adds to the film. Old horror hands Atwill, Frye and Ouspenskaya add atmosphere. As mentioned, the final fight scene between Lugosi and Chaney Jr. is too brief, but it's good while it lasts. It's a pity both needed stunt men to finish the scene.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The original Dracula

2008-10-24T18:57:00.000-07:00

Dracula, 1931, 75 minutes, Universal, black and white. Directed by Tod Browning. Starring Bela Lugosi as Count Dracula, Helen Chandler as Mina Seward, Dwight Frye as Renfield, David Manners as Jonathan Harker and Edward Van Sloan as Dr. Van Helsing. Schlock-Meter rating: 9 and 1/2 stars out of 10.

As a film, Dracula too often appears like a stage play. Most of the actors aren't particularly strong, and the climax of the film (Dracula's death) foolishly takes place off screen. Nevertheless, thanks to Bela Lugosi -- and to a lesser extent Dwight Frye -- the film remains a classic, a true cult film that brings viewers back for repeat visits to Transylvania, foggy London and Carfax Abbey, the lair of the Count. The plot: Dracula prepares for a move to London. He drives Renfield (a Londoner in Transylvania to help him move), mad, and then arrives in London. He soon ingratiates himself with the Seward family, and lusts for the blood of two ladies. He is foiled when a family friend (Van Sloan) suspects he is a vampire, and pretty Mina Seward (Chandler) is saved when Dracula is destroyed.

Lugosi's performance is magnificent. He is truly the Count, with his urbane charm, his sly humor (I never drink ... wine.), his greedy eyes sighting blood, his melodramatic answers to questions, and his artful fencing with vampire hunter Van Helsing. However, few critics capture another personality of Lugosi's Dracula: His desire to die. In a poignant scene at an opera, Dracula expounds in melodramatic fashion the peace of death. One realizes in that scene the Count wants to die, that he's as much a prisoner of fate as his victims. He simply lacks the will power to end his long existence.

Frye's Renfield is marvelous. He succeeds in convincing viewers that the secret of the Count -- discovered first hand -- is so horrible that it would drive anyone insane. His mad chuckles when discovered on a deserted ship are chilling. Frye also conveys terror and adoration when pleading with Dracula late in the film. Manners and Chandler are barely adequate as two lovers threatened by Lugosi's Dracula, but Van Sloan is pretty strong as Van Helsing. He manages a sense of humor despite the seriousness of his task, and reminds me of Donald Pleasance's slightly crazy psychiatrist who pursued monster Michael Meyers in Halloween.

Lugosi's eyes, used to seduce victims, are hypnotic. He knew this character -- he'd played Dracula on Broadway. Director Browning conveys atmosphere early in the film with scenes of a coach in the wilds of Transylvania and a ship tossed at sea. Unfortunately, the last two-thirds of the film is often too static and talky. But every scene with Lugosi is a pleasure, and he turns an ordinary film into a classic of the genre.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Dracula (Spanish version)

2008-10-23T18:49:00.000-07:00

Dracula (Spanish-language version), 1931, 104 minutes, Universal, black and white. In Spanish with subtitles. Directed by George Medford and Enrique Tovar Avalos. Starring Carlos Villarias as Conde Dracula, Lupita Tovar as Eva Seward, Pablo Alvarez Rubio as Renfield, Barry Norton as Juan Harker, Carmen Guerrero as Lucia, Jose Soriano Vioscia as Dr. Seward and Eduardo Arozamena as Professor Van Helsing. Schlock-Meter rating: 8 and 1/2 stars out of 10.

Universal's Spanish-language version of Bram Stoker's tale was shot at the same time the Bela Lugosi classic was filmed. The same sets, props and backdrops were utilized. As the story goes, the Spanish-language version was shot late at night, after other Dracula director Tod Browning's cast and crew shot during the day. This version was out of circulation in the United States for decades before being rediscovered. The film is wonderful, and only the talent of Bela Lugosi prevents it from rating as high as the "conventional" Dracula. In fact, in many ways, this longer, more gothic, version is an improvement on director Browning's too often stagey version.

The Spanish-version Dracula is a very sensual movie. However, unlike Lugosi -- who is the sexual creature in Browning's film -- it's the women in the Spanish-language Dracula who radiate sexuality. Unlike the buttoned-up, Victorian-like Helen Chandler's Mina Seward in Browning's version, Lupita Tovar's Eva Seward (the same character) is a sexual creature whose erotic awakening is brought on by Conde Dracula (Villarias). She's shy and virginal at first, but, late in the film, in a low-cut nightgown which shows a surprising amount of cleavage for a 1931 film, she rises from her bed under Dracula's spell, eager to meet the night. Carmen Guerrero, as Dracula victim Lucia, is also sexier than her counterpart in Browning's version.

Also, the Spanish-speaking version of Dracula is much longer than Browning's version. Sometimes this hurts -- occasionally the film will lag as scenes go on to long -- but mostly it's an improvement. Characters like the mad Renfield, Eva Seward and Professor Van Helsing are more developed, and viewers will care more about their fate. Also, there are wonderfully spooky scenes that are missing in Browning's version. They include: Dracula walking through a spider's web without disturbing it; Renfield's horror at watching Dracula commanding a door to open; the terror of sailors battling a storm who see Dracula on their ship; shots of rats and bugs as Dracula's had reaches out of his coffin; and Renfield repeatedly assuring Dracula that no one knows of his trip to his castle in Transylvania. There is a wonderful scene -- not in the Browning film -- where Renfield, politely relating the history of his life to Van Helsing, calmly stops to catch a fly. Also, Renfield's death at the hands of Dracula is captured in a more brutal shot than in Browning's film. Finally, Tovar's Eva Seward is much more aware of her fate and the possessive spell Dracula has over her. In a memorable scene, she begs Professor Van Helsing to kill her after Dracula is finished with her.

The weakest link is Barry Norton's Juan Harker. He's as mediocre as David Manners in the Lugosi film. Villarias as Conde Dracula does a good job, but he pales in comparison to Lugosi. But in fairness, who can compete with Lugosi? Lugosi is sinister and charming. Villarias is forbidding and creepy. Also, Villarias will occasionally mug too much for the camera, a problem that Renfield's Rubio (who also does a good job overall) has as well. Rubio's madness is a bit more forced that Dwight Frye's Renfield. Instead of Frye's calculating, horror-filled mad chuckles, Rubio periodically breaks into hysterical screaming, which is annoying. Arozamena's Van Helsing is good, but also fails to rise to the level of Edward Van Sloan's Van Helsing in the Browning film. His delivery is a little too forced, and his character lacks the subtle wit that Van Helsing utilized while verbally sparring with Dracula. Vioscia is adequate as Dr. Seward.

However, if you're a Dracula fan, you'll love this film. It's a must for any cult film collector and today can be easily found (Amazon sells it online). As mentioned, the story is richer (viewers of this film now know what Browning cut from his Dracula) and Villarias, while no Lugosi, is still better than 90 percent of the rest of the Draculas of filmdom. Also, the "I never drink ..... wine" line is as great in Spanish as it is in English. Co-director Medford was a veteran of many silent films.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The Mummy's Ghost

2008-10-21T19:09:00.000-07:00

The Mummy's Ghost, 1944, Universal, 61 minutes, B&W. Directed by Reginald Le Borg. Starring Lon Chaney Jr. as Kharis, John Carradine as Yousef Bey, Ramsay Ames as Amina Mansori, Robert Lowery as Tom Hervey, Frank Reicher as Prof. Matthew Norman, Barton MacLane as Inspector Walgreen, and George Zucco as Andoheb, High Priest of Arkan. Schlock-Meter rating: Eight stars out of 10.

The Mummy's Ghost is pulp horror at its finest. I confess to loving this lean, mean never-a-wasted-minute B programmer from Universal. There's no excess fat to trim from this film. It's like watching a good comic strip -- every scene is key to the horror tale. The film never takes itself too seriously, but at the same time does not descend to camp level. It's a damn good hour's entertainment. Film students who want to see how a good B film could provide fun to 1940s movie-goers should make The Mummy's Ghost required viewing. It would have been great to view this in a theater with say, House of Frankenstein.

Here's the plot: Egyptian cult disciple Carradine is commanded by a high priest (Zucco, in a wonderful small part)to revive mummy Kharis and find the long lost princess Ananka, Kharis' love who was taken from his tomb. This leads them to a small university community (Mapleton) where a professor of Egyptology revives Kharis with boiled leaves of tanna. The professor is murdered for his troubles, and soon Kharis and Carradine narrow their search to a pretty coed (Ames) with Egyptian blood, who it is suspected, is the reincarnated Ananka. Her boyfriend (Hervey) tries to protect her from both the mummy Kharis and suspicious townfolk who suspect she's part of the latest round of mummy murders. The ending is dark, which is surprising for a horror film of that era, but still very effective.

The Mummy's Ghost is one of a several-part Universal 1940s offering that featured the mummy Kharis and his search for revenge and his lost love. Ghost was the second-to-last of the series. Chaney was Kharis in all but the first film, The Mummy's Hand (in which Tom Tyler was an effective Kharis). Surprisingly, Chaney is the weakest link in this otherwise tight, effective thriller. He shambles around awkwardly and inspires few shivers. Carradine and especially Zucco are very good as cult disciples. All in all, a great little film and definitely worth owning as an example of entertaining by-the-numbers B-movie filmmaking.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Cat People (1942)

2008-10-16T20:41:00.000-07:00

Cat People, 1942, 73 minutes, B/W, RKO Radio Pictures, Directed by Jacques Tourneur, produced by Val Lewton, Starring Simone Simon as Irena Dubrovna, Kent Smith as Oliver Reed, Tom Conway as Dr. Louis Judd and Jane Randolph as Alice Moore. Schlock-Meter rating: 8 and 1/2 stars out of 10.

Val Lewton's Cat People is a horror film that only works if a viewer uses his or her imagination. Those who are too lazy to think while watching a film will go away unimpressed with Cat People. Others, who use their intellect, will be pleased. The scare scenes are deliberately underplayed, and mood, tension and film noir is used to create a creepy sensation of dread and terror in this tale of a young beauty who turns deadly beast when her passion, or anger, is aroused.

Here's the plot: A bachelor architect named Oliver (Smith) becomes infatuated with a shy Serbian-born beauty named Irena (Simon). They first meet at a zoo, where she's sketching a panther. They fall in love and are married. There's just one hitch. His young bride refuses to make love with him, or even kiss him. Also, animals seems to hate her. At first, Oliver bears this with the patience of a saint. However, the lack of intimacy leads him to a romance with Alice (Randolph) a co-worker and longtime friend. In an effort to help Irena overcome her fear of intimacy, a semi-creepy psychiatrist (Conway) is hired to help treat her.

Simon as Irena is a talented actress who manages to convey helplessness with her fate with a sinister malice when aroused by anger. In what is definitely the most chilling scene, Irena -- angry at seeing Alice and Oliver together, follows Alice to an indoor pool. In the dark natatorium, Alice hears the growls of a panther. She dives into the pool, and eventually shrieks in terror as snarls and ripping sounds are heard. When others come to help and the lights are turned on, there is only the petite Irena, with a look of satisfied menace on her face. Also, when the psychiatrist Dr. Judd tries to seduce Irena, it leads to fatal results.

Cat People is not a perfect film. The extramarital romance between Oliver and Alice seems rushed and forced. If these two have worked together for years, why didn't the sparks fly earlier? Also, Oliver doesn't seem to try very hard to enjoy conjugal pleasures with his pretty bride, despite her protests. Not enough background is provided to Irena's previous life in a Serbian village which supposedly led to her present state of woman/animal.

Still, this is a must see for cult film fans. It's strength is what it leaves to the imagination, rather than what it provides on the screen. It's far superior to a 1980s re-make-in-name-only that bathed viewers in sex and gore. A sequel, Curse of the Cat People, was released in 1948.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Son of Dracula

2008-10-14T20:33:00.000-07:00

Son of Dracula, 1943, Universal, B/W, 80 minutes. Directed by Robert Siodmark. Starring Lon Chaney Jr., Louise Albritton, Robert Paige, Evelyn Ankers, Frank Craven. Schlock-Meter rating: 8 stars out of 10.

Son of Dracula is an enjoyable old-time horror flick with a suitably creepy if miscast Lon Chaney Jr. as Count Alucard (spell it backwards) visiting the American South in hopes of forming an unholy alliance with Kay, a woman (Albritton) obsessed with the occult. There are some above-average special effects. The Count is finally foiled by his confederate (Albritton) as she helps her confused one-time fiance Frank (Paige) destroy the Count's daytime resting spot, thereby destroying him. However, at the end, Frank -- unable to bear what Kay has become ot share her wish to be "undead" -- burns her in her coffin. Several stock characters (family doctor, visiting Hungarian professor, old Hungarian gypsy woman, dopey sheriff) also match wits with the Count.

As mentioned, this film is a winner and worthy of a rental. It's fast-paced, has a unique plot and always keeps the viewer's interest. But here are some quibbles. First, Chaney is a weak Count. He provides no charm of sinister finesse like a Lugosi, for instance. Instead, he comes across as an intimidating brute. In fairness to Chaney, however, the script is very unkind to his character.

This is the first Dracula who fails to hold control over the woman he has added to the ranks of the undead. In fact Albritton's character is the bigger villain in the film. She uses Count Alucard to gain immortality, marries him and then plots quickly to kill him and replace his space in the coffin with Paige. I often wondered why Bela Lugosi was passed up for this role. After seeing Count Alucard's role, I'm not surprised. Lugosi can play many roles, but a cuckolded Count is not one of them. Seriously, Lugosi's star had already faded a lot at Universal and he was lucky to get the Frankenstein role that same year in Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman.

Although the film seems like an A production for its time, you can also see the beginnings of the Universal monsters' slide into B moviedom in Son of Dracula. There are characters (a judge) and Kay's sister Claire (Ankers) who are introduced and then remain undeveloped and fade away. There are stock black servants which are dated and racist today. Also, although it seems there is a town somewhere in the set, it never seems to be seen.

On the plus side, Paige is very good as the bewildered fiance and Albritton makes a charming villianess. It's a great Universal early horror and well worth 80 minutes of any cult movie fan's time.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The Corpse Vanishes

2008-10-09T21:15:00.000-07:00

The Corpse Vanishes, 64 minutes, Monogram, 1942, B&W. Directed by Wallace Fox, Starring Bela Lugosi as Dr. Lorenz, Luana Walters as Patricia Hunter, Tristam Coffin as Dr. Foster, Elizabeth Russell as Countess Lorenz, Minerva Urecal as Fagah, Angelo Rossitto as Toby and Kenneth Harian as Keenan. Schlock-meter rating: Seven and one-half stars out of 10.

I love this film, while recognizing that the production values are virtually nil and the script leaves 1,000 plot holes and makes all the heroes seem like ninnies for not solving the crime early in the film. I have a soft heart for Bela Lugosi cheapie productions in the 1940s and this Monogram C movie is a hoot. The plot is sufficiently bizarre: Brides are dropping dead at the altar and their corpses are later whisked away before the real morticians alive. The only clue is that flowers are delivered to the victims minutes before they die. Neither the press or the police have a clue (although you'd think they could at least prevent the stealing of the corpse!) The public is up in arms, although there are still many weddings.

Enter nosy cub reporter Patricia Hunter (Walters). Prodded by her sexist editor, she tracks the flowers to the mysterious Dr. Lorenz (Lugosi) who resides with his crazy wife (Russell, in a wild performance) haggish sister, and her two sons, one a midget and the other a large simpleton. It turns out (of course) that Lorenz is the mad scientist, causing a death-like state to the wannabe brides, taking them to his laboratory (dig the fake brick walls!), withdrawing youth serum from the young ladies, and injecting it into his elderly wife to keep her youthful. (Another wonderful plot hole never explained is why Lorenz' wife is roughly 30 years older than him!). Hunter, aided by a lovesick doctor (Coffin), eventually foils Lorenz' evil plot, and of course, the pair are married (safely) at the end. The print I viewed did not reveal the fate of the sleeping brides --- perhaps Monogram lacked the budget to add a final scene?

The Corpse Vanishes is full of atmosphere. Lugosi, Urecal, Rossitto (who plays the midget) were all veterans of 1940s cheapies. Lugosi gives his usual great performance, and is aided by Russell, who acts truly crazy as his aged wife. Urecal provides a creepy atmosphere as well. This film is definitely worth a rental, and for those who are interested in Hollywood's history of B and C films, is worth a purchase.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Glen Or Glenda

2008-10-07T06:55:00.000-07:00

1952, 67 minutes, B&W, Screen Classics Productions. Directed by Edward D. Wood Jr.. Starring Bela Lugosi, Daniel Davis (Ed Wood), Lyle Talbot, Dolores Fuller, Timothy Farrell, Tommy Haines, Charles Crofts, Conrad Brooks, Captain DeZita. Schlock-Meter rating: 9 stars out of 10.

I first saw Glen Or Glenda? when a copy of the video arrived as part of the press kit for the mid-90s film "Ed Wood." The copy was murky, very dark and difficult to understand. It also ended abruptly without any final credits. As a result, I wasn't too impressed. However, I learned later there were better versions available with more of the film so I invested $10 and purchased Rhino Home Video's print. I saw a much different film that is a must for Ed Wood fans and an excellent addition to any cult movie library.

Like any other Ed Wood film, it's a ridiculous story, incomprehensible at times and very poorly acted. However, like any Ed Wood film, it is unique and the actors surprisingly inspired. The plot: A transvestite commits suicide while in drag. A cop talks with a psychiatrist, who tells the cop that society must seek to understand transvestites and those who seek to change their sex. The psychiatrist tells the cop two stories: One is of a secret tranvestite (Davis/Wood) who wants desperately to wear his fiance's (Fuller) angora sweater. The other tale recounted is of a WW 2 war hero (Haines) who wants a sex change operation. All of this is sort of overseen by a spirit (Lugosi) who sits in a chair covered with fishing net and ominously spouts nonsense like "snips and tails and puppy dog tails," "pull the string," and "the story must be told."

The acting is just awful. Wood's girlfriend Fuller doesn't rise to the level of an eighth grader playing Juliet. The scene of her expressing her mental torment when Wood asks to wear her sweater is pure camp. Throughout the film the uninhibited Wood strolls through Hollywood dressed in drag looking in store windows. The dialogue is atrocious: "Give this man satin undies ... and he can be a credit to his community and his government." Like many micro-budget productions, much of the film utilizes voice-over narration.

Still, it's a great cult fim and merits its nine stars on the schlock-meter. Wood's creative chaos is in full force and it makes for deliriously entertaining scenes. Stock footage just swirls throughout this fun film. There are shots of buffalo stampedes, steel mills pushing out hot metal, military battles, kids playing ball and more. Wood's frenetic energy keeps the pace fast. Indeed, the only time the film slows down is a few moments of cheescake semi-bondage scenes of women in underwear (not directed by Wood) that producer George Weiss added for the "raincoat" crowd.
Cult movie fans will love the montage scenes where Glen dreams of telling his fiance of his secret. He's attacked by all his friends including the devil, delightfully performed by DeZita.

Glen or Glenda? as silly as it is, was actually a fairly courageous topic for Wood to tackle in 1952. It's pomposity and lack-of-tact direction made it a cult film rather quickly. Indeed, it was haunting midnight movie houses in New York by the 1970s.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Dracula's Daughter

2008-10-02T08:10:00.000-07:00

Dracula's Daughter, 1936, Black and White, Universal, 71 minutes. Directed by Lambert Hillyer. Starring Gloria Holden as Countess Marya Zaleska, Otto Kruger as Dr. Jeffrey Garth, Marguerite Churchill as Janet Blake, Edward Van Sloan as Professor Van Helsing, Gilbert Emery as Sir Basil Humphrey and Irving Pichel as Sandor. Schlock-meter rating: Nine stars out of 10.

Dracula's Daughter was not a box office success when released in 1936. It seems that a lady villain who sucked blood failed to grasp audiences. That was the 1930s' loss. Dracula's Daughter is a magnificent sequel. It can even be argued that it is superior to the original Dracula. Gloria Holden, as the doomed daughter of the Count, radiates feral sensuality. She bemoans her fate, yet eagery succumbs to its temptations. Her mannerisms, her facial gestures, all her personality are filled with the needy arrogance of a vampire. Still, like her father, she longs to be free of the undead curse. Holden's countess is a lonely woman. Her eyes do a wonderful job of expressing that lust for companionship.

Here's the plot: Dracula's death has been discovered. Van Helsing is under suspicion by London's finest. Countess Zaleska (Holden) arrives to take the Count's remains, claiming to be his daughter. With her is a creepy servant named Sandor (Pichel). Zaleska rejoices, believing that Dracula's death has freed her from vampirism. She is wrong, of course, and continues to seek blood from the living. In one scene, she bleeds a young prostitute named Lili. Many critics claim there's strong overtones of lesbianism in that scene. While the scene is slightly erotic, I doubt that was in the minds of the filmmakers.

Zaleska soon seeks help from Dr. Jeffrey Garth, a semi-irritable psychiatrist. This belief that vampirism could be cured through medicine and psychology was a theme of several 1940s Universal horror films. The countess receives little help from psychiatry, but gets the hots for the doctor. He rebuffs her advances, so she takes off for Transylvania with his fiance (Churchill). The doctor, Van Helsing and policeman Sir Basil Humphrey (Emery) take off in pursuit.

I haven't said much about Pichel's role as Sandor, Zaleska's evil servant. He is brilliant, with his white pasty face, eerie accent, and silent grin that seems to know more than he's supposed to. He knows the countess is doomed to continue her undead existence and subtly taunts her throughout the film. Old horror film fans will love this movie, and it's worth owning.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Evil Dead 2: Dead By Dawn

2008-09-30T21:06:00.000-07:00

1987, Color, 85 minutes (less in some foreign versions). Directed by Sam Raimi. Cast includes: Bruce Campbell as Ash, Sarah Berry as Annie Knowby, Dan Hicks as Jake, Ted Raimi as possessed Henrietta Knowby, Denise Bixler as Linda, and John Peaks as Professor Raymond Knowby. Schlock-Meter rating: Eight stars out of a possible 10.

So many reviews like to call Sam Raimi's Evil Dead 2 a comedy, or a tribute to the Three Stooges, and there are some great "gross-out" gags, as well as my favorite comic scene, where Bruce Campbell's Ash, minus his possessed hand, traps it by piling a copy of Hemingway's "A Farewell To Arms" on a container holding the hand. Yes, this film contains a lot of comic parody, and after the first half Campbell plays his part mostly for laughs. And it's true that Raimi's very fast-paced, boom-boom-boom "I'm going to jar the viewer every 30 seconds" seems a tribute to Stooge-like filmmaking. And the excessive gore does desensitize the viewer after a while.

But let's not forget that Evil Dead 2 is a very scary, suspenseful thriller that throws out just about every horror/action plot element that exists. Most work. There are only a few clinkers, and the result is a cinema gem. Critic Roger Ebert pegged it best when he wrote that the film was not in bad taste, but about bad taste. Evil Dead 2 is sort of remake of Raimi's micro-budgeted Evil Dead, but with a little more plot and a twist ending that set up another, even more comic sequel, Army of Darkness. The plot: Ash and his girl Linda (Bixler) decide to squat for a night at a cabin in the Michigan woods. Once there, Ash turns on a tape recorder where a professor, who lives in the cabin, invokes a chant from The Book of the Dead that sends a demon to the cabin. From that point on, all hell breaks loose. Eventually, Ash and a few later arrivals, including the professor's daughter (Berry), are forced to fight it out with the demons.

The film is so fast-paced that you just marvel at the speed and special effects in the film that you forget the plot is pretty light. Director Raimi was destined for bigger assignments (A Simple Plan, Quick and the Dead). He's thrifty and economical. I suspect many minutes were spliced out of the final cut of Evil Dead 2 to maintain the fast pace, horror shocks and, yes, comic timing. Most of the cast is mediocre, except for Campbell, who is outstanding. For the first half of the film, he is largely responsible for carrying the flow of the film, and he uses the right amount of fear, fatigue, anger and outrage to pull it off. There are great visual effects, including a twisted, ominous looking bridge over a high drop, a dancing headless woman-demon, a human snake, a psychopathic hand, a woman being attacked by a tree, a demon's eyeball flying into a screaming mouth, and the most chilling, Ted Raimi's possessed Henrietta Knowby, a thoroughly gruesome old demon hag who hangs out in the cellar.

By all means rent or buy Evil Dead 2. It's well worth the price. However, while it is funny, expect more shivers than chuckles. Also, those who leave the room for a snack will miss several shock scenes. They happen so fast.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Die Monster Die!

2008-09-29T21:13:00.000-07:00

1964, 80 minutes, color, American International Pictures. Directed by Daniel Haller. Starring Boris Karloff as Nahum Witley, Nick Adams as Stephen Reinhart, Freda Jackson as Letitia Witley, Suzan Farmer as Susan Witley, Terrence De Marney as Merwyn and Patrick Magee as Dr. Henderson. Schlock-Meter rating: 4 stars out of 10.

Die, Monster, Die! is one of the more lackluster of AIP’s 1960w Poe/Lovecraft adaptations. The film is supposed to be based on a H.P. Lovecraft’s story Color of Our Space, but really bears no resemblance. There’s virtually no suspense in this slow-moving clinker, but a lot of unintentional laughs as mumbling Nick Adams arrives in England from America to visit his English girlfriend (Farmer) at her forbidding castle with her creepy parents (Karloff and Jackson). It seems that Father Witley (Karloff) has been conducting experiments with radioactive stones, with disastrous results.

The movie starts out with promise. Adams arrives in a small town and can find no one in a tiny English village who will take him to the Witley house. In fact, these villagers are downright rude to old Nick! So, he takes a long walk to the house, and there’s some good atmospheric scenes as Adams passes decayed forests, creepy fences, gates, and is watched by a specter in black. At the house, he’s greeted coldly by a forbidding Karloff, playing his role in a wheelchair.
Then, suddenly, out of nowhere, appears the bubbly Farmer, looking like she just stepped out of an AIP beach movie. She’s totally wrong for the part (there’s no way this vivacious blonde would be the daughter of the dour Karloff) and her presence kills the atmosphere and hope of sustained suspense. Director Haller, who does a competent if uninspired job, tries to substitute shocks for suspense, but even those are weak. Viewers are treated to a black, homicidal specter, hanging objects in the castle that are supposed to be scary, lots of fog, mutant plants, and radiation-mutated humans, including Mother Witley (Jackson) who for no reason turns maniac late in the film.

he best scene in the film shows a mutated tree attempting to encircle a surprised Farmer in his branches, but even that was done a lot better two decades later in Evil Dead.

Adams is also wrong for the part. He reminds me of a Marlon Brando wannabe. He would seem more comfortable battling Johnny Friendly on a loading dock than matching wits with mad scientist Boris Karloff. Karloff is fine, but isn’t really given much to do. He’s in a lot less scenes than Adams and he mostly whines, threatens or talks of his need to see his wife. The final scene, where a green, ringing, radioactive Karloff rises from his wheelchair and goes after Adams and Farmer is pure camp and will inspire a lot of chuckles from viewers.

Be forewarned: There’s no scares in Die, Monster, Die!, but if you are a fan of AIP horrors or Karloff, it will hold your interest, barely.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Isle of the Dead

2008-09-25T06:53:00.000-07:00

Isle of the Dead, 1945, RKO Radio Pictures, 71 minutes, black and white. Directed by Mark Robson, Produced by Val Lewton. Starring Boris Karloff as General Nikolas Pherides; Ellen Drew as Thea; Marc Cramer as Oliver Davis; and Katherine Emery as Mrs. St. Aubyn. Schlock-Meter rating: 8 stars out of 10.

The mid 1940s was the beginning of a transition period for thrillers. The great Universal monsters were now B pictures, and soon to be relegated as fodder for comedy teams. The terrors of the nuclear age to come would bring a new type of horror star, Godzilla and various over-sized insects crawling across movie screens. But in between that change came several great horror films from Val Lewton, who knew how to exploit the supernatural and make the spines of World War II movie-goers chill.

Isle of the Dead is about our worst fears, death, the plague and being buried alive. Producer Lawton and director Mark Robson are old hands at slowly building a story, creating unease, and then slamming the viewer with a terrifying climax. There is a scene, about two-thirds of the way through, that takes this film from suspense to terror. An invalid woman (Katherine Emery) fears being buried alive. It's a legitimate fear since she suffers from spells where she appears dead. She suffers a spell and is presumed dead and put in a coffin. In a crypt, the camera pans to her coffin. She screams, and desperate clawing is heard inside. It's a scary payoff to a well-made chiller.

The plot involves a dour Greek general (Karloff) and an American reporter (Cramer) who visit an isolated island near the front of a war. They spend the night with an anthropologist and his several guests (all of whom have been forced to the island to avoid the war). A British guest (veteran cult actor Skelton Knaggs) is discovered dead. A doctor decrees it to be the plague. The general orders everyone confined to the house. One by one the plague starts to claim its victims.

As mentioned, the film drips in atmosphere. The first scenes show Karloff and the reporter walking through a battlefield strewn with the bodies of dead soldiers. There's a creepy sight of suffering soldiers hauling away wagons full of the dead for disposal. As Karloff explains, it must be done immediately to avoid the plague. The house on the island has a claustrophobic feel, none of the rooms are too large. The island is dark, foggy and creepy, the crypt dark and forbidding.
Karloff does a very capable job as a villain who can still inspire some sympathy. The heartless, but courtly Greek general who places "rule of law" over mercy is a study of extremism from two sides. When the plague starts, Karloff's general scorns the superstitions of an elderly Greek maid, preferring to put his trust in the doctor. But when the plague claims the doctor, a disillusioned Karloff switches beliefs. Still the extremist, he allies with the maid, and with frightening intensity, believes a young woman named Thea (Ellen Drew) is possessed with an evil spirit. They plot to kill Thea.

Today very few horror films rely on atmosphere to turn suspense into horror. Most try to use foreground shots (like John Carpenter's Halloween) to create tension. Some succeed. Most don't. Too many filmmakers err by throwing away characterization, thinking that a quick knife killing serves as a payoff to a lazy viewer. Val Newton's Isle of the Dead is a reminder that creating a scary film is a gradual process that takes time and care.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: What! No Beer?

2008-09-24T09:25:00.000-07:00

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The Dark Horse

2008-09-21T19:56:00.000-07:00

The Dark Horse, 1932, 75 minutes, B&W, First National Pictures, directed by Alfred E. Green. Starring Guy Kibbee as Zachary Hicks, Warren William as Hal S. Blake, Bette Davis as Kay Russell, Vivienne Osborne as Maybelle Blake, Hal's ex-wife, Berton Churchill as William A. Underwood and Frank McHugh as Joe. Rating: 7 stars out of 10.

---

A quick note: "The Dark Horse" is one of those wonderful 1930s programmers that would sit neglected in a film library (or perhaps sit seldom seen in a Bette Davis film collection DVD) if it wasn't for Turner Classic Movies. Film-lovers are in debt to TMC, which daily offers an invaluable history lesson of cinema with its offerings.

Now, on to "The Dark Horse." This is a delightful satire of politics that proves that, even 76 years ago, we weren't fooled by the absurdities of the political arena. Veteran actor Guy Kibbee plays, Zachary Hicks, a bumbling fool of a man who is accidentally nominated by his "Progressive" Party to be governor of an unnamed state after the two front-runners are deadlocked.

A party secretary, Kay Russell, (a very young Bette Davis) recommends that a fast-talking, charming cad of a man Hal S. Blake (forgotten leading man Warren William) be bailed out of jail -- where's he sitting due to unpaid child support -- to run Hicks' campaign. Blake does a masterful job, all while trying to stay one step ahead of his scheming, vindictive ex-wife (Vivienne Osborne) and romancing wary secretary Russell.

The key to the film, though, is the dumbness and naivete of 50sh Hays, thrust out of nowhere. Kibbee is perfect in the role. He provides understated humor in his misunderstanding of situations and constant "yes ... and maybe no" to any question. William's political operative is uncannyingly on-target, you could almost picture him spinning on cable news shows today. Davis hasn't much to do but viewers can sense her screen presence that would lead her to stardom. A fun, fast-paced film that still has relevance today, it's well worth watching when it's on TCM.

Notes: Kibbee was a very much in demand character actor and B-film starrer in the 30s and early 40s. He is best known as the corrupt governor controlled by Jim Taylor in Frank Capra's 1939 classic "Mr. Smith Goes to Washington." He also starred in the only sound version of Sinclair Lewis' tale "Babbitt." Kibbee is great as Babbitt in that seldom-seen 1934 film, which aired recently on TCM. Frank McHugh, who played William's political sidekick, is best known as Father Tim Dowd in the 1944 Bing Crosby classic "Going My Way."

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Frankenstein Conquers the World

2008-09-19T07:03:00.000-07:00

Frankenstein Conquers the World, 1965, Toho, Color. Director: Ishiro Honda; Cast includes Nick Adams, Kumi Mizuno, Tadao Takashima and Kuji Furuhata. 87 minutes in most prints. Seven out of 10 stars on the Schlock-Meter.

This is a fun film that doesn't fail to deliver cheesy thrills with a fast-growing boy Frankenstein (Furuhata) eating everything in sight and battling a monster named Baragon at the end. Scientists (Adams, Mizuno and Takashima) battle to save the boy monster so he "can be studied."

The FXs are cheesy, with the boy Frankenstein looking pretty silly on miniature sets and with overhead camera shots. The battle scenes are fake but fun, with a rubber monster flipping around a lot. The dubbing is as bad as expected. The most campy dubbing involves a German scientist, who sports an accent so bogus that even "Hogan's Heroes" would be ashamed to use it.

The bizarre plot is as follows: Late in World War 2, the heart of the Frankenstein monster is stolen from the lab of Dr. Frankenstein by Axis soldiers. It makes its way to Japan, where it survives the atomic blast in Hiroshima. It then somehow attaches itself to a small boy who survives the Hiroshima blast. He grows and grows and grows. There are a lot of twists on Mary Shelley's legend: Frankenstein can never die, and if you cut off a limb, it grows again!

This film, corny as it is, can be at times compelling. It takes place in Hiroshima and the horror of the Hiroshima bombing hangs over the plot. Star Adams's doctor is an American so horrified by what happened in Hiroshima that he's chosen to travel across the world and treat those still suffering. Frankenstein Conquers the World, while a misleading title, is a silly film, but it's a cut above its genre. The wild plot and classic Toho effects make it worth a rental and a tape if you can catch it on TV. I saw it on American Movie Classics.

Notes: According to an article in Cult Movies magazine, stars Adams and Mizuno had a brief affair; The film was released in the USA by Henry Saperstein's UPA company; There was more than one ending filmed (the ending for this review has the monster sinking into the earth); Toho made one more film with the Frankenstein monster, War of the Gargantuas, starring Russ Tamblyn.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Scrooge (1935)

2008-09-17T18:39:00.000-07:00

Scrooge, 1935, 78 minutes, B&W, British. Directed by Henry Edwards. Starring Sir. Seymour Hicks as Ebenezer Scrooge, Donald Calthrop as Bob Cratchit, Robert Cochran as Fred, Mary Glynne as Belle and Phillip Frost as Tiny Tim. Rating: Seven stars out of 10.

This very creaky British version of Dickens' A Christmas Tale can't hold a candle to the 1951, 1984 and 1999 versions, but it's better than the 1938 Hollywood adaptation. It stars Hicks as Scrooge. The British actor had the part down pat. He had played Scrooge for decades on the British stage. Nevertheless, he plays Scrooge as a crochety old crank, which is one of your reviewer's pet peeves. I prefer Scrooge to be played as a smug, self satisfied superior sort, such as Sims, Scott and Stewart portrayed Dickens' miser in other adaptations. The result is that Scrooge's experience is a startling comeuppance for him. Like Saul of Tarsus, he's literally brought to his senses and scared straight through divine interference. But with an old crochety Scrooge, all he goes through seems like a scolding that a child would take from an elder.

But still, this is a must-see version for fans. The London sets are simply marvelous. You can feel Victorian England in this film better than any other version. Also, a pleasant surprise is Calthrop as Bob Cratchit. He is the only Bob Cratchit that's able to stand up to Scrooge. Indeed, early in the film, he mutters of Scrooge's miserliness when denied coal for the fire. The other actors are adequate for their roles. One chilling scene has Tiny Tim (Frost) laying dead on a bed for Scrooge to see during the third spirit visit.

There are some odd twists to the film. Not much is told about Scrooge's childhood, and a really strange scene is with Marley's ghost. To the audience he is invisible, though it's clear Scrooge can see him. There is a scene early in the film, inserted for some reason, of Queen Victoria receiving a Christmas toast from London's leading citizens. The final scene where a changed Scrooge fools Cratchit and gives him a raise has the pair taking the day off, rather than having some smoking Christmas bishop to drink. Scrooge is a curio of early British filmmaking and certainly worth a rental for the holidays. For decades this film was literally out of circulation, but with the advent of video it enjoyed a comeback and can now usually be found on TV each holiday season and can be purchased. It can also be seen for free on the Web.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Curse of the Mummy's Tomb

2008-09-16T08:43:00.000-07:00

Curse of the Mummy's Tomb, 1964, Hammer, 81 minutes, color. Directed by Michael Carreras. Starring Terance Morgan as Adam Beauchamp/Be, son of Rameses VIII, Ronald Howard as John Bray, Fred Clark as Alexander King, Jeanne Roland as Annette Dubois, George Pastell as Hashmi Bey, Jack Gwylliam as Sir Giles Dalrymple, and Dickie Morgan as the Mummy (Ra-Antef). Schlock-Meter rating: 4 stars out of 10.

The Curse of the Mummy's Tomb is a very poor sequel to Hammer's much better The Mummy, starring Christopher Lee. The film suffers from a dull plot, too much talk, a boring shambling mummy and a really annoying female lead (Roland), who spends much of film practicing a really bogus Parisian accent.

The plot: An expedition travels to Egypt and digs up the remains of a slain prince. The leader of the expedition is murdered. His daughter, her fiance (Howard), and the others in the party decide to return to London and feature the mummy as a sideshow act, charging 10 cents a look (it's 1900, by the way.) Of course the mummy follows them and starts to exact its revenge on those who desecrated his grave.

The film boasts a couple of shocks, including hands being chopped off and a man's head squashed (implied, not seen). But the film is just so talky, with heavy-handed direction by Carreras. Nothing happens for long periods of time and we are treated to long stretches of dialogue, which as any film fan knows, is often used as a crutch to pad out a weak film. In this film's case, it's already a brief 81 minutes, but seems longer.

Even when the mummy appears, it's a disappointment. No attempt is made to humanize the monster. He just kills. Roland as the female lead is horrible. She's one of the most faithless characters in a movie and quickly goes from mourning her father's death to constant giggling.

Veteran actor Morgan is fairly decent as the villain who steals Roland from her fiance and hides a terrible secret. The most lively actor in the film may be the Carnival-like business huckster Alexander King (Clark), who outrages many by turning the mummy into a sideshow. Clark carries the roll with pizzaz, but he's killed off too early by the mummy. If this movie's on TV and you can't find anything else to watch, it will pass the time. Otherwise, go find a better mummy movie at the video store.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: House of Wax

2008-09-11T21:45:00.000-07:00

House of Wax, 1953, 90 minutes, Warner Brothers, Color. Directed by Andre De Toth. Starring Vincent Price as Professor Henry Jarrod, Frank Lovejoy as Lt. Tom Brennan, Phyllis Kirk as Sue Allen, and Charles Bronson as Igor. Schlock-Meter rating: 5 stars out of 10.

The real problem with House of Wax is that it's dull. Vincent Price does a fine job as the mad, scarred professor who wants to wax over many humans in his new museum of horrors, but the film is stagey, with lots of talk and few shocks.

House of Wax also fails to achieve any real cult status for another reason, which is a left-handed compliment. It's too competent a film technically to be corny. The sets are nice. The direction OK. The special effects adequate, and the color nice and unfaded.

The ending bumps House of Wax's Schlock-meter rating a tad. It's quite suspenseful to watch Price casually preparing to murder before being stopped and falling to his death into his own vat of wax. Movie fans will enjoy seeing a very young Charles Bronson in the role of Igor, a mute confederate of Price's.

Still, House of Wax is just too talky and dull in stretches to recommend as a rental. Catch it when it airs on AMC cable, and enjoy a master of the genre, Vincent Price, perform in his usual above-average manner.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Bowery at Midnight

2008-09-10T19:59:00.000-07:00

Bowery at Midnight, 61 minutes, B&W, 1942, Monogram. Directed by Wallace Fox. Starring Bela Lugosi as Professor Brenner/Karl Wagner, John Archer as Richard Dennison, Dave O'Brien as Pete Crawford, Wanda McKay as Judy Malvern, Lew Kelly as Doc Brooks Wheeler Oakman as Stratton, J. Farrell MacDonald as Capt. Mitchell and Tom Neal as Frankie Mills. Schlock-meter rating: Nine stars out of 10.

Bowery at Midnight is Bela Lugosi's finest low-budget Monogram chiller. It's almost as good as PRC's Devil Bat and better than his other 1940s cheapies and starring roles with RKO. One strength is the dual roles that Lugosi plays. His transformation from kindly professor and skid row shelter worker to sociopathic, merciless gangster killer is chilling. It was his most menacing role of the 1940s. The plot, like any Monogram offering, is truly bizarre: Lugosi plays a criminology professor named Brenner. By all standards he's a success. At night he assumes the role of Karl Wagner, kindly skid row shelter operator. But that's a cover for his real activity, which is master criminal.

Keeping skid row criminals in his basement (including a drug-addicted doctor) and killing them off when he finds replacements, Wagner robs several jewel stores and commits several murders. He recruits a baby faced killer as his prize criminal but soon learns he's not so easy to control. Pretty Wanda McKay works at the shelter as his assistant, Judy Malvern. She knows nothing of his criminal activities. Things start to unravel for Brenner/Wagner when one of his students (who just happens to be Judy's fiance) ends up at the shelter doing research for a class project and recognizes his professor. Lugosi brutally and quickly has him shot, but the police, with the help of Judy, discover the connection between Brenner and Wagner. While Lugosi tries to escape, he discovers a horrifying surprise in the basement.

Lugosi, as mentioned, is great in his dual roles. McKay is beautiful and a capable actress, and the ubiquitous J. Farrell MacDonald does his usual fine job in his staple role, that of police captain. The film is a lean, mean 61 minutes and sort of resembles a TV detective drama of today. The scenes of New York's skid row Bowery section will provide nostalgia for many viewers. The film is full of plot twists, perhaps a few too many for its low budget. However, Bowery at Midnight is Lugosi at his B-movie best, and it's a must have for a film library.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Surgikill

2008-09-07T18:13:00.000-07:00

In 1988, underground filmmaker Andy Milligan embarked on directing his final full-length feature film. Media Arts Productions LLC produced it. The film was to be a black comedy set in a small community hospital called Goode Community Hospital, named after Dr. Grace Goode, a character in the film played by Darlene Van Harlingen, also known as Bouvier. Her husband, John Van Harlingen, was the executive producer. This film is quite departure from the canon of other Milligan films, which were over the top sex and gore epics. The film was shot in an abandoned neighborhood clinic near downtown Los Angeles.

Dr. Goode is desperately trying to keep her small hospital in functioning order as some of her staff and patients are being murdered one by one. Not to mention that she is constantly being hounded to sell the hospital for other greedy business prospects.

The film is full of over-the-top gags and gimmicks that are occasionally funny and sometimes overstated and juvenile. For example, one particularly funny scene, at least to me, shows an old woman arriving at the hospital reception desk with a bedpan stuck to her butt. Two hospital orderlies attempt to pry it off her as she stands in complete embarrassment. Other scenes show characters being hit over the head with a bedpan, or splashed with urine from bedpans. These scenes quickly become overstated. Some of the characters constantly repeating: "We care about the people we care for," quickly gets exhausted too.

Another particularly funny scene shows an old woman lying on her back in the operating room with an arrow sticking out of her butt. Apparently her husband had mistaken her for an archery target and accidentally shot her in the butt. Perhaps her husband was on a hunting trip with Dick Cheney at the time, long before he became Vice President?

A latter scene in the same operating room has Dr. Harvey and Dr. Schweitzer performing a gallbladder surgery. They can’t seem to find the patient’s gallbladder, so they end up tearing out several of the organs from the patient. This particular scene has some connection to earlier Milligan films because it is intentionally and graphically violent, even if the organs used in the scene are obviously unconvincing and fake. Herschel Gordon Lewis would be proud of this scene.
A connection this film has to earlier Milligan films is the nurse-receptionist character and drag queen Ronna, who is very similar to the drag queen in Milligan’s excellent Fleshpot On 42nd Street, played by Neil Flanagan. Ronna is later revealed to be Robert Goode, who is Grace Goode’s cousin and the murderer in the film. Robert is murdering hospital staff and patients in hopes to inherit the family hospital for himself.

Nurse Ronna and Dr. Grace Goode are the two characters I enjoyed the most, and felt the audience would have the greatest connection to. The young, fresh out of medical school Dr. Schweitzer, seems a bit unconvincing to me as he constantly sucks on a baby’s pacifier, implying that he is young, inexperienced and "wet behind the ears." This character gets a bit annoying too. Many of the actors in the film are way over the top in their acting, and frequently shout their lines, much like in an early John Waters film.

Is Surgikill a great film? No, but who cares? I like movies to occasionally be campy, over-the-top and unbelievable, otherwise I would not be writing articles for this web site. Is Surgikill Andy Milligan’s best film? Probably not. I place my vote with Torture Dungeon, which I regard as his greatest masterpiece. Still, any die-hard fan of Andy Milligan cannot afford to miss this entry in his filmography. It may not have the same low-budget, gritty charm as his films of the late 1960s and early 1970s, but it is worthy of a viewing, if only to see what his last film looks like before his death in 1991. Like Milligan’s earlier films, I am confident that Surgikill will continue to gain a strong cult following as the years go by. Fans are eagerly awaiting a DVD release soon.

-- Steve D. Stones

Review: Curse of the Demon

2008-09-03T21:26:00.000-07:00

Curse of the Demon, 1957, 95 minutes, B&W, British. Directed by Jacques Tourneur. Starring Dana Andrews as Dr. John Holden, Peggy Cummins as Joanna Harrington, Liam Redmond as Mark O'Brien, Niall MacGinnis as Dr. Julian Carswell, Maurice Denham as Professor Harrington, and Brian Wilde as Rand Hobart. Schlock-Meter rating: 9 stars out of 10.

Curse of the Demon is based on a short story, Casting the Runes, by M.R. James, a British writer who gained fame depicting horror in a subtle manner that often left a victim's fate to the imagination. The story is about an American psychologist (Andrews) who travels to England to try and expose the leader of a devil worshipping cult (MacGinnis) as a fraud. On the way, Andrews' character, Dr. John Holden, becomes acquainted with Joanna Harrington, the niece of a colleague of Holden's, Professor Harrington (Denham), who was murdered while investigating MacGinnis' cult leader, named Julian Carswell.

Holden's a cheerful skeptic, and he's amused that so many of his colleagues believe that Carswell can really raise demons. He gets to know Carswell, who informs Holden that he will die in three days. Before he dies, the cult leader informs Holden, he will suffer great anxiety. From that point on the suspense builds as evidence grows that Carswell can do what he says, and Holden slowly grows to realize that he's battling a terror he must learn to believe in.

MacGinnis, as the evil cult leader Carswell, is magnificent. He is a contrast, always full of arrogance, but able to apppear as cheerful as Kris Kringle. However, within seconds, he can move to anger, revealing his lack of humanity, yet never losing his courtly manner. Andrews is in a role where he slowly has to change his beliefs, and he does a good job of trying to resist what his instincts tell him can't be. Director Tourneur builds suspense with little surprises, such as Holden discovering that his date book appointments are all torn off after the 28th of the month, the night he is slated to die. Wilde is wonderfully creepy in a small role as a catatonic ex-disciple of Carswell's who is brought back to consciousness for a short time.

Curse of the Demon is a classic of its genre, and recommended for any cult film library. One minor quibble: The demon in the film should have been implied, rather than shown. It's adequate as a fright piece, but ultimately not as scary as our own thoughts can conjure it to be. Notes: In Britain, the film is titled Night of the Demon and runs 82 minutes; Liam Redmond, who plays a colleague of Andrews in the film, starred several years later as a typesetter in the Don Knotts semi-cult ghostly comedy The Ghost and Mr. Chicken.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The Slime People

2008-09-02T20:41:00.000-07:00

The Slime People, 1963, B&W, 76 minutes, Joseph F. Robertson Productions, directed by Robert Hutton. Starring Hutton as Tom Gregory, Les Tremayne as Norman Tolliver, Robert Burton as Professor Galbraith, Susan Hart as Lisa Galbraith, Judee Morton as Bonnie Galbraith, and William Boyce as Cal Johnson. Schlock-meter rating: 6 stars out of 10.

I wasn’t expecting expecting to enjoy this ultra-low budget cheapie in 1963 from future porn director Joe Robertson. I had just read Mondo Cult 1, where Brad Linaweaver really trashed the film. It’s not a great film, but it’s a lot of fun. The plot: A TV newsman (Hutton) crash lands near Los Angeles and discovers that things are well, silent and different. He’s picked up by a professor (Burton) and his two giggly daughters. The professor explains that underground nuclear testing has caused the underground-dwelling “slime people” to come up and take over. They have built a hard-t0-penetrate dome (shades of The Simpsons film) over the LA area. The slime people sort of resemble creatures from the black lagoon on steroids. Areas infected by the slime people are in a dark haze. (This occasionally makes it hard on viewers trying to follow the action).
The four eventually pick up a gung-ho army man (Boyce) and a smarmy writer (Guess who dies?). Most of the film is talk, but there are cool scenes of our heroes battling slime people and dealing with looters. Surprisingly, director Hutton does a good job of making LA seem deserted, although the film lingers too long at a grocery store (probably due to its low budget). The four young people also quickly pair off in a “me-Tarzan, you-Jane” style. The secret to battling the slimy baddies is finally discovered.
The acting is OK and the film doesn’t drag too much. The special effects are really not that bad and the film has a hokey charm. OK, the hero just happening to run into the professor and having it all explained is a little lame. It would have been better to have him be alone for the first fifth of the film, discover the slime people himself and then hook up with the others. But I like this film. I’m surprised it hasn’t played on Utah;s UEN Channel 9 Sci-Fi Friday. It’d be a good addition.
Notes: Robertson also produced the ultra-cheapie The Crawling Hand, which starred Alan Hale Jr. of Gilligan’s Island fame. Cult director Ed Wood starred in his porn films Love Feast and Mrs. Stone’s Thing. Both are reputed to be horrendously bad films. It’s a pity Wood didn’t work on The Slime People or Crawling Hand. The film was spoofed on Mystery Science Theater 3000.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: House of Frankenstein

2008-09-02T06:40:00.000-07:00

House of Frankenstein, 1944, Universal, B&W, 71 minutes. Directed by Erle C. Kenton. Starring Boris Karloff as Dr. Gustav Niemann, J. Carrol Naish as Daniel, Lon Chaney Jr. as Lawrence Talbot, John Carradine as Dracula, Lionel Atwill as Inspector Arnz, George Zucco as Prof. Bruno Lampini, Peter Coe as Karl HussmanAnne Gwynne as Rita Hussman, Elena Verdugo as llonka and Glenn Strange as the Frankenstein monster. Schlock-meter rating: Seven and one-half stars out of 10.

House of Frankenstein is a fun, exciting monster-fest that provides a few chills largely due to the performance of Boris Karloff as mad scientist Dr. Gustav Niemann, who escapes from prison after 15 years with a hunchback assistant named Daniel (Naish). Niemann, a wannabe Frankenstein, was thrown in jail for trying to put a man's brain in the body of a dog. He's brooded for 15 years, and once out, is eager for revenge against those who sent him to jail. He kills the owner of a small traveling horror show (Zucco, in a great cameo), resuscitates Dracula (Carradine) and manages to kill one of his past adversaries. This done, he abandons Dracula (who tries to kidnap a young bride (Gwynne) to be killed and Niemann and Daniel take off for another village to exact revenge.

They pick up an abused gypsy girl who the hunchback Daniel quickly falls in love with. They make their way to Frankenstein's old village, where while he isn't settling scores with old enemies, Niemann finds the frozen bodies of the Frankenstein monster (Strange) and the wolfman Lawrence Talbot (Chaney Jr.). The wolfman, upset at being revived, nevertheless agrees to help Niemann since the doctor promises to end his curse. Of such bizarre plots were delightful horror films of the 1940s created. It's fun to watch. By the way, the cute gypsy girl falls in love with Talbot, thereby frustrating Daniel and turning him against the mad Dr. Niemann. Also, the villagers start to catch on to the the inhumane science occurring at the destroyed castle.

Karloff is chilling in his role. He appears to be without conscience. In an early scene he casually grabs a jailer by the neck and chokes him until given a piece of chalk. His talent to frighten audiences lasted a lifetime as those who have seen the 1960s films Targets and Black Sabbath can attest to. Chaney is whiny, but effective as the wolfman. Carradine underplays Dracula, but does a good job, although it's tough to compete with Lugosi's legacy. Strange, as the Frankenstein monster, is barely in the film, but he does an capable job. The film is tight and fast-paced, and runs at a lean 71 minutes. It's a fun cult film and definitely worth a rental.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Revenge of Frankenstein

2008-08-28T06:44:00.001-07:00

The Revenge of Frankenstein, 1958, color, Hammer, 90 minutes (U.S. version). Directed by Terence Fisher. Starring Peter Cushing as Dr. "Stein" (Frankenstein). Francis Matthews as Dr. Hans Kleve, Eunice Gayson as Margaret Conrad, Michael Gwynn as Karl as a synthetic man and Oscar Quitak as Karl (before). Schlock-meter rating: 9 stars out of 10.

Hammer films can be somewhat of an acquired taste. Often it will seem that the cast of Mansfield Park has suddenly appeared in a conventional horror film. But I confess to being a big fan of this British horror genre. I love the raw horror of Dracula being confronted by English gentlemen warriors. The Revenge of Frankenstein, a sequel to the Curse of Frankenstein. is an efficient, compact tale with beautiful sets and scenes and marvelous restrained performances by Cushing as Dr. Frankenstein and Gwynne as the suffering synthetic man.

The plot: Dr. Frankenstein avoids death in one portion of Eastern Europe and sets up shop far way under the name of Dr. Stein. He quickly becomes the most popular doctor in town, much to the chagrin of his colleagues. A former student (Matthews) recognizes Frankenstein, but rather than turn him in, works with him to create a synthetic man (Gwynne). Of course, plans go awry and several murders occur by the monster before Stein's true identity is revealed. There is a twist ending that is a little hard to swallow, but it sets everything up nicely for a sequel.

Matthews as Cushing's confederate Dr. Hans Kleve is just window dressing, as is a nurse (Gayson) who inadvertenly sets the monster free. This is Cushing's show, and he is marvelous. He portrays a truly evil, amoral man, but his charisma, energy and controlled emotional performance makes the audience cheer for him. Fisher's direction is as economical as a Don Siegel film. He keeps the film moving at a fast pace and virtually no scenes are wasted.

Even Dr. Frankenstein's motive for creating a synthetic man appears pure at first. It's to place the brain of a dwarf (Quitak) in a "perfect body." However, when the brain and body don't mix and the suffering creation (Gwynne) goes mad with pain and fury, the doctor is curiously cold, revealing his icy interior. As mentioned, Gwynne is great in conveying the suffering of the monster and its agony that it cannot control his pain or actions. The Revenge of Frankenstein is a winner, and deserves a spot in any cult film collection. Notes: British version runs 94 minutes. Film was originally banned in Sweden.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Dracula: Prince of Darkness

2008-08-27T04:35:00.000-07:00

Dracula: Prince of Darkness, 1966, 80 minutes, Hammer, Color. Directed by Terence Fisher. Starring Christopher Lee as Dracula, Barbara Shelley as Helen Kent, Andrew Keir as Father Sandor, Francis Matthews as Charles Kent, Suzan Farmer as Diana Kent, Charles ÿBudÿ Tingwell as Alan Kent, Thorley Waters as Ludwig, Philip Latham as Klove and John Maxim as the coach driver. Schlock-Meter rating: 9 stars out of 10.

This is a magnificent horror film. Two English couples are vacationing in Eastern Europe. They are warned by a priest (Keir, who is great) to stay away from Carlsbad, and above all, an unmarked castle. Of course, they ignore the priest's advice and enter the castle. There, with the help of an evil assistant (Latham), Count Dracula (Lee) is resurrected from dust and the night turns to terror for the couples.

The acting is superb, and director Fisher's economical pacing prevents the film from dragging and maintains suspense. Keir, as Father Sandor, is a great vampire hunter, and carries much of the film with his commanding presence. Barbara Shelley as the ill-fated Helen Kent, undergoes an effective transition within the film. The first half of the film she's a repressed, shrewish early-middle-aged wife. However, after falling prey to Dracula's curse, Shelley becomes a beautiful, passionate woman with full cleavage. She literally looks 15 years younger and deserves credit for pulling off the transformation. Waters as Ludwig, an imbecile who helps Dracula, is a capable Renfield clone, and Latham is sinister and eerie as Dracula's living servant Klove.

The film opens with a final shot from Hammer's classic The Horror of Dracula, where Peter Cushing destroys Lee's Dracula. It was the third Hammer Dracula film, but Lee's second playing the man with a cape. Lee produces scares, despite never uttering a word in the film. He is sinister, yet commanding. Not human, he prefers to communicate with snarls and shrieks of rage or triumph. I won't give away the entire ending, but Dracula meets his fate in a rather unusual manner.

One minor quibble: I wish the Hammer films were shot in black and white rather than color. I understand that it worked well in the 1960s, but today the Hammer films are a bit dated because of the color. They would appear fresher if black and white. The forest settings appear realistic and the castle is suitably creepy. It's a must-rent cult film. Better yet, buy it for your collection.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Godzilla 2000

2008-08-26T08:33:00.000-07:00

Godzilla 2000, 2000, about 90 minutes, color, Toho films, Japan Distributed in the U.S. by Columbia Tristar. Directed by Takao Okawara. Starring Kitagawa Tsutomo, Hiroshi Abe, Takehiro Murata, Mayu Suzuki and Shiro Sano. Rated PG. Rating on a scale of 10: 8.

When I was a child, I saw a lot of Saturday matinee thrillers. I remember really enjoying reissues of the Marx Brothers' Go West and The Seventh Voyage of Sinbad. But I never saw a Godzilla film. I didn't lose any sleep over it as a child, but, when Toho's latest Godzilla flick, Godzilla 2000, opened in August (2000), I persuaded my skeptical wife to catch a matinee at one of those new mega-cinema mall (this place was showing over 30 films). So we settled down with some popcorn, and I put my feet up in the nearly empty theater and waited for some bad dubbing, some fairly cheesy monsters and Godzilla's distinct Japanese shriek.

And that's exactly what I got. Godzilla is cheesy and at times ridiculous, but still, it's a lot of fun. It doesn't try to take itself seriously, and as a result, provides great Saturday matinee popcorn-gobbling fun. When it comes out in video, it's a must for cult fans to rent this film, microwave the popcorn, and catch it late night on the tube. Here's the plot: The Godzilla Prediction Network (I'm not making that name up) is in a race with Japan's Crisis Control Intelligence Agency to find Godzilla, who occasionally rampages the countryside. The Prediction wants to contain Godzilla and study the creature. The Crisis Control bureaucrats, led by one of the most stone-faced actors in film history, want to kill Japan's most famous beast. In between there's a nosy newspaper reporter trying to get the perfect photo of Godzilla. Somewhere in the middle of all this, a huge rock is lifted from the bottom of the sea to sunlight, thereby resurrecting a huge alien monster. Guess who gets the fight it?

There are many moments of camp in this monster-fest. Besides the ridiculous dubbing and still-poor Toho effects, the scene where the woman reporter is chewed out by her editor is fun to watch. It seems she was too close to the Godzilla, and the radiation wipes out a good print! The final, dubbed line in the film is a howler, and I won't give it away.

There's a lot of action, and a lot of Godzilla in Godzilla 2000, and that makes it a winner and a must-see for cult film lovers. As mentioned, after it leaves theaters, it's best seen late at night, with beer or pop and a lot of popcorn. You'll laugh a lot, but you'll also enjoy the story, and the energetic rubber monsters flailing away. After watching this film, I'm sure Toho will bring back the big guy for a sequel every few years.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Space Probe Taurus

2008-08-20T22:11:00.000-07:00

Space Probe Taurus, 1965, American Independent, B&W, 73 minutes. Directed by Leonard Katzman. Starring Francine York as Dr. Lisa Wayne, James B. Brown as Colonel Hank Stevens, Baynes Barron as Dr. John Andros and Russ Bender as Dr. Paul Martin. Schlock-Meter rating:4 stars out of 10.

AIP had high hopes for Space Probe Taurus. Initially planned as a theatrical release, a sequel was in pre-development while the futuristic sci-fi was being filmed. After Leonard Katzman (son of 40s cheapie mogul Sam Katzman) finished the film, AIP execs watched the film. Plans for a theater release were scrapped. The sequel was put on the shelf permanently, and Space Probe Taurus was quickly sold to television. It was a smart move. Space Probe Taurus is so corny although it has a fun goofiness. There is less than 7 or 8 minutes of action in the entire film. The actors talk and talk and talk and talk and still talk. Whenever our stars meet any space monsters (and they're pretty pathetic) the action never rises higher than a Buster Crabbe serial. The sets and FXs are awful. A talented high school class could do a better job. The script is cliche-ridden with stock characters (feminist lady scientist, gruff chauvinist commandeer who will win over the girl, money-grubbing wise-cracking crewman who will of course die, and elderly scientist egghead).

The plot: It's supposed to be roughly around the year 2000, although everyone looks and acts like its the 1960s. Memo to filmmakers: When attempting a futuristic fantasy, try to have space exploration equipment that post dates 1960. Hope 1, a state-of-the-art space ship, is off on a journey to probe the universe. The search is for a planet that humans may one day colonize. The spaceship and its journey through outer space are accomplished with childish FXs that would embarrass any four-year-old Star Wars fan. It's obvious the ship is a 12-inch model and outer space looks like a blackboard with shiny stuff attached to it. Meteorites resemble toasted marshmallows. Yet, for some reason, as I have mentioned, it's goofy fun.

Before our heroes find the planet they are looking for, they intrude on a space station run by a lone alien with a face full of granola. When the alien understandably attacks the U.S. space soldiers they quickly kill him and blow up his ship. That is probably the best scene in the film! Eventually, our boring heroes, after a lot of talk and a definitely-uncool-in-2000 Me Tarzan, You Jane romance between Colonel Stevens (Brown) and Dr. Lisa Wayne (York), find an inhabitable planet. The wisecracking Dr. Andros (Barron) loses his life battling another alien, and our heroes, as they return home, name the planet Andros 1, in his memory.

Notes: Director Leonard Katzman rebounded from this mediocre effort to be a huge success in television. He created, among other hits, Wild Wild West, Walker Texas Ranger and Dallas. Like many independent films, Space Probe Taurus has had other titles, including First Woman Into Space, Flight Beyond the Sun, Space Monster and Voyage Into the Sun. American Movie Classics aired the film twice during the month of April 2002. If one searches enough, Space Probe Taurus can generally be bought via the Internet

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The Ape Man

2008-08-19T22:18:00.000-07:00

Like any low-budget film, there are amusing contradictions. Why does Lugosi have an accent, and his sister doesn't? Also, why doesn't anyone seem to notice the ape-like Lugosi and his pet ape traipsing through the city? Of course, suspension of disbelief is a requirement to fully enjoy a Monogram film. So just sit back and take in the show. It's a fun hour of escapism and a great treat for those who enjoy the old C and B horror films. Notes: The film's shooting title was They Creep in the Night. In England, it was titled Lock Your Doors. There is a nostalgic reference to the times when Currie chides Ford for being 4F, and consequently not serving in World War II. He retorts that he's scheduled to enlist at the end of the month.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Plague of the Zombies

2008-08-17T16:56:00.000-07:00

Plague of the Zombies, 1966, British film, directed by John Gilling, Hammer Films, 91 minutes, starring Andre Morell as Sir James Forbes, Diane Clare as Sylvia Forbes, Brook Williams as Dr. Peter Thompson, Jacqueline Pearce as Alice Mary Thompson, John Carson as Squire Clive Hamilton, Alexander Davion as Denver and Michael Ripper as Sgt. Jack Swift. Schlock-meter ranking: Eight stars out of 10.

"Plague of the Zombies" is a superior Hammer entry from the mid-1960s. A very English gentleman doctor (Morell) heads to the small British village, Cornwall, with his daughter (Clare) to visit a protege (Williams) who is the local doctor. Mysterious deaths are occurring. The next to die is the local doctor's wife (Pearce). It's soon discovered that the graves are devoid of corpses. To solve the case, Morell and the local police sergeant (Ripper) reach back to Carribbean lore and the local, very rich squire (Hamilton) who also has an abandoned tin mine ... or so everyone thinks.

Prior to George A. Romero' "Night of the Living Dead," most zombie films involved Haitian voodoo to create the undead. The best example of this is Bela Lugosi's "White Zombie." "Plague of the Zombies"was the last great zombie film with the familiar Caribbean origin The film's villian, Squire Clive Hamilton, is a student of the Haitian occult and eagerly takes its teachings back to his native village. Carson's character is less evil than fanatic. Even as the net closes in on him, he can't stop from trying to turn pretty Sylvia Forbes (Clare) into a zombie. The scenes of zombies toiling in the abandoned tin mine and roaming the country are chilling, as is Alice Mary Thompson's (Pearce) change to a zombie.

As protagonist and antagonist, Morrel and Carson are superb. The former masters the droll wit and sense of honor of an old English gentleman. The latter mixes his mask of polite, gallant breeding very well with his loathsome zombie-creating persona. It's an effective contrast. The Cornwall villagers are realistic. "Plague of the Zombies" does a good job detailing the class differences between the ultra-rich squire and the poor villagers. The oppressed villagers are mere toys for greedy Squire Hamilton and his henchmen. This theme of class injustice lends depth to what might have been just a routine horror programmer.

"Plague of the Zombies" is worth more than a rental. Cult film collectors should own a copy for repeat viewings. It's an example of Hammer at its best. It can easily be found for sale in VHS or DVD prints.

Notes: Morrel, who died in 1978, had a long and distinguished career. His credits include "Dr. Who," "Quartermass and the Pit," "Ben Hur," and he was the voice of Elrond in Ralph Bakshi's animated "The Lord of the Rings." Director Gilling directed and produced the 1952 Bela Lugosi film "Old Mother Riley Meets the Vampire!" It wasn't until 1986 that another major release tackled the zombies, Caribbean curse plot. It was Wes Craven's "The Serpent and the Rainbow." An alternate title for "Plague of the Zombies" is "The Zombies." The film was released on a double bill with "Dracula: Prince of Darkness."

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Return of the Vampire

2008-08-13T22:52:00.000-07:00

Return of the Vampire, 1944, B&W, Columbia, 69 minutes. Directed by Lew Landers and Kurt Neumann. Starring Bela Lugosi as Armand Tesla, Frieda Inescort as Lady Jane Ainsley, Nina Foch as Nicki Saunders, Matt Willis as Andreas Obry. Schlock-meter rating: Seven and one-half stars out of 10.

Return of the Vampire was Bela Lugosi's main comeback vehicle in the first half of the 1940s. Lugosi was getting old, and had been relegated to roles in C productions. Columbia was a major studio but Return of the Vampire has a B movie feel to it, and the film failed to revive Lugosi's career. That's not the Hungarian actor's fault though. He's marvelous as Armand Tesla, a vampire trapped by a British family (the Ainsleys) in ruins during World War 1 and freed when his tomb is bombed during World War 2.

Now free, Tesla quickly goes after his revenge. He recruits his one-time werewolf assistant (Willis) and eventually tries to take off with pretty Nicki Saunders (Foch) before his werewolf slave turns on him. The scenes where Lugosi's vampire matches wits with Lady Jaine Ainsley (Inescort), who begins to realize just who he is, are superior moments in the film. The bomb-ravaged, smoky scenes are another highlight of the film, but the script is weak, although Lugosi does the best he can with the hammy dialogue. At the very end, in a heavy-handed attempt at humor, a skeptical police inspector turns to the camera and asks the audience if they believe what just transpired.

Except for a few RKO roles and a great turn as Dracula in Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein, Lugosi's career deteriorated badly after the mid-1940s. Work in even C productions like Monogram and PRC dried up, and it was only a few years before Lugosi was so desperate that he began accepting roles from schlock-meister Ed Wood. In this sense, Return of the Vampire is very important as it shows Lugosi at his best playing his signature role -- surprisingly, he only played a vampire in THREE films! Note: Plans were hatched for a sequel to Return of the Vampire, but were never realized.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Tom Sawyer, 1917

2008-08-12T23:19:00.000-07:00

Tom Sawyer, 44 minute-version, B&W, 1917. Directed by William Desmond Taylor. Starring Jack Pickford as Tom Sawyer, Edythe Chapman as Aunt Polly, Helen Gilmore as Widow Douglas, Robert Gordon as Huckleberry Finn and Clara Horton as Becky Thatcher. Schlock-meter rating: Eight stars out of 10.

This early silent is an interesting curio, creaky but far more entertaining than you'd think. Jack Pickford, brother of Mary, plays Mark Twain's famous scamp, and while he was old for the role (20), he pulls it off with a talented performance. His best scenes are when he cons his buddies into whitewashing the fence and his romance of Becky Thatcher, played by 13-year-old Clara Horton. Pickford had an "aw shucks" type of charm that must have made him pretty famous 85 years ago. Chapman as Aunt Polly is agreeably fussy and Gordon smirks effectively as Huckleberry Finn.

The acting is highly melodramatic, the sets are very effective. On the Internet Movie Database, on reviewer describes the film as having the "feel of an old photo album." Incredibly, this was not the first adapation of Twain's novel. That occurred in 1907. The film ends halfway through the novel, the climax being Tom and Huck crashing their own funeral. This has confused several reviewers, but the story goes that director Taylor divided the film into two movies. A year later he released Huck and Tom, which is the second half of the novel. The tinny score irritates a bit, but the film, recently shown on TCM cable channel, is a real treat for silent film buffs.

Director Taylor was murdered under mysterious circumstances in 1922, a scandal that still thrills Hollywood today. Star Jack Pickford died in 1933, his career and health ruined by fast living.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Zombies on Broadway

2008-08-11T22:55:00.000-07:00

Zombies on Broadway, 69 minutes, B&W, RKO. Directed by Gordon Douglas. Starring Wally Brown as Jerry Miles, Alan Carney as Mike Streger, Bela Lugosi as Dr. Paul Renault, Anne Jeffreys as Jean LaDance, Sheldon Leonard as Ace Miller and Darby Jones as Kolaga, the Zombie. Schlock-meter rating: Seven stars out of 10.

This is an enjoyable 1940s B movie with Brown and Carney, RKO's version of Abbott and Costello, as PR hustlers announcing that a new NYC nightclub, The Zombie Hut, will open with a real zombie. To them it's just a gag, but toughman mob owner Leonard tells them to come up with a zombie or else. That sends the boys to the island of San Sebastian where, with the help of a beautiful dancer (Jeffreys), the boys overcome a zombie creating mad scientist (Lugosi) and return with a zombie.

The cast is wonderful. Comedians Brown and Carney do a passable imitation of Abbott and Costello. Carney plays Costello, while Brown is the AbboTt clone who ends up with the strikingly beautiful Jeffreys. Leonard is menacing in his stock role as gangster hood. Thrown in for atmosphere is Darby Jones, who bugs his eyes out as impressively as he did in Val Lewton's classic I Walked With a Zombie. The film moves at a fast, easy pace. Lugosi is suitably conniving as the mad scientist and there's a fun twist ending.

RKO had high hopes for ex-vaudeville performers Carney and Brown, but they never seriously threatened Abbott and Costello at the box office. Still, they made several amusing B features and fading horror star Lugosi appeared in two, the other being One Body Too Many. This seldom-seen-today film is a must for Lugosi fans and those who enjoy the old 1940s B programmers.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Octaman

2008-08-07T10:25:00.000-07:00

A small ecological scientific expedition, headed by Kerwin Matthews,star of such great 1960s classics as Jack The Giant Killer and The 7th Voyage of Sinbad, travels to a small Latin American fishing community to study radioactive contamination in the water. Here they take blood samples of local villagers, since their diet consists mostly of foods found in the sea. One member of the expedition, Mort, discovers a strange, small creature similar to a small octopus. The creature looks like a cheap rubber toy for kids.

Matthews decides to return to the United States to seek more funding for his research and to continue the expedition. He presents his findings to Jeff Morrow, star of This Island Earth and The Creature Walks Among Us. Morrow is not convinced of Matthews' hypothesis that the small octa-creature is a result of contaminated water, so he decides not to fund the rest of the expedition.

Matthews then turns to a wealthy rancher named Johnny Caruso to fund the remainder of the expedition. Caruso is not a scientist, so his interest is mostly in finding his next sideshow attraction and to profit from its discovery.

After returning to Latin America, the expedition learns of a local myth of a giant half man, half sea creature, who attacks and murders local villagers. If any of this sounds familiar, that's because it was written and directed by Harry Essex, a screenwriter for the 1950s classic: The Creature From The Black Lagoon. Some viewers have described Octaman as a low-budget version of The Creature From The Black Lagoon. There are some similarities. For instance, there is a scene where the expedition is trying to leave the local area in their motor home. They encounter a fallen tree that blocks their path on the road, making it so that they cannot leave. This is similar to when the creature in The Creature From The Black Lagoon moves a fallen tree in front of the boat expedition.

It is important to note that the unique Octaman creature was an early creation of makeup wizard Rick Baker, who has gone on to have a very successful career in many big-budget Hollywood films, such as: American Werewolf In London, Star Wars and The Howling. Baker won an academy award for his work on American Werewolf In London and The Nutty Professor. His earliest work was Octaman and in assisting Dick Smith in make-up effects in The Exorcist. The female lead in Octaman, Pier Angeli, died of a barbiturate overdose while the film was in production.

The film was never released theatrically, and went straight to television and later video.

What makes Octaman so interesting is the fact that it is a summation of so many earlier monster movie creatures from the 1950s. As I watched Octaman, I couldn't help but think of the creature in Monster of Piedras Blancas, the tree creature in From Hell It Came, and of course The Creature From The Black Lagoon. Octaman is worthy of a viewing, if not only to see an interesting reference to so many classic monster movies of the 1950s and 1960s.

-- Steve D. Stones

Review: Godzilla versus Monster Zero

2008-08-06T07:30:00.000-07:00

Godzilla versus Monster Zero, 1965, directed by Ishiro Honda, color, 93 minutes. Starring Nick Adams as Astronaut Glenn, Akira Takarada as Astronaut K. Fuji, Yoshio Tsuchiya as Controller of Planet X and Kumi Mizuno as Miss Namikawa. Schlock-meter rating: Eight and one-half stars out of 10.

This is an extremely enjoyable, very campy monster-fest with shoddy but fun special effects as Godzilla and Rodan team up to defeat Monster Zero (also known as Ghidorah) and thwart the plans of the controller and the rest of the evil baddies who rule Planet X in a galaxy far, far away. Also, vampy Asian Kumi Mizuno plays a semi-robot spy who gets the hots for mumbling Nick Adams, the Marlon Brando of low budget shockers.

As is often the case with these wonderfully kitschy Japanese monster films, the plot seems to have been hatched out after an all-night mushroom party. Astronauts Adams and Takarada explore Planet X. There, they are told that Monster Zero threatens that planet and Godzilla and Rodan are needed on loan to beat him. The Planet Xers, to get Earth to help, offer a cure for all diseases as a swap for the muscle-bound monsters. Earth agrees but after the monsters are delivered, the baddies of Planet X pull a fast one, telling earthlings that unless they agree to be colonized, the three monsters will destroy Earth. Chaos results with lots of stock footage of wars and riots. All looks grim, but eventually hard-working scientists learn that a recently invented tinny sound can render the Planet X baddies insensible; also an electronic ray is invented to free Godzilla and Rodan from the computerized clutches of the Planet Xers, who are controlled by computers themselves.

The dubbing is surprisingly well done in the American version on AMC. Adams' Jersey persona is in great form as he utters lines like "dirty double crossers," "you rats," and even "baby!" during his romance with the spy Mizuno's Miss Namikawa. Notes: Adams and Mizuno were briefly lovers off the screen. They also starred together in Frankenstein Conquers the World. In 1968, Adams, who had once been nominated for an Academy Award before his career slipped, died of a drug overdose.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Dr. Terror's Gallery of Horrors

2008-08-05T09:33:00.000-07:00

Dr. Terror's Gallery of Horrors, 1966, Color, 82 minutes, American General Pictures. Directed by David L. Hewitt. Starring John Carradine, Lon Chaney Jr., Rochelle Hudson, Roger Gentry, Ron Doyle, Karen Joy, Vic Magee and Mitch Evans. Schlockmeter rating: Four stars out of 10.

This David Hewitt cheapie anthology of horror tales of questionable scariness is legendary for the panning it has received from critics of the genre. The critics are right; this a poor film, with an incredibly low budget. For the entire five tales, I counted only two sound stages. In one case, to save money I suppose, a sound stage was darkened in an unsuccesful effort to make it appear to be a London slum.

Dr. Terror's Gallery of Horrors was essentially an attempt to cash in on the horror anthology craze of the mid 1960s; two better films of that genre that come to mind are Dr. Terror's House of Horrors and Black Sabbath. According to reviewer Tom Weaver in Cult Movies 17, Gallery of Horrors was shot for either $60,000 (that seems too high) or $20,000, or even $15,000! The narrator for the five tales is the ubiquitious John Carradine. He stands in front of (I kid you not) a rigid screen mat of a castle and shoreline. The mat only takes up half the screen, so the producers filled the other half with a blue background.

The acting, except for Carradine, is atrocious from all the performers, including, unfortunately, Chaney Jr. Actress Karen Joy is at least beautiful. The tales are poorly developed. Reviewer John Stanley in Creature Features Movie Guide Strikes Again described the tales as the "scrapings of the horror barrel." There are "twist endings" but the lazy screenwriting (or perhaps it's the low budget) never allow the "payoff climax" to develop. A viewer will wait for the telegraphed twist at the end but just as it starts, the segment ends without exploring the consequences of the plot.

Like any low-budget poverty issue, the film is full of stock footage. According to Weaver's review, stock footage of castles and background music was lifted from the popular Edgar Allen Poe films of that era and other American International pictures. The special effects are laughable. Animated blood sweeps over the screen clumsily in an effort to end segments, and "fires" dance around stock footage of castles.

None of the five tales is particularly interesting, but some are less mediocre than others. The first concerns a couple (Gentry and Joy) who buy an old house in Salem. They find an old, supposedly 17th century clock (that type of clock did not exist in that era), re-set it, and an old man (Carradine, in the film's best performance, which isn't saying much)appears. He asks for an old family. The husband learns the family contained a witch (who never appears on screen by the way), and that Carradine and the witch are likely back from the dead because the haunted clock was re-started. The husband stops the clock, and Carradine burns up. The twist ending has another couple buying the house, setting the clock, and "presto," Carradine reappears.

The second tale is the worst. It concerns a vampire-like creature marauding London slum residents in the 18th century. The twist ending is embarrassing. The third tale may be the best. It had potential. A cuckolded living dead zombie doctor, murdered by his wife and corrupt colleague, returns with his faithful servant to exact revenge. Again, the low budget destroys any potential for surprise, and there is a laughably long far away stock shot of a carriage racing to the doctor's castle that seems to go on forever.

The fourth tale stars Lon Chaney Jr, as a former colleague of Dr. Frankenstein. Chaney's character is now a respected medical professor. With the help of two students, he resurrects a murderer. It's sad to watch the bloated semi-drunk, elderly Chaney stumble through his role. As Weaver points out, Chaney neither looks nor acts like a doctor and should have played the revived corpse (played by Vic Magee). Also, though it seems a colleague of Dr. Baron Von Frankenstein would be living in the 19th century, Chaney's character checks his wristwatch and answers a ringing 1960s-model phone in this episode. The final episode is a poor twist on the Dracula legend that ends with Jonathan Harker (Gentry)turning into a werewolf and turning on Count Alucard, played by Mitch Evans, hands-down the worst Dracula in screen history. Despite the poor quality of Dr. Terror's House of Horrors, it's worth a rental if it can be found. It's an example of the kind of low-budget, harmless, sometimes fun schlock that played drive-ins and on Chiller Theater on TV in the 1960s and 1970s.

Notes: According to Weaver, Carradine received $3,000 and Chaney Jr. $1,500. Also, Weaver said Carradine was supposed to play Count Alucard, but had to leave to fulfill another acting commitment. Gallery of Horrors was the last speaking role Chaney Jr. had. Like many low-budget films, the film had many titles. Others include The Blood Suckers, Gallery of Horrors, Return From the Past (it's TV title) and even Alien Massacre! In 1981 it was released to video as Gallery of Horror by Academy Home Entertainment. How disappointed many teens must have been after renting this "unrated" title with a misleading cover, thinking it was a very gory horror flick, and discovering a hokey, tame unscary G-rated film! Today the film can be purchased via www.moviesunlimited.com and is often available at ebay for auction.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Dead Men Walk

2008-07-31T07:34:00.000-07:00

This 1940s PRC cheapie about a vampire who rises from the grave and attempts to destroy his niece to spite his brother is a lot of fun. It stars horror great Zucco in dual roles; as ocultist brother Elwyn who is murdered by his good brother, a doctor named Lloyd, also played by Zucco. Alas, the evil Elwyn's death fails. Elwyn has learned how to resurrect himself as a vampire. With the help of demented servant Zolarr (Frye in a great, meaty role), he begins to murder. A woman driven crazy by grief (Emmett) suspects him, but no one takes her seriously. Once she starts to gain credibility, she is killed off by Zolarr. Elywn's chief target, however, is revenge against his brother. He appears to the startled doctor, and promises to suck the lifeblood from his beautiful niece Gayle (Carlisle). She's engaged to another doctor (Young) who, as Gayle starts to wither away, begins to suspect Lloyd of trying to kill her. There are rumors all over town that Lloyd killed Elwyn and the townspeople, spurred by the murders, start to talk vigilantism. The sheriff blusters a lot, but accomplishes little. Eventually, there is a showdown between the undead Elwyn and brother Lloyd.
The low budget, of course seriously hampers the film. The FXs are virtually non-existent. Zucco's Elwyn seems to fade away rather than pass through walls. The lighting is very poor. The script weak. Many of the characters are stereotypes. There's the rich doctor, the rich young couple, the crazy old lady, the blustery sheriff, the very superstitious townspeople. The acting, except for Zuco and Frye, is quite poor. The direction, by cheapie legend, Newfield, is pedestrian. However, the plot is quite unique for a vampire film of that era. Film writer Frank Dello Stritto, writing in Cult Movies 27, describes Dead Men Walk as the best plotted vampire film of that era. However, Dello Stritto agrees the finished product is mediocre.
Nevertheless, Zucco is magnificent. The doctors are not cast as twins. It's amazing how different Zucco appears as the respected Dr. Lloyd Clayton and the balding, gaunt brother Elwyn. His timing and delivery is first rate. Frye's Zucco is menacing, and watching it is bittersweet, since the talented horror star died of a heart attack a few months after completing the film. Students of the early horror films, particulary Poverty Row Bs, should own Dead Men Walk. It's easily available on VHS or DVD.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: King of the Zombies

2008-07-30T07:11:00.000-07:00

King of the Zombies, 1941, B&W, 67 minutes. Directed by Jean Yarbrough. Starring Dick Purcell, Joan Woodbury, Mantan Moreland. Schlock-Meter rating 6 stars out of 10.

This is an old curio from Monogram, forgotten by most, enjoyed by purists. The plot involves three men in a plane who crash land in a West Indies island and encounter a very strange doctor (the role cries out for Bela Lugosi) who has a zombie-like wife, a cute secretary, and a collection of zombies. He also has an allied military officer held captive (it's WW2), and the convoluted plot involves the mad doctor wanting allied military secrets. He's foiled, of course, as his zombies eventually turn on him.

The film has none of the atmosphere, moods or chills of White Zombie. It substitutes comic relief for frights. The only character who shows any real depth is Mantan Moreland, who plays Jeff, the black sidekick of the crash victims. It's a very racist role, from a different, less-tolerant era, but Moreland, whose first name is even a tacky racist gag, brings life to his character. The scenes where he mistakenly believes he's a zombie are very funny. There is the usual romance between crash victim Purcell and secretary Woodbury.

Not a great film, but worth a look for fans and others who want to study the C movies from poverty row 60-plus years ago. Notes: Yarbrough also directed the Lugosi PRC film Devil Bat; It's rumored that Lugosi was slated to play the mad doctor in King of the Zombies. It certainly would have been a nice contrast to his evil, mad doctor role in White Zombie.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: London Kills Me

2008-07-28T17:32:00.000-07:00

London Kills Me, 1992, 107 minutes, color, United Kingdom. Written and directed by Hanif Kureishi. Starring Justin Chadwick as Clint Eastwood, Steven Mackintosh as Muffdiver, Fiona Shaw as Headley, Emer McCourt as Sylvie, Tony Haygarth as Burns, Naveen Andrews as Bike, Roshan Seth as Dr. Bubba, and Brad Dourif as Hemingway. Rating on a scale of 10: 8.

London Kills Me seems a cross between Trainspotting and Drugstore Cowboy, yet a cut below those films, and not quite as gritty in its portrayal of the drug culture. It’s more lighthearted, and frankly, the actors look too cute and healthy to be drug addicts. But it’s still a superior film, and a great directing debut for writer Hanif Kureishi, who captures the seediness of the post-Tory ruled London in the early 1990s.

The plot, which is amusingly off the wall, concerns a very small-time London drug team run by Muffdiver (Mackintosh, who looks just like Charlie Hero of Buddha of Suburbia), and populated by his sellers, one of whom, Clint Eastwood (Chadwick) is disillusioned with drugs and wants a job as a waiter in an upscale cafe. The cafe’s manager Hemingway (Brad Dourif, in a great cameo), says he can have the job if he can come up with a cool pair of shoes to wear by Tuesday. No shoes, no job, says Hemingway. Also, the drug team breaks into and squats a luxury condo so they can impress some high-level drug dealers who Muffdiver wants to deal with.

That’s the plot, and it’s a lot of fun. Kureishi provides viewers quite a glimpse into the underbelly of London and the young grifters who populate it, selling and seeking drugs, sleeping where and with whom they can. Chadwick is a talented youngster, but he seems too pretty to be a homeless drug addict. Mackintosh is great as the small drug lord. As in other films, he uses his face and eyes to betray his anger and frustration.

The talented Naveen Andrews seems wasted as a bicycle-freak named Bike, and I would have preferred him in the Clint Eastwood role. Roshan Seth is marvelous as a serene guru named Dr. Bubba. Young actress Emer McCourt is Sylvie, the one girl in the drug team, and the object of both Muffdiver’s and Clint’s lust. Her character seems to be the one who actually suffers in this film. She mutilates herself and in one scene, suffers a bad case of the drug shakes. Film has an upbeat ending that is generally in sync with the light treatment of the topic.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: The Creeping Terror

2008-07-23T06:10:00.000-07:00

The Creeping Terror, 1964, 75 minutes, B&W, Metropolitan International Pictures. Directed by Art J. Nelson. Starring Nelson as Martin Gordon, Shannon O’Neil as Brett Gordon, William Thourlby as Dr. Bradford, John Caresio as Colonel Caldwell, Brendan Boone as Barney. Schlock-Meter rating: 2 and 1/2 stars out of 10.

The Creeping Terror is an abysmal, patched-together mess of a horror film. Watching it, I wonder to myself: How did films this bad get distributed? There was no family VCR in 1964. Did people actually go to the drive-in to see The Creeping Terror of Beast of Yucca Flats. Did they play the second half of a double-bill? Or grind houses on 42nd Street in Manhattan? I would love to know the answer.
Plot: A spaceship falls to the earth. It contains two monsters, one of which hides for most of the film. The monsters look just like a carpet gone amok. They are killer carpets (not at all scary) that slither along the earth at about two miles an hour. Despite that, their victims oblige them by standing very still, or backing slowly away, and allowing themselves to be pulled by unseen hands into the killer carpet. There is a scene, at a dance, where the carpet waddles in and kills most of the dancers, who just stare at it with barely disguised boredom. It is perhaps the worst edited scene ever filmed.
Near the end we learn that the killer carpet machines are from another world in outer space and they kill to analyze human body parts and learn our weaknesses as humans. How that was learned is mystery, since a healthy chunk of the dialogue is missing. Like the wretched Beast of Yucca Flats, viewers endure a pompous narrator who besides giving us the plot, gives a long-winded soliloquy on the joys of marriage. A sheriff’s deputy (Nelson) and his bride (O’Neil) help out the U.S. military in battling the killer carpets.
I’ve heard stories that director/star Nelson was a gadfly who rolled into a California community with his girlfriend O’Neil and convinced many townspeople to back him financially in a “can’t-win” horror film he wanted to make. To keep the cash rolling in, Nelson gave many of The Creeping Terror’s financial backers bit parts in the film. Then, the story goes, he skipped town before the investors could see what a dog of a film they were left with. If that tale is true, it’s far more entertaining than The Creeping Terror.

-- Doug Gibson

Review: Invasion of the Saucer Men

2008-07-22T07:00:00.000-07:00

Invasion of the Saucer Men, 1957, B&W, 69 minutes, American International Pictures. Directed by Edward L. Cahn. Starring Steve Terrell as Johnny Carter, Gloria Castillo as Joan Hayden, Frank Gorshin as Joe Gruen, Raymond Hatton as Farmer Larkin, Lyn Osborn as Artie Burns, Douglas Henderson as Lt. Wilkins, USAF, and Don Shelton as City Attorney Hayden. Schlock-Meter rating: 6 and 1/2 stars out of 10.

Invasion of the Saucer Men is a light, well-made horror parody about weird, large-headed men from outer space who inject humans and animals with alcohol until they are foiled by teens upset that their favorite make-out spot has been invaded by the creatures.

You have a lot of disbelieving adults, a couple of goofy salesmen attacked by the Saucer Men, two teens in love who no one will believe their tales of Saucer Men, and even some military officers trying to hush up the whole outer space attack! There’s even one more plot staple in this witty, but dated parody: The crusty old farmer who hates those kids necking on his property and blames them for his bull coming home drunk with “the blind staggers.”

It’s a great plot. The filmmakers give us a lot of action for the film’s compact 69 minutes. However, since this AIP drive-in staple doesn’t take it seriously, it loses a couple of stars. A great cult film needs to (most of the time) to take itself seriously. However, it’s still a lot of fun watching this 1950s ancestor of today’s “Scream” parodies.

Oh yes, teen queen Castillo, who is the city attorney’s (Shelton) daughter, has a car named “Elvis,” which is a nice touch for the times. Funny man Frank Gorshin plays a down-on-his-luck salesman, who besides having a pretty lame line when it comes to picking up a tired waitress, also is the only one unlucky enough to be killed by the Saucer Men. The film moves briskly along and actors deliver lines in a slightly goofy manner that holds with the light fare of the film. The Saucer Men are sufficiently bizarre and there’s a crawling hand that manages to create mischief. (I wonder if that alien “hand” served as inspiration for the malicious hand in Sam Raimi’s “Evil Dead 2.”

-- Doug Gibson